In their foolhardy quest to collect every item, this player comes 7,986 short.

• Franken Stein
• "DEBBIE" tattoo kit
• "DRINK ME" potion
• "KICK ME" sign
• "Remember the Trees" Shirt
• "caramel" orange
• "honey" dipper
• "meat" stick
• 'Villa' document
• 'WILL WORK FOR BOOZE' sign
• 1 Meat
• 1,970 carat gold
• 1-ball
• 1.21 jigawatts
• 1/6th Pound Cake
• 100-Watt bulb
• 11-leaf clover
• 17-ball
• 18-picohertz resonator crystal
• 1952 Mickey Mantle card
• 2-ball
• 2002 Mr. Store Catalog
• 25-meat staff
• 3-ball
• 30669 scroll
• 33398 scroll
• 334 scroll
• 4-ball
• 4-d camera
• 4-dimensional fez
• 4-dimensional guitar
• 4:20 bomb
• 5-ball
• 5-hour acrimony
• 6-ball
• 64067 scroll
• 668 scroll
• 7-Foot Dwarven mattock
• 7-ball
• 7-inch discus
• 8-ball
• 8-billed baseball cap
• 8-bit banana
• 9-ball
• 99.44% pure math
• A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5
• A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6
• A Guide to Safari
• A Light that Never Goes Out
• ASCII fu manchu
• ASCII shirt
• Abuela Crimbo's special magnet
• Abyssal ember
• Accordion of Jordion
• Acqua Del Piatto Merlot
• Acque Luride Grezze Cabernet
• Admiral's hat
• Adventurer's Kit
• Aerheads
• Afternoon Delight
• Agent Corrigan's cigarette
• Agent Mauve
• Aggressive Carrot
• Agitated Turkey
• Aiolion
• Aldebaran sardines
• Alewife™ Ale
• Alexy sauce
• Alice's Army Dervish
• Alice's Army Foil Alchemist
• Alice's Army Foil Bowman
• Alice's Army Foil Cleric
• Alice's Army Foil Coward
• Alice's Army Foil Dervish
• Alice's Army Foil Guard
• Alice's Army Foil Halberder
• Alice's Army Foil Hammerman
• Alice's Army Foil Horseman
• Alice's Army Foil Lanceman
• Alice's Army Foil Mad Bomber
• Alice's Army Foil Martyr
• Alice's Army Foil Ninja
• Alice's Army Foil Nurse
• Alice's Army Foil Page
• Alice's Army Foil Shieldmaiden
• Alice's Army Foil Sniper
• Alice's Army Foil Spearsman
• Alice's Army Foil Swordsman
• Alice's Army Foil Wallman
• Alice's Army Foil tattoo
• Alice's Army Guard
• Alice's Army Halberder
• Alice's Army Hammerman
• Alice's Army Horseman
• Alice's Army Lanceman
• Alice's Army Martyr
• Alice's Army Ninja
• Alice's Army Nurse
• Alice's Army Page
• Alice's Army Shieldmaiden
• Alice's Army Sniper
• Alice's Army Spearsman
• Alice's Army Swordsman
• Alice's Army Wallman
• Amanitee
• Amnesiac Ale
• Amulet of Yendor
• Angry Farmer candy
• Angry Farmer's Wife Candy
• Ankh of Badahnkadh
• Anniversary Miniature Sword & Martini Guy
• Annual Ascot
• Antagonistic Snowman Kit
• Apriling band helmet
• Arrow (+1)
• Arrrmetia trading card
• Artist's Butterknife of Regret
• Artist's Cookie Cutter of Loneliness
• Artist's Crème Brulée Torch of Fury
• Artist's Spatula of Despair
• Artist's Whisk of Misery
• Ascension Souvenir T-Shirt
• Asdon Martin keyfob (on ring)
• Asleep in the Cemetery
• Atomic Comic
• Atomic Pop
• Aura Libre
• Aye Aye
• Aye Aye, Captain
• Aye Aye, Tooth Tooth
• BACON
• BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt
• BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt
• BGE merchandise order form
• BGE pocket calendar
• BGE shotglass
• BGE temporary tattoo
• BGE tiny plastic toy
• BOOterfinger
• BOOtonniere
• BRAINS shorts
• BRICKO airship
• BRICKO bat
• BRICKO brick
• BRICKO bulwark
• BRICKO cathedral
• BRICKO egg
• BRICKO eye brick
• BRICKO gargantuchicken
• BRICKO hat
• BRICKO ooze
• BRICKO pants
• BRICKO pearl
• BRICKO pyramid
• BRICKO python
• BRICKO sword
• BRICKO trunk
• BROS Energy Drink
• BUBBLE GUM
• Baja sopapilla
• Bal-musette accordion
• Banfoy's Boutique Order Form
• Bangyomaman battle juice
• Bartles and BRAAAINS wine cooler
• Barulio's bottle
• Bash-Ōs cereal
• Bastille Battalion Fondue Trophy
• Bastille Battalion cheese wheel
• Bastille Battalion control rig
• Bastille Battalion control rig crate
• Bastille Battalion control rig loaner voucher
• Bastille Battalion tattoo kit
• Battlie Light Saver
• Beach Comb
• Bee's Knees
• Beefy Crunch Pastaco
• Beignet Milgranet
• Belt of Loathing
• Ben-Gal™ Balm
• Benetton's Medley of Diversity
• Better Shrooms and Gardens catalog
• Better Than Cuddling Cake
• Bettie page
• Bicycle
• Biddy Cracker's Old-Fashioned Cookbook
• Big Punk
• Bigger Bugfinder Blade
• Bird-a-Day calendar
• Bit O' Ectoplasm
• Bit O' Quail Spleen
• BitterSweetTarts
• BittyCar HotCar
• BittyCar MeatCar
• BittyCar SoulCar
• Black Angus blackburger
• Black Bart's Booty
• Black Body™ spray
• Black Hole
• Black No. 2
• Blackfly Chardonnay
• Blatantly Canadian
• Blizzards I Have Died In
• Blood 'n' Plenty
• Blood Light
• Bloody Nora
• Bluzzard
• Bohemian rhapsody
• Boletus Broletus mushroom
• Bone's Farm "wine"
• Bonestabber
• Boozehounds Anonymous token
• Bordeaux Marteaux
• Boris's key lime
• Boris's key lime pie
• Boris's ring
• Boss Drops
• Boulevardier cocktail
• Bowl of Scorpions
• Bowlet
• Boxing Day Pass
• Brain Food Pastaco
• Bram's choker
• Breakfast Blast wine cooler
• Breathitin™
• Bright Water
• Brimstone Chicken Sandwich
• Brogre brolo shirt
• Brogre brorts
• Brogre bucket hat
• Bruno's blessing of Mars
• Bugbearclaw Donut
• Bugfinder Blade
• Bulky Buddy Box
• Burt's blessing of Bacchus
• Bustle Hustler
• Buttery Knob
• C.A.R.N.I.V.O.R.E. button
• C.H.U.M. chum
• C.H.U.M. knife
• C.H.U.M. lantern
• CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1)
• CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2)
• CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3)
• CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4)
• CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5)
• CRIMBCO scrip
• CRIMBCOIDS mints
• CRIMBCOLOAF
• CSA all-purpose soap
• CSA bravery badge
• CSA cheerfulness ration
• CSA discount card
• CSA obedience grenade
• CSA scoutmaster's "water"
• Caipiranha
• Cajun accordion
• Camp Scout pup tent
• Can of Spaghetto
• Can-Can skirt
• Candicaine
• Candy Alexander
• Cantelope
• Caramel
• Cargo Cultist Shorts
• Carol of the Bulls (used)
• Carol of the Hells (used)
• Carol of the Thrills (used)
• Carpricorn
• Cat-Herding Prod
• Celsius 233
• Cement Mixer
• Centauri fish wine
• Cerebral Cloche
• Cerebral Crossbow
• Cerebral Culottes
• Chakra Libre
• Charity's choker
• Charleston shoes
• Ched
• Cheer-Up soda
• Cherry Cloaca Cola
• Cherrytastrophe wine cooler
• Cheshire Bitten
• Chester's bag of candy
• ChibiBuddy™ (off)
• ChibiBuddy™ (on)
• Children's Meal of the Damned
• Chinese curse words
• Choker of the Ultragoth
• Chorale of Companionship
• Chori Zo trading card
• Chroner cross
• Chroner trigger
• Chubby and Plump bar
• Churchill
• Cincho de Mayo
• Cinco Mayo Lager
• Citrus Crush wine cooler
• Clan Carnival Game
• Clan Floundry
• Clan VIP Lounge key
• Clan hot dog stand
• Clan looking glass
• Clan shower
• Clan speakeasy
• Claybender glasses
• Climate Colada
• Cloaca Cola Polar
• Cloaca grenade
• Cloaca-Cola
• Cloaca-Cola c-rations
• Cloaca-Cola fatigues
• Cloaca-Cola helmet
• Cloaca-Cola knapsack
• Cloaca-Cola shield
• Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife
• Cobb's Knob Wurstbrau
• Cobra Bowl
• Cocktails of the Age of Sail
• Cocktails of the Age of Sail (used)
• Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration
• Cold Fang
• Cold Hots candy
• Cold One
• Colera Peste Nebbiolo
• Colon Annihilation Hot Sauce
• Colonel Mustard's Lonely Spades Club Jacket
• Comet Drop
• Connery's Elixir of Audacity
• Conspiracy™ mascara
• Cookbook of the Damned
• Cool Brunch Pastaco
• Cornbeefadon
• Corporal Fennel's Lonely Clubs Club Jacket
• Corpse Island iced tea
• Counterclockwise Watch
• Covers-Your-Head
• Cracklin' Oat Bran
• Crazymaker
• Crepes a la Lune
• Crimbeau de toilette
• Crimbo Candy Cookbook
• Crimbo Carol tattoo kit
• Crimbo Cheer tattoo kit
• Crimbo Commerce tattoo kit
• Crimbo Elf creepy bobble-head
• Crimbo Factory surprise box
• Crimbo bottomless hot cocoa mug
• Crimbo candied pecan
• Crimbo candle
• Crimbo dinner
• Crimbo dog sweater
• Crimbo food scraps
• Crimbo fudge
• Crimbo light-up Rudolph doll
• Crimbo paste
• Crimbo peppermint bark
• Crimbo pie
• Crimbo pressie
• Crimbo salad
• Crimbo smile
• Crimbo stocking
• Crimbo stockings
• Crimbo stogie-scented room odorizer
• Crimbo tattoo kit
• Crimbo train emergency brake
• Crimbo training manual
• Crimbo tree flocker
• Crimbo ukulele
• Crimbo wreath
• Crimbojito
• Crimbolex watch
• Crimbomega drive chain
• Crimbonium fuel rod
• Crimbosmopolitan
• Crimbot ROM: Mathematical Precision
• Crimbot ROM: Rapid Prototyping
• Crimbot ROM: Ruthless Efficiency
• Crimbot battery
• Crimbot schematic: Big Head
• Crimbot schematic: Big Wheel
• Crimbot schematic: Bit Masher
• Crimbot schematic: Bug Zapper
• Crimbot schematic: Camera Claw
• Crimbot schematic: Candle Lighter
• Crimbot schematic: Cold Shoulder
• Crimbot schematic: Crab Core
• Crimbot schematic: Cyclopean Torso
• Crimbot schematic: Dynamo Head
• Crimbot schematic: Grease / Regular Gun
• Crimbot schematic: Grease Gun
• Crimbot schematic: Gun Face
• Crimbot schematic: Gun Legs
• Crimbot schematic: Heavy Treads
• Crimbot schematic: Heavy-Duty Legs
• Crimbot schematic: High-Speed Fan
• Crimbot schematic: Hoverjack
• Crimbot schematic: Lamp Filler
• Crimbot schematic: Maxi-Mag Lite
• Crimbot schematic: Mega Vise
• Crimbot schematic: Military Chassis
• Crimbot schematic: Mobile Girder
• Crimbot schematic: Nerding Module
• Crimbot schematic: Power Arm
• Crimbot schematic: Power Stapler
• Crimbot schematic: Really Big Head
• Crimbot schematic: Refrigerator Chassis
• Crimbot schematic: Rivet Shocker
• Crimbot schematic: Rocket Skirt
• Crimbot schematic: Rodent Gun
• Crimbot schematic: Rollerfeet
• Crimbot schematic: Security Chassis
• Crimbot schematic: Sim-Simian Feet
• Crimbot schematic: Snow Blower
• Crimbot schematic: Swiss Arm
• Crimbot schematic: Tripod Legs
• Crimbot schematic: Wrecking Ball
• Crimbough
• Crimboween memo
• Crimboysters Rockefeller
• Crimbuccaneer bombjacket
• Crimbuccaneer breeches
• Crimbuccaneer captain's purse
• Crimbuccaneer fledges (disintegrating)
• Crimbuccaneer fledges (mint)
• Crimbuccaneer flotsam
• Crimbuccaneer invasion map
• Crimbuccaneer lantern
• Crimbuccaneer mologrog cocktail
• Crimbuccaneer nose ring
• Crimbuccaneer premium booty sack
• Crimbuccaneer rigging lasso
• Crimbuccaneer runebone
• Crimbuccaneer shirt
• Crimbuccaneer squirtblunderbuss
• Crimbuccaneer tattoo gift certificate
• Crimbuccaneer tavern swab
• Crimbuccaneer tricorn
• Crimbuccaneer war standard
• Crimbuccaneer whale oil
• Crimbylow-rise jeans
• Cursed Punch
• Cycloney
• D roll
• DUFRESNE Suds
• Dad's brandy
• Daffy Taffy
• Dallas Dynasty Falcon Crest shield
• Danglin' Chad's loincloth
• Dark & Starry
• Das Überkühlraum trading card
• Daylight Shavings Helmet
• Deactivated MiniMechaElf
• Deactivated O. A. F.
• Deck of Every Card
• Deep Machine Tunnels snowglobe
• Dennis's blessing of Minerva
• Devil's Elbow Hot Sauce
• Diamond HP-35 Calculator
• Diet Cloaca Cola
• Dinsey Maintenance Manual
• Dinsey tattoo kit
• Disgeist
• Dish of Clarified Butter
• Divine
• Doc Clock's thyme cocktail
• Doc Galaktik's Ailment Ointment
• Doc Galaktik's Homeopathic Elixir
• Doc Galaktik's Invigorating Tonic
• Doc Galaktik's Pungent Unguent
• Doc Galaktik's Restorative Balm
• Doc Galaktik's Vitality Serum
• Doc's Fortifying Wine
• Doc's Limbering Wine
• Doc's Medical-Grade Wine
• Doc's Miracle Cure
• Doc's Smartifying Wine
• Doc's Special Reserve Wine
• Dogsgotnonoz pills
• Doll Moll violin case
• Dolph Bossin's Crimbo hat
• Dolph Bossin's charity note
• Dolphin King's crown
• Double Bacon Beelzeburger
• Doublepunchplanter
• Drac & Tan
• Dragonscale breastplate
• Drapes-You-Regally
• Dreadsylvania Auditor's badge
• Dreadsylvanian Almanac page
• Dreadsylvanian clockwork key
• Dreadsylvanian cold pocket
• Dreadsylvanian cold-fashioned
• Dreadsylvanian dank and stormy
• Dreadsylvanian grimlet
• Dreadsylvanian hemlock
• Dreadsylvanian hot pocket
• Dreadsylvanian hot toddy
• Dreadsylvanian seed pod
• Dreadsylvanian shepherd's pie
• Dreadsylvanian skeleton key
• Dreadsylvanian sleaze pocket
• Dreadsylvanian slithery nipple
• Dreadsylvanian spooky pocket
• Dreadsylvanian stew
• Dreadsylvanian stink pocket
• Dressage
• Drip Institute petri dish
• Drip harness
• Driplet
• Dripwood slab
• Drizzlers™ Black Licorice
• Drunk Uncles holo-record
• Drunken Astrophysicist
• Drunken Neurologist
• Drunken Philosopher
• Drunkula's bell
• Drunkula's cape
• Drunkula's ring of haze
• Drunkula's silky pants
• Drunkula's wineglass
• Dump Truck
• Duskwalker fangs
• Duskwalker syringe
• Dust bunny
• Dweebisol™ inhaler
• Dyspepsi grenade
• Dyspepsi-Cola
• Dyspepsi-Cola d-rations
• Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues
• Dyspepsi-Cola helmet
• Dyspepsi-Cola knapsack
• Dyspepsi-Cola shield
• Dyspepsi-Cola-issue canteen
• EMD holo-record
• Earring of Fire
• Earth and Firewater
• Earth, Wind and Firewater
• Eau de Guaneau
• Ecto-Cooler
• Effermint™ tablets
• Egnaro berry
• Eight Days a Week Pill Keeper
• El Vibrato Megadrone
• El Vibrato punchcard (104 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (115 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (129 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (142 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (165 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (176 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (182 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (213 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (216 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (88 holes)
• El Vibrato punchcard (97 holes)
• El Vibrato translator
• El Vibrato trapezoid
• Eldritch Intellect: Journey into a Mind of Horror
• Eldritch snap
• Electric Punch
• Elf Army machine parts
• Elf Farm Raffle ticket
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Culinary Arts
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Culinary Arts (used)
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Extortion
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Extortion (used)
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Wilderness Sleeping
• Elf Guard Field Manual: Wilderness Sleeping (used)
• Elf Guard SCUBA tank
• Elf Guard broom
• Elf Guard clipboard
• Elf Guard commandeering gloves
• Elf Guard eyedrops
• Elf Guard fuel tank
• Elf Guard hangover cure
• Elf Guard honor present
• Elf Guard hotpants
• Elf Guard insignia (general)
• Elf Guard insignia (private)
• Elf Guard mouthknife
• Elf Guard officer's sidearm
• Elf Guard patrol cap
• Elf Guard payroll bag
• Elf Guard red and white beret
• Elf Guard safety bear
• Elf Guard squirtgun
• Elf Guard strategic map
• Elf Guard temporary (permanent) tattoo
• Elf Guard war standard
• Elfin shortbread
• Elizabeth's paintbrush
• Elmley shades
• Elron's Explosive Etude
• Elvish delight
• Elvish underarmor
• Emblem of Ak'gyxoth
• En Una Fila Tequila
• Enchanted Flyswatter
• Enchanted Plunger
• Energy Buzz Pastaco
• Engorged Sausages and You
• Ent cider
• Essence of Annoyance
• Essence of Bear
• Event Horizon
• Everfull Dart Holster
• Everlasting Deckswabber
• Every Day is Like This Sundae
• Extra-slimy Slimosa
• Extrovermectin™
• Eye and a Twist
• FDKOL fire hose
• FDKOL hotcakes
• Fabiotion
• Familiar-Gro™ Terrarium
• Fantasma en la Máquina
• FantasyRealm guest pass
• FantasyRealm key
• FantasyRealm tattoo kit
• FantasyRealm turkey leg
• Fauna Libre
• Faux
• Feliz Navidad
• Ferita Del Petto Zinfandel
• Ferrigno's Elixir of Power
• Fettris
• Feynman gate
• Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy
• Finnish Fish
• Firewater
• First Post shirt - Cir Senam
• First Post shirt package
• Fitspiration™ poster
• Five Second Energy™
• Flag by the Foot™
• Flamin' Whatshisname
• Flaming Caipiranha
• Flaming Knob
• Flaming Mohobo
• Flaming Sazerorc
• Flan
• Flan in the Moon
• Flaskfull of Hollow
• Fleshazole™
• Flivver
• Fly-By-Knight Heraldry form
• Flying Caipiranha
• Fog Murderer
• Fourth of May Cosplay Saber
• Frank Gorshin trophy
• Frankly Mr. Shank
• Frat Army FGF
• Freddie's blessing of Mercury
• French bronilla brogurt
• French-Transylvanian Dictionary
• Friendliness Beverage
• Friendly Turkey
• Frigid Northern Beans
• Frogade
• Fromage Pinotage
• Frost™ brand sword
• Frosty's snowball sack
• Frown Exerciser
• Fu Manchu Wax
• Fudge Fiber Armor Plating
• Fudgie Roll
• Fun-Guy spore
• Fuzzy Tentacle
• GOTO
• Gabarbar
• Gaia beads
• GameInformPowerDailyPro magazine
• Gathered Meat-Clip
• Gazelleton
• Gazpacho's Glacial Grimoire
• Gearhead Goo
• Genalen™ Bottle
• Gene Tonic: Beast
• Gene Tonic: Constellation
• Gene Tonic: Construct
• Gene Tonic: Demon
• Gene Tonic: Dude
• Gene Tonic: Elemental
• Gene Tonic: Elf
• Gene Tonic: Fish
• Gene Tonic: Goblin
• Gene Tonic: Hippy
• Gene Tonic: Hobo
• Gene Tonic: Horror
• Gene Tonic: Humanoid
• Gene Tonic: Insect
• Gene Tonic: Mer-kin
• Gene Tonic: Orc
• Gene Tonic: Penguin
• Gene Tonic: Pirate
• Gene Tonic: Plant
• Gene Tonic: Slime
• Gene Tonic: Undead
• Gene Tonic: Weird
• General Assembly Module
• General Sage's Lonely Diamonds Club Jacket
• Gets-You-Drunk
• Ghiaccio Colada
• Ghosprey
• Ghost Dog Chow
• Ghost Pinching Quarterly
• Gin Mint
• Glamare
• Glo-Pop
• Globmule
• Glum berry
• Gnollish Crossdress
• Gnollish autoplunger
• Gnollish casserole dish
• Gnollish flyswatter
• Gnollish pie server
• Gnollish pie tin
• Gnollish plunger
• Gnollish sangria
• Gnollish slotted spoon
• Gnollish toolbox
• Gnomish sagngria
• Gnomish toolbox
• Gnomitronic Hyperspatial Demodulizer
• Go-Wassail
• Goggles of Loathing
• Gold Velvet™ whiskey
• Golden HP-35 Calculator
• Golden Kokomo Resort Chip
• Golden Light
• Golden Mean
• Golden Mr. Accessory
• Golden Mr. Eh?
• Good 'n' Quiet
• Good 'n' Slimy
• Gordon Bennett
• Gorillape
• Grasshopper
• Grateful Undead T-shirt
• Gratitude chocolate (octopus-filled)
• Great Older Fashioned
• Great S-Cape
• Great Wolf's beastly trousers
• Great Wolf's headband
• Great Wolf's left paw
• Great Wolf's lice
• Great Wolf's right paw
• Great Wolf's rocket launcher
• Greek fire
• Green Burlap
• Green Giant
• Green Manalishi
• Green Muslin
• Green Velvet
• Gregarious Gregorian Smock
• Grey Guanon
• Grim Brothers' story book
• Grimacite Bock
• Grimacite gaiters
• Grimacite galoshes
• Grimacite garter
• Grimacite gasmask
• Grimacite gat
• Grimacite gauntlets
• Grimacite girdle
• Grimacite glaive
• Grimacite go-go boots
• Grimacite goggles
• Grimacite gorget
• Grimacite gown
• Grimacite greaves
• Grimacite guayabera
• Groll doll
• Gummi-DNA
• Gummi-Gnauga
• Gummi-Memory
• Gummy Brains
• Guzzlr application
• Guzzlr hat
• Guzzlr pants
• Guzzlr shoes
• Guzzlr souvenir stein
• Guzzlr tablet
• Guzzlr tattoo kit
• Gygaxian Libram
• Gyromitra Dynomita mushroom
• HOA citation pad
• HOA regulation book
• HOA zombie eyes
• HP-35 Calculator
• Hairpiece On Fire
• Half a Purse
• Hand in Glove
• Hand that Rocks the Ladle
• Handsome Devil
• Hanukkimbo dreidl
• Happy Birthday, Claude! cake
• Hat O' Nine Tails
• Hatorade
• Haunted Sorority House staff guide
• Hawking's Elixir of Brilliance
• Haymaker
• Heimz Fortified Kidney Beans
• Hell and How I Bent It
• Hell broth
• Hellfire Spicy Beans
• Helps-You-Sleep
• Helvella Haemophilia mushroom
• Herring Daiquiri
• Herring Wallbanger
• Herringtini
• Hersey™ SMOOCH
• Hide-rox™ cookie
• Highest Bitter
• Himalayan Hidalgo sauce
• Hippy Army MPE
• History's Most Offensive Jokes, Vol. IX
• Hjodor's Guide to Arctic Dalmatians
• Hodgman's almanac
• Hodgman's disgusting technicolor overcoat
• Hodgman's harmonica
• Hodgman's imaginary hamster
• Hodgman's journal #1: The Lean Times
• Hodgman's lucky sock
• Hodgman's metal detector
• Hodgman's whackin' stick
• Holiday Fun!
• Holiday Hal's Happy-Time Fun Book!
• Hollandaise helmet
• Homebodyl™
• Horsery contract
• Hot 'n' Scarys
• Hot Socks
• Hotwire™ brand candy rope
• How to Avoid Scams
• How to Hold a Grudge
• How to Play Othello
• How to Tolerate Jerks
• Huggler Radio
• Humanitini
• Humpty Dumplings
• Hundred Headed IPA
• Hunger™ Sauce
• Ice Island Long Tea
• Ice-Cold Aluminum Necklace
• Ice-Cold Beer Ring
• Ice-Cold Beerring
• Idol of Ak'gyxoth
• Iiti Kitty Gumdrop
• Iiti Kitty phone charm
• Illuminati earpiece
• Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration
• Inndya trading card
• Inner Strength
• Inner Wisdom
• Interview With You (a Vampire)
• Irish Coffee, English Heart
• Ish Kabibble
• Island Hurricane
• Island Landslide
• Island Thunderstorm
• Item #13
• Iunion Crown
• Jack-O-Lantern beer
• Jackhammer
• Jacob's rung
• Jamaican coffee
• Jamocha berry
• January's Garbage Tote
• Jarlsberg's earring
• Jarlsberg's key lime
• Jarlsberg's key lime pie
• Jarlsberg's pan (Cosmic portal mode)
• Jawmaster 2000™
• Jeans of Loathing
• Jefferson wings
• Jeppson's Malort
• Jerks' Health™ Magazine
• Jick's autograph
• Jick-o-User
• Jokester makeup
• Jolly Roger charrrm
• Jolly Roger charrrm bracelet
• Jumbo Dr. Lucifer
• June cleaver
• Jungle Juice
• Junior Adventurer's kit
• Junior Adventurer's merit badge
• Junk-Bond
• Jurassic Parka
• Kashmir sweater
• Keese berry
• Kelflar vest
• Kentucky-fried meat crossbow
• Kentucky-fried meat staff
• Kentucky-fried meat sword
• Kentucky-style derby
• Kevlar balloon
• Kiss the Knob apron
• Kissin' Cousins
• Kitty the Zmobie Basher trading card
• Knob Göblin lòve potion
• Knob Goblin Uberpants
• Knob Goblin deluxe scimitar
• Knob Goblin elite helm
• Knob Goblin elite pants
• Knob Goblin elite polearm
• Knob Goblin elite shirt
• Knob Goblin eyedrops
• Knob Goblin firecracker
• Knob Goblin harem pants
• Knob Goblin harem veil
• Knob Goblin learning pill
• Knob Goblin love potion
• Knob Goblin lunchbox
• Knob Goblin melon baller
• Knob Goblin nasal spray
• Knob Goblin pants
• Knob Goblin perfume
• Knob Goblin pet-buffing spray
• Knob Goblin scimitar
• Knob Goblin seltzer
• Knob Goblin sharpening spray
• Knob Goblin spatula
• Knob Goblin steroids
• Knob Goblin stink bomb
• Knob Goblin superseltzer
• Knob Goblin tongs
• Knob Goblin visor
• Knob Kitchen grab-bag
• Knob jelly donut
• Knob lo mein
• Knob mushroom
• Knob nuts
• Knob pasty
• Knob sausage
• Knob sausage stir-fry
• Knob shroomkabob
• Knob stir-fry
• Knob stroganoff
• Knob stuffed shells
• Knoll lo mein
• Knoll mushroom
• Knoll shroomkabob
• Knoll stir-fry
• KoL Con 12-gauge
• KoL Con 13 T-shirt
• KoL Con 13 snowglobe
• KoL Con 3-D Glasses
• KoL Con 8-Bit power bracelet
• KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat
• KoL Con IV Pole
• KoL Con Six Pack
• KoL Con X Bingo Card
• KoL Con X Treasure Map
• Kokomo Resort Brand Suntan Oil
• Kokomo Resort Chip
• Kokomo Resort Order Pad
• Kokomo Resort Pass
• Kramco Sausage-o-Matic™
• Krampus Horn
• Kremlin's Greatest Briefcase
• Kudzu salad
• LARP carp
• LCD game: Burger Belt
• LCD game: Food Eater
• LCD game: Garbage River
• LED block
• LED candle
• LOV Echinacea Bouquet
• LOV Elephant
• LOV Elixir #3
• LOV Elixir #6
• LOV Elixir #9
• LOV Emotionizer
• LOV Enamorang
• LOV Entrance Pass
• LOV Extraterrestrial Chocolate
• LT&T tattoo kit
• La Fantasma y La Oscuridad
• Lars the Cyberian
• Lava Miner's Daughter
• LavaCo™ Lamp housing
• Law of Averages
• Lazenby's Life Lesson
• Lazybones™ recliner
• Leapin' Trousers
• Left-Hand Man action figure
• Leonard's glasses
• Lepardner
• Let Me Be!
• Lewd Lemmy Hair Oil
• Li'l Businessman Kit
• License To Kill
• License to Chill
• Lil' Doctor™ bag
• Lil' Snowball Factory
• Little Crimson Book
• Living to Drink, Drinking to Live
• Loathing Legion abacus
• Loathing Legion can opener
• Loathing Legion chainsaw
• Loathing Legion corkscrew
• Loathing Legion defibrillator
• Loathing Legion double prism
• Loathing Legion electric knife
• Loathing Legion flamethrower
• Loathing Legion hammer
• Loathing Legion helicopter
• Loathing Legion jackhammer
• Loathing Legion kitchen sink
• Loathing Legion many-purpose hook
• Loathing Legion moondial
• Loathing Legion necktie
• Loathing Legion pizza stone
• Loathing Legion rollerblades
• Loathing Legion tape measure
• Loathing Legion tattoo needle
• Loathing Legion universal screwdriver
• Lobos Mints
• Lobster qua Grill
• Lockenstock™ sandals
• Locust
• Lollipop Drop
• Lolsipop
• London frog
• Lord of the Flies-sized fries
• Louder Than Bomb
• Loudmouth Larry Lamprey
• Lucky Lindy
• Lucky Strikes holo-record
• Lucky Surprise Egg
• Ludovico Pastaco
• Lumineux Limnio
• Lump-Stacking for Beginners
• LyleCo Contractor's Manual
• LyleCo premium magnifying glass
• LyleCo premium monocle
• LyleCo premium pickaxe
• LyleCo premium rope
• M-242
• MAHI fez
• MSG
• Mae West
• Mafia bow tie
• Mafia stogie
• Mafia violin case
• MagiMechTech NanoMechaMech
• Maiali Sifilitici Pinot Noir
• Mallomarbles
• Manetwich
• Mansquito Serum
• Mansquito's blood
• Manual of Numberology
• Manual of Transcendent Olfaction
• Map to Kokomo
• Mariner's Friend cough drops
• Mark I Steam-Hat
• Mark II Steam-Hat
• Mark III Steam-Hat
• Mark IV Steam-Hat
• Mark V Steam-Hat
• Mark of the Bugbear
• Mark of the Ghost
• Mark of the Skeleton
• Mark of the Vampire
• Mark of the Werewolf
• Mark of the Zombie
• Marltini
• Marvelous Unitard
• Marvin's marvelous pill
• Massive Manual of Marauder Mockery
• Maxing, Relaxing
• Maxwell's Silver Hammer
• MayDay™ contract
• Mayam Calendar
• Mayo de Mayo™ mayo
• Mayonex
• Mayor Ghost's cloak
• Mayor Ghost's gavel
• Mayor Ghost's khakis
• Mayor Ghost's sash
• Mayor Ghost's scissors
• Mayostat
• Mayozapine
• McLeod's Hard Haggis-Ade
• McMillicancuddy's Special Lager
• Meat Tenderizer is Murder
• Meat detector
• Meat maid
• Meat maid body
• Meat-inflating powder
• Mechamelion
• Medical Pastaco
• Meleegra™ pills
• Mer-kin begsign
• Mer-kin breastplate
• Mer-kin bunwig
• Mer-kin cancerstick
• Mer-kin cheatsheet
• Mer-kin cookiestove
• Mer-kin cooljuice
• Mer-kin digpick
• Mer-kin dragbelt
• Mer-kin eyedrops
• Mer-kin eyeglasses
• Mer-kin facecowl
• Mer-kin fastjuice
• Mer-kin finpaddle
• Mer-kin fitbrine
• Mer-kin foodbucket
• Mer-kin gladiator mask
• Mer-kin gladiator tailpiece
• Mer-kin hallpass
• Mer-kin healscroll
• Mer-kin hidepaint
• Mer-kin hookspear
• Mer-kin killscroll
• Mer-kin lipstick
• Mer-kin lunchbox
• Mer-kin mouthsoap
• Mer-kin paste
• Mer-kin pinkslip
• Mer-kin prayerbeads
• Mer-kin pressureglobe
• Mer-kin ragejuice
• Mer-kin rocksalt
• Mer-kin rollpin
• Mer-kin roundshield
• Mer-kin saltmint
• Mer-kin saltsquid
• Mer-kin sawdust
• Mer-kin scholar mask
• Mer-kin scholar tailpiece
• Mer-kin smartjuice
• Mer-kin sneakmask
• Mer-kin stopwatch
• Mer-kin strongjuice
• Mer-kin takebag
• Mer-kin thingpouch
• Mer-kin waistrope
• Mer-kin weaksauce
• Mer-kin wordquiz
• Mer-kin worktea
• Merc Core Field Manual: Intimidation Techniques
• Merc Core Field Manual: Sanity Maintenance
• Merc Core challenge coin
• Merc Core deployment orders
• Mesmereyes™ contact lenses
• Meteorite-Ade
• Mick's IcyVapoHotness Inhaler
• Mick's IcyVapoHotness Rub
• Microplushie: Bropane
• Microplushie: Dorkonide
• Microplushie: Ermahgerdic Acid
• Microplushie: Fauxnerditide
• Microplushie: Gothochondria
• Microplushie: Hippylase
• Microplushie: Hipsterine
• Microplushie: Hobomosome
• Microplushie: Otakulone
• Microplushie: Raverdrine
• Microplushie: Sororitrate
• Middle of the Road™ brand whiskey
• Milk Studs
• Mini-Crimbot crate
• MiniMechaElf Laser Punch Missile Launcher
• Miniborg Destroy-O-Bot
• Miniborg beeper
• Miniborg hiveminder
• Miniborg laser
• Miniborg stomper
• Miniborg strangler
• Mint Yulep
• Miserable Pie
• Miss Graves' vermouth
• Missing Eye Simulation Device
• Mixed Garbanzos and Chickpeas
• Mjolnir Jr.
• Mmm-brr! brand mouthwash
• Mob Penguin cellular phone
• Mob Penguin protection contract
• Mohawk wig
• Mohobo
• Mon Tiki
• Monstar energy beverage
• Moonds
• Moonthril Schnapps
• Morbidda trading card
• More Humanitini than Humanitini
• Morlock's Mark Bourbon
• Mornington crescent roll
• Morphan
• Mortimer's nostrum
• Morto Moreto
• Mountain Stream Code Black Alert
• Mountain Stream gastrique
• Mountain Stream soda
• Mr. Accessory
• Mr. Accessory Jr.
• Mr. Big's Wallet
• Mr. Burnsger
• Mr. Container
• Mr. Eh?
• Mr. Exploiter
• Mr. Haggis
• Mr. Joe's bangles
• Mr. Mediocrebar
• Mr. Shirt
• Ms. Accessory
• Mt. McLargeHuge oyster
• Mt. Noob Pale Ale
• Mu
• Mudflap-Girl Earring
• Mudflap-Girl Necklace
• Mudflap-Girl Ring
• Murderer's Punch
• Muschat
• Mustardigrade
• My First Paycheck envelope
• My Life of Crime, a Memoir
• Mylar balloon
• Mysterious Black Box
• Mysterious Blue Box
• Mysterious Green Box
• Mysterious Island iced tea
• Mysterious Red Box
• Mysterious Stranger
• N. O. Beer
• ND
• NG
• NPZR chemistry set
• Nadsat berry
• Napalm In The Morning™ candle
• Nardz energy beverage
• Nayztameetjoo trading card
• Necbro wafers
• Necrotelicomnicon
• Neuromancer
• Never Don't Stop Not Striving
• New Age healing crystal
• New Age hurting crystal
• New Cloaca-Cola
• New Zealand iced tea
• Newark
• Newbiesport™ backpack
• Newbiesport™ tent
• Nightmare Fuel
• Nightstalker perfume
• No Hats as Art
• Non-Euclidean Finance
• Northern pemmican
• Nose Ring of Putrescence
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter I
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter II
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter III
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter IV
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter V
• Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter VI
• Now You're Cooking With Grease
• Now and Earlier
• Nuclear Blastball
• Nursine
• O
• O'RLY manual
• Official Council Aide Pin
• Official Seal of Dreadsylvania
• Ogres and Oubliettes™ module
• Oh, the Humanitini
• Oil of Parrrlay
• Okee-Dokee soda
• Ol' Scratch's infernal pitchfork
• Ol' Scratch's stove door
• Olympic-sized Clan crate
• Omphalotus Omphaloskepsis mushroom
• Oppossum
• Orangemageddon wine cooler
• Orcish baseball cap
• Orcish cargo shorts
• Orcish frat-paddle
• Orcish meat locker
• Oreille Divisée brandy
• Oscus's flypaper pants
• Oscus's garbage can lid
• Oscus's neverending soda
• Othello's dagger
• Othello's handkerchief
• Othello's military jacket
• Otorian Battle Scar
• Ouija Board, Ouija Board
• Outer Wolf™ cologne
• P.B.L.T.
• PADL Phone
• PARTY HARD T-shirt
• PEEZ dispenser
• PVC staff
• Pack of Alice's Army Cards
• Pack of Alice's Army Foil Cards
• Pain Dip
• Paint A Vulgar Pitcher
• Panda outfit
• Para-Pop
• Party Planning on a Budget
• Party Tattoo™ gift certificate
• Party-in-a-Can™
• Pastaco shell
• Peaclock
• Peek-a-Boo!
• Pendant of Fire
• Pendant of Gargalesis
• Penultimate Fantasy chest
• Peppermint Pip Packet
• Periodical Paintbrush
• Petite Paintbrush
• Phil Collins
• Phlegethon
• Phonus Balonus
• Pick-O-Matic lockpicks
• Piddles
• Pillowbug
• Pimpsqueak
• Pine-Fresh air freshener
• PirateRealm guest pass
• PirateRealm membership packet
• Plague of Locusts
• Platinum HP-35 Calculator
• Platinum Yendorian Express Card
• PlexiPips
• Pneumo bar
• Pocket Professor memory chip
• Poison Oak trading card
• Poké-Gro fertilizer
• Pokëmann band-aid
• Polysniff Perfume
• Pop Art: a Guide
• Pork 'n' Pork 'n' Pork 'n' Beans
• Potion of Heroism
• Power-Guy 2000 holo-record
• Powerful Glove
• Prelude of Precision
• Pretty Predator Clawicure Kit
• Princess Rutabaga trading card
• Private Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Jacket
• Professor What T-Shirt
• Professor of Spelunkology
• Protects-Your-Junk
• Prunets
• Psycho From The Heat
• Psychotic Train wine
• Puffstone cigar
• Punching Potion
• Punchplanter
• Purple Beast energy drink
• Putrid Pendant
• Quaatorade™
• Quartet of Flare Masters Jacket
• Queue Du Coq cocktailcrafting kit
• Quiets-Your-Steps
• Rümpelstiltz
• R'lyeh
• ROM of Optimality
• Rad Lib
• Rad-B-Gone (1 lb.)
• Rad-Pro (1 oz.)
• Radberry Rip wine cooler
• Radio Free Baseball Cap
• Radio Free Jersey
• Radio KoL Antenna Ball
• Radio KoL Bottle Opener
• Radio KoL Coffee Mug
• Radio KoL Flashlight
• Radio KoL Keychain
• Radio KoL Maracas
• Radio KoL Patch
• Raggedy Hippy doll
• Rainbow Jello Mould
• Rainbow's Gravity
• Ralph IX cognac
• Ram's Face Lager
• Rattlin' Chains
• Really Expensive Jewelry and You
• Red Army camouflage kit
• Red Dwarf
• Red Fox glove
• Red Pill
• Red Roger's red left foot
• Red Roger's red left hand
• Red Roger's red right foot
• Red Roger's skull
• Red Rover BB gun
• Red Russian
• Red X Shield
• Redeye™ Eyedrops
• Regular Cloaca Cola
• Retenez L'Herbe Paté
• Rethinking Candy
• Retrospecs
• Riker's Search History
• Ring of Fire
• Ring of the Sewer Snake
• Rock Pops
• Rogue Windmill Rouge
• Roman Candelabra
• Roman sadnals
• Rompedores de Fantasmas
• Roo trading card
• Royal scepter
• Ruffalo
• S.A.V.E. flyer
• S.I.T. Course Completion Certificate
• S.L.E.I.G.H.B.E.L.L.S.
• S.S. Ticket
• S.T.L.T.
• SMOOCH bottlecap
• SMOOCH bracers
• SMOOCH breastplate
• SMOOCH codpiece
• SMOOCH kneepads
• SMOOCH soda
• SMOOCH spaulders
• SPF 451 lip balm
• STYX deodorant body spray
• Saison du Lune
• Salsa Caliente™ candle
• Salsa Libre
• Salsa de las Epocas
• Sangria de Menthe
• Sasq™ watch
• Satan hat
• Saturday Night Special
• Saucepanic
• Sazerorc
• Sazuruk-hai
• Scandalously Skimpy Bikini
• Scent of a Human™ candle
• Scepter of Loathing
• School of Hard Knocks Diploma
• Scorpion Bowl
• Scratch-and-Sniff Guide to Dinseylandfill
• Scuba Snack
• Seasonal Beret
• Senior LAAAAME merit badge
• Senior Mints
• Sensual Massage for Creeps
• Sept-Ember Censer
• Septapus summoning charm
• Sequestrian
• Serenity trading card
• Seven Loco
• Sexy Cosmo
• Shakespeare's Sister's Accordion
• Shantix™
• Sheila Take a Crossbow
• Shielding Potion
• Shivering Chèvre
• Shot of Kardashian Gin
• Shot of the Living Dead
• Shrieking Weasel holo-record
• Shrub's Premium Baked Beans
• Shrubble Bubble
• Shudder
• Siberian sunrise
• Silver Bullet beer
• Silver HP-35 Calculator
• Simepore slime
• Sinful Desires
• Single Alice's Army Foil
• Sister Accessory
• Site Alpha ID badge
• Sitrep berry
• Size XI Wizard's Robe
• Sizzling Sinner
• Sketcherz™
• Skipper's accordion
• Skull Punch
• Skullery Maid's Knee
• Skullhead's Screw
• Skully's hot chocolate
• Sledgehamster
• Slimebite
• Slimosa
• Slippery Knob
• Sloe Comfortable Zoo
• Sloe Comfortable Zoo on Fire
• Sloppy Jalopy
• Sloppy Seconds Diner Employee Handbook
• Slotter
• Slow Talkin' Elliot's dogtags
• Smart Bone Dust
• Smashmoth
• Smoldering Clover™ candle
• Smuggler's Punch
• Snarf berry
• Sneaky Pete's breath spray
• Sneaky Pete's key lime
• Sneaky Pete's key lime pie
• Sneaky Pete's leather jacket (collar popped)
• Snoutlet
• Snow Queen Crown
• Sockdollager
• Solstice Shield
• Sombrero De Vida
• SongBoom™ BoomBox
• SongBoom™ BoomBox Box
• Source terminal ASHRAM chip
• Source terminal CRAM chip
• Source terminal DIAGRAM chip
• Source terminal DRAM chip
• Source terminal GRAM chip
• Source terminal INGRAM chip
• Source terminal PRAM chip
• Source terminal SCRAM chip
• Source terminal SPAM chip
• Source terminal TRAM chip
• Source terminal TRIGRAM chip
• Source terminal file: compress.edu
• Source terminal file: cram.ext
• Source terminal file: critical.enh
• Source terminal file: damage.enh
• Source terminal file: dram.ext
• Source terminal file: duplicate.edu
• Source terminal file: familiar.ext
• Source terminal file: gram.ext
• Source terminal file: portscan.edu
• Source terminal file: pram.ext
• Source terminal file: protect.enq
• Source terminal file: spam.ext
• Source terminal file: stats.enq
• Source terminal file: substats.enh
• Source terminal file: tram.ext
• Source terminal file: turbo.edu
• Southern yam
• Souvenir Chopsticks
• Space Baby bawbaw
• Space Baby children's book
• Space Pirate Astrogation Handbook
• Space Tourist Phaser
• Space Tours Tripple
• Spacegate Initiative tattoo unit
• Spacegate diplomat's insignia
• Spacegate emergency disintegrator
• Spacegate military insignia
• Spacegate scientist's insignia
• Spaghetti with Moonballs
• Spam Witch sammich
• Spant eggs
• Spasmi Dolorosi Del Rene Champagne
• Spechunky bar
• Special Seasoning
• Special™ Sauce
• Spellbook: Drescher's Annoying Noise
• Spellbook: Singer's Faithful Ocelot
• Spellbook: Walberg's Dim Bulb
• Spelunker of Fortune
• Spelunker's Guild prize sack
• Spelunker's fedora
• Spelunker's khakis
• Spelunker's whip
• SpinMaster™ lathe
• Spirit Precipice
• Spooky Putty ball
• Spooky Putty leotard
• Spooky Putty mitre
• Spooky Putty monster
• Spooky Putty sheet
• Spooky Surprise Egg
• Spooky-Gro fertilizer
• Spring Break Beach "swimsuit"
• Spring Break Beach tattoo coupon
• Squat-Thrust Magazine
• Squib
• Stabonic scroll
• Staff of the Deepest Freeze
• Staff of the Walk-In Freezer
• Star Spawn
• Star of Bravery
• Steal This Candy
• Steam Card: DemonStar (#1)
• Steam Card: DemonStar (#2)
• Steam Card: DemonStar (#3)
• Steam Card: Dungeon Fist (#1)
• Steam Card: Dungeon Fist (#2)
• Steam Card: Dungeon Fist (#3)
• Steam Card: Jackass Plumber (#1)
• Steam Card: Jackass Plumber (#2)
• Steam Card: Jackass Plumber (#3)
• Steam Card: Meteoid (#1)
• Steam Card: Meteoid (#2)
• Steam Card: Meteoid (#3)
• Steam Card: Space Trip (#1)
• Steam Card: Space Trip (#2)
• Steam Card: Space Trip (#3)
• Stembridge sidearm
• Stemonitis Staticus mushroom
• Stephen's secret formula
• Stick-Knife of Loathing
• Stone Golem pebbles
• Stooper
• Straypler
• Strikes Again Bigmouth
• Strix stix
• Strong, Silent Type
• Stupid University Diploma
• Suffering Sinner
• Sugar Cog
• Summer Nights
• Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword
• Super Magic Power Sword X
• Super Weight-Gain 9000
• Superdrifter holo-record
• Superhero Reboots
• Supernova Champagne
• Suppurating Sinner
• Swabbie™ swab
• Swedish coffee
• Swedish massage fish
• Sweet Sword
• Swizzler
• TΤ◊lisman of Baiø‡
• T.U.R.D.S. Key
• TI-9000 calculator
• TRIO cup of beer
• Taco Dan's Basic Taco Dan Taco
• Taco Dan's Super Taco-Riffic Taco Sauce!
• Taco Dan's Taco Fish Fish Taco
• Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chillacious Churro
• Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chimichangarita
• Taco Dan's Taco Stand Flier
• Taco Dan's Taco Stand Taco
• Take Eleven Bar
• Tales from the Fireside
• Tales of Spelunking
• Tales of Western Braggadoccio
• Tales of a Kansas Toymaker
• Talisman of Baio
• Talisman of Bakula
• Tallowcreme Halloween Pumpkin
• Tapioc berry
• Tasty Fun Good rice candy
• Tea, Earl Grey, Hot
• Telltale™ rubber heart
• Temporal Tempera Tube
• Temps Tempranillo
• Tequiz Navidad
• Tesla's Electroplated Beans
• Texas tea
• That 70s Cologne
• The Art of Slapfighting
• The Author's ink
• The Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones
• The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder
• The Beast Within™ candle
• The Big Book of Communism
• The Big Book of Pirate Insults
• The Bomb
• The Chill of the Wild
• The Cocktail Shaker
• The Cooler Out of Space
• The Crown of Ed the Undying
• The Emperor's new cookie
• The Encyclopedia of Fruit
• The Encyclopedia of Fruit (used)
• The Fingernail of the Thing in the Basement
• The Firegate Tapes
• The Fun-Guy Cold Weather Bartender's Guide
• The Grand Poo-Bah trading card
• The Groose in the Hoose
• The Imploded World
• The Inquisitor's unidentifiable object
• The Jokester's gun
• The Jokester's pants
• The Jokester's wig
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 1
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 3
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 4
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 5
• The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 6
• The Joy of Wassailing
• The Kloop in the Coop
• The Landscaper's leafblower
• The Lost Comb
• The Lost Glasses
• The Lost Pill Bottle
• The Lot's engagement ring
• The Mad Liquor
• The Necbronomicon
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 1
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 3
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 4
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 5
• The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 6
• The Nose Knows, A Guide to Smells
• The Nuge's favorite crossbow
• The Pigs holo-record
• The Plumber's mushroom stew
• The Ring
• The Snake trading card
• The Snitch's Manifesto
• The Spirit of Giving
• The Superconductor's CPU
• The Sword in the Steak
• The Thorax's Codex of Tormenting Plants
• The Western Look
• They liver
• They liver popsicle
• Thinknerd Blind-Packed Toy
• Thinknerd T-Shirt
• Thinknerd T-shirt grab bag
• Third Base
• This Charming Flan
• Thorny Toad trading card
• Thriller Ice
• Thunkula's drinking cap
• Tickle-Me Emilio
• Tiger-lily's milk
• Tiki lighter
• Time Bandit Time Towel
• Time Cape
• Time Cloak
• Time Lord Badge of Honor
• Time-Spinner
• To Build an Igloo
• Toddler-sized Dragon Costume
• Tom's of the Spanish Main Toothpaste
• Too Cold to Hold: How to Be Cool - A Memoir (read)
• Toot Oriole care package
• Totally Gay Claymore
• Trader Olaf's Exotic Stinkbeans
• Trafikoan
• Trainbot autoassembly module
• Trainbot circuitry
• Trainbot harness
• Trainbot linkages
• Trainbot luggage hook
• Trainbot optics
• Trainbot plating
• Trainbot radar monocle
• Trainbot servomotors
• Trainbot slag
• Trainbot tubing
• Transylvania Sling
• Trash, a Memoir
• Travels with Jerry
• Treads of Loathing
• Tremella Tarantella mushroom
• Trivial Avocations Card: What?
• Trivial Avocations Card: When?
• Trivial Avocations Card: Where?
• Trivial Avocations Card: Who?
• Trivial Avocations board game
• Trollhouse cookies
• Tropical Crimbo Hat
• Tropical Crimbo Shorts
• Tropical Crimbo Sword
• Trout Fishing in Loathing
• Tuesday's ruby
• Turpin
• Turtive
• Turtle Bowl
• Twelve Night Energy
• Twitching Television Tattoo
• Typical Tavern swill
• Ultimate Mind Destroyer
• Ultra Mega Sour Ball
• Ultracolor™ shirt
• Ultrasoldier Serum
• Uncle Crimbo's Rations
• Uncle Crimbo's hat
• Uncle Greenspan's Bathroom Finance Guide
• Uncle Hobo's stocking cap
• Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix
• Uncle Romulus
• Unconscious Collective Dream Jar
• Underworld acorn
• Underworld flail
• Underworld truncheon
• Ungulant
• Universal Seasoning
• Unkillable Skeleton's breastplate
• Unkillable Skeleton's restless leg
• Unkillable Skeleton's sawsword
• Unkillable Skeleton's shinguards
• Unkillable Skeleton's skullcap
• Unmotivator: Crashed Meat Car
• Unmotivator: Crashed Orca
• Unmotivator: Success Warrior
• Unspeakable Earring
• Unspeakachu
• Uovo Marcio Shiraz
• Ur-Donut
• VYKEA blood rune
• VYKEA bracket
• VYKEA dowel
• VYKEA frenzy rune
• VYKEA hex key
• VYKEA instructions
• VYKEA lightning rune
• VYKEA meatballs
• VYKEA plank
• VYKEA rail
• VYKEA woadpaint
• Val-U Brand Every Bean Salad
• Valentine
• Valentine's Day cake
• Vamprey
• Van der Graaf helmet
• Vaporpoise
• Vaso De Agua trading card
• Velvet Veil
• Venus flytrap
• Vial of jus de larmes
• Vicar's Tutu
• Victor's Spoils
• Vivian's Vitamin
• Vodka Matryoshka
• Voluminous Radio Hat
• Voluminous Radio Pants
• Voluminous Radio Sneakers
• Vulgure
• WA
• Waifuton
• Wal-Mart "diamond" ring
• Wal-Mart nametag
• Wal-Mart overalls
• Wal-Mart snowglobe
• Wal-Mart tattoo kit
• Wand of Oscus
• Warehouse 23 bling
• Warehouse 23 crate
• Warm Subject gift certificate
• Warms-Your-Tush
• Wax Flask
• Way More Tears™ pepper spray
• Wendtigo
• Western Slang Vol. 1: Violence
• Western Slang Vol. 2: Cooking
• Western Slang Vol. 3: Fraud
• Whatsian Ionic Pliers
• Whenchamacallit bar
• White Chocolate Golem Seeds
• White Citadel burger
• White Citadel fries
• White Hyborian
• Whoompa Fur Pants
• Wickers bar
• Winifred's whistle
• Wint-O-Fresh mint
• Woldo trading card
• Wolfman Nardz
• Work is a Four Letter Sword
• Workytime Tea
• World's Blackest-Eyed Peas
• Wrecked Generator
• Wrotz
• Wullabye
• X
• X-37 gun
• Xiblaxian 5D printer
• Xiblaxian alloy
• Xiblaxian cache locator simcode
• Xiblaxian circuitry
• Xiblaxian crystal
• Xiblaxian direct marketing simcode
• Xiblaxian encrypted political prisoner
• Xiblaxian holo-bowtie
• Xiblaxian holo-buddy simcode
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: residence cube
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: space whiskey
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: stealth cowl
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: stealth trousers
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: stealth vest
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: ultraburrito
• Xiblaxian holo-schematic: xeno-goggles
• Xiblaxian holo-training simcode
• Xiblaxian holo-wrist-puter simcode
• Xiblaxian polymer
• Xiblaxian stealth cowl
• Xiblaxian stealth trousers
• Xiblaxian stealth vest
• Xlyinia's notebook
• Ye Olde Bawdy Limerick
• Ye Olde Meade
• Ye Olde Medieval Insult
• Ye Olde Navy Fleece
• Ye Wizard's Shack snack voucher
• Yeg's Motel alarm clock
• Yeg's Motel ashtray
• Yeg's Motel disposable razor
• Yeg's Motel hand soap
• Yeg's Motel minibar key
• Yeg's Motel mouthwash
• Yeg's Motel pillow mint
• Yeg's Motel sewing kit
• Yeg's Motel stationery
• Yeg's Motel toothbrush
• Yolo™ chocolates
• Yorick
• Young Man's Cargo Load
• Young Man's Crew Sequester
• Yuleviathan necklace
• Yummy Tummy bean
• Z-Bone steak
• Ze™ goggles
• Zim Merman's guitar
• Zombo's shoulder blade
• Zombo's skull ring
• Zoodriver
• Zu Mannkäse Dienen
• [reuse me]
• a bug's lymph
• a butt tuba
• a little sump'm sump'm
• a suspicious address
• abandoned candy
• abominable blubber
• abominable snowcone
• abstraction: action
• abstraction: category
• abstraction: certainty
• abstraction: comprehension
• abstraction: joy
• abstraction: motion
• abstraction: perception
• abstraction: purpose
• abstraction: sensation
• abstraction: thought
• acceptable bagel
• acceptable mayolus
• accidental mutton
• accord ion
• accordion file
• accordionoid rocca
• acid-squirting flower
• acoustic guitarrr
• actual blood sausage
• actual reality goggles
• actual tapas
• adder
• adder bladder
• adhesive tape dolly
• aerogel attache case
• aerosolized aerogel
• affordable teak perch
• agnolotti arboli
• agua de vida
• airblaster gun
• airborne mutagen
• airplane charter: Conspiracy Island
• airplane tattoo
• alarm accordion
• albatross necklace
• alien animal goo
• alien drugs
• alien force field disruptor bean
• alien hologram projector
• alien meat
• alien plant goo
• alien plant sample
• alien protein powder
• alien sandwich
• alien source code printout
• alien zoological sample
• all-purpose cleaner
• all-purpose flower
• all-year sucker
• almost-dead walkie-talkie
• alpha-mail pants
• alphabet gum
• alpine watercolor set
• amber aviator shades
• ammonite candy mold
• ammonite fossil
• amok pudding
• amok putter
• amphibious tophat
• amulet of extreme plot significance
• ancient Elf dessert spoon
• ancient Magi-Wipes
• ancient calendar
• ancient calendar fragment
• ancient frozen dinner
• ancient hot dog wrapper
• ancient ice cream scoop
• ancient meat
• ancient medicinal herbs
• ancient pills
• ancient poisoned dart
• ancient protein powder
• ancient redwood
• ancient spice
• ancient stone fist
• ancient stone head
• ancient turtle shell
• ancient turtle shell helmet
• ancient turtle shell powder
• ancient unspeakable fruitcake
• ancient vinyl coin purse
• anemone nematocyst
• anemone sauce
• anemoney clip
• angel-food cake
• angry agate
• angry inch
• animal part cracker
• anise-flavored venom
• ankleweights
• annealed drippy orb
• anniversary balloon
• anniversary balsa wood socks
• anniversary burlap belt
• anniversary chutney sculpture
• anniversary concrete fedora
• anniversary pewter cape
• anniversary safety glass vest
• anniversary tiny latex mask
• annoying pitchfork
• ant agonist
• ant antidepressant
• ant hoe
• ant pick
• ant pitchfork
• ant rake
• ant sickle
• anti-anti-antidote
• anti-burn cream
• anti-creep cream
• anti-freeze cream
• anti-goosebump cream
• anti-odor cream
• anti-pain cream
• anticheese
• antimatter wad
• antique 8-Bit Power magazine
• antique Canadian lantern
• antique accordion
• antique beer
• antique bottle of cough syrup
• antique bottle opener
• antique greaves
• antique hand mirror
• antique helmet
• antique machete
• antique packet of ketchup
• antique pair of blue jeans
• antique shield
• antique souvenir drawing
• antique spear
• antique spyglass
• antique tacklebox
• apathetic lizardman doll
• aquamariner's necklace
• aquamariner's ring
• aquaviolet jub-jub bird
• arcanoferric housing
• arm buzzer
• armgun
• armored prawn
• around the world
• arrow'd heart balloon
• arrowgram
• arrrgyle socks
• arse-a'fire elixir
• arse-shooting crossbow
• artisanal limoncello
• asbestos apron
• asbestos crossbow
• asbestos crossbow string
• asbestos helmet turtle
• asbestos meat stack
• asbestos staff
• asbestos stick
• asbestos sword
• asbestos sword hilt
• asbestos thermos
• ash soda
• asparagus knife
• asparagus lo mein
• asparagus stir-fry
• aspirin
• asteroid belt
• astral mushroom
• astronaut pants
• atomic vector plotter
• attention spanner
• attorney's badge
• augmented El Vibrato drone
• augmented-reality shades
• august scepter
• autocalliope
• automatic catapult
• automatic wine thief
• autumn breeze
• autumn dollar
• autumn leaf
• autumn years wisdom
• autumn-spice donut
• auxiliary backbone
• avatar of the Unconscious Collective
• aviator goggles
• awful poetry journal
• bätzle
• baby bark scorpion
• baby cuddlefish
• baby killer bee
• baby oil shooter
• baby rigging snake
• babycakes
• backup camera
• backwoods banjo
• backwoods screwdriver
• baconstone
• baconstone bracelet
• baconstone earring
• baconstone pendant
• baconstone ring
• baconstone-handled sixgun
• bad rum and good cola
• bad vibroknife
• badass pie
• badger badge
• bag of Cheat-Os
• bag of GORF
• bag of GORP
• bag of QWOP
• bag of W&Ws
• bag of airline peanuts
• bag of foreign bribes
• bag of gross foreign snacks
• bag of lard
• bag of many confections
• bag of park garbage
• bag of pygmy blood
• bag of random words
• bag of sausage links
• bag of unfinished business
• bagged stuffed "L"
• baggie of powdered sugar
• baggie of regular-sized tardigrades
• baked stuffing
• bakelite-covered bacon
• balaclava
• balaclava baklava
• balanced antler
• ball
• ball-in-a-cup
• balloon helmet
• balloon shield
• balloon sword
• ballpark hot daub
• ballroom blintz
• baloney rotgut
• balsa plank
• bamboo bokuto
• banana
• banana candle
• banana cream pie
• banana daiquiri
• banana milkshake
• banana peel
• banana smoothie
• banana spritzer
• banana supersucker
• bananagate
• bananarama bangle
• baneful bandolier
• banjo kazoo mount
• banjo strings
• baobab sap
• bar of freeze-dried water
• bar skin
• bar whip
• barbed-wire fence
• bargain flash powder
• baritone accordion
• bark rootbeer
• barnacle-encrusted sweater
• barrel beryl
• barrel beryl choker
• barrel beryl nose ring
• barrel beryl ring
• barrel cracker
• barrel gun
• barrel-aged eggnog
• barrel-aged martini
• barrrnacle
• barskin buckler
• barskin cloak
• barskin hat
• barskin loincloth
• barskin tent
• bartender skull
• bartender-in-the-box
• bartender-skull-in-the-box
• basaltamander buckler
• basaltamander tongue
• basic martini
• basic meat crossbow
• basic meat fez
• basic meat foon
• basic meat helmet
• basic meat kilt
• basic meat pants
• basic meat skirt
• basic meat spork
• basic meat staff
• basic meat sword
• basking robin
• bastard baster
• bat guano
• bat haggis
• bat hat
• bat whip
• bat wing
• bat wing kabob
• bat wing stir-fry
• bat wings
• bat-ass leather jacket
• bat-shaped Crimboween cookie
• batarang
• batblade
• batgut
• battered Crimbo Crate
• battered hubcap
• battery (9-Volt)
• battery (lantern)
• battery-powered drill
• battoo kit
• bazooka cozy
• bazookafish bubble gum
• beach ball marble
• beach glass bead
• beach glass necklace
• bean burrito
• beanbag chair
• bear claw
• beard incense
• beastly paste
• beaten-up Chucks
• beautiful soup
• beaver punch (cherry)
• beaver punch (papaya)
• beaver punch (peach)
• beaver spear
• beavermouth
• bed of coals
• beefy fish meat
• beefy pill
• beer basted brat
• beer bong
• beer cartilage
• beer goggles
• beer helmet
• beer lens
• beer-a-pult
• beer-battered accordion
• beer-soaked mop
• beertini
• beery blood
• beet
• beet-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
• beetle antenna
• beggin' cologne
• begpwnia
• beholed bedsheet
• beige clambroth marble
• bejeweled accordion strap
• bejeweled cufflinks
• bejeweled pledge pin
• belemnite candy mold
• belemnite fossil
• bell-shaped Crimbo cookie
• bellhop bell
• bellhop's hat
• belt of Ogrekind
• bent scrap metal
• berries of suffering
• berry-infused sake
• best joke ever
• bezoar ring
• bi-lateral logic compressor
• big bad voodoo mask
• big bass drum
• big boom
• big bumboozer marble
• big dribbly candle
• big hot pepper
• big ol' trophy
• big red button
• big red clown nose
• big rock
• big stick
• big stirring stick
• bigger stick
• bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme
• bindle of joy
• bindlestocking
• bird rib
• birdbone corset
• birdybug antenna
• birthday candle
• birthday party jellybean cheesecake
• bishop cookie
• bit-o-cactus
• bite-me-red lipstick
• bitter pill
• black & tan
• black BRICKO brick
• black and white cracker
• black belt
• black blade
• black brandy
• black candy heart
• black catseye marble
• black cherry soda
• black cloak
• black cowboy hat
• black eye shadow
• black eyedrops
• black facepaint
• black forest cake
• black forest ham
• black friar's tonsure
• black gallstone
• black gold
• black greaves
• black helmet
• black kettle drum
• black label
• black lotus
• black mana
• black paisley oyster egg
• black pension check
• black pepper
• black picnic basket
• black pixel
• black plastic oyster egg
• black polka-dot oyster egg
• black pudding
• black sheepskin diploma
• black shield
• black snake skin
• black snowcone
• black spot
• black striped oyster egg
• black sword
• black tear
• black-and-blue light
• blackberry
• blackberry combat boots
• blackberry galoshes
• blackberry moccasins
• blackberry polite
• blackberry slippers
• blammer
• blank fudge mold
• blank prescription sheet
• blank white card
• blended frozen swill
• blended frozen swill with a fly in it
• blessed rustproof +2 gray dragon scale mail
• blind-packed capsule toy
• blind-packed die-cast metal toy
• blob of Alphredo™
• blob of acid
• blob of wood glue
• blob-shaped Crimbo cookie
• blood and blood
• blood flower
• blood kiwi
• blood roll-up
• blood sausage
• blood snowcone
• blood-drive sticker
• blood-faced volleyball
• blood-red mushroom wine
• blood-soaked sponge cake
• bloodied surgical dungarees
• bloodstain stick
• bloodstick
• bloody clown pants
• bloody mary
• blowdart
• blown-out speaker cone
• blue canary nightlight
• blue grass
• blue lava globs
• blue mana
• blue oyster badge
• blue paisley oyster egg
• blue pixel
• blue pixel potion
• blue plasma ball
• blue plastic oyster egg
• blue plate
• blue polka-dot oyster egg
• blue potion
• blue pumps
• blue raspberry troll doll
• blue shell
• blue snowcone
• blue striped oyster egg
• blue suede shoes
• blue tulip
• blue velvet cake
• blue-frosted astral cupcake
• blueberry muffin
• blundarrrbus
• blunt cat claw
• blunt icepick
• bobble-hip hula elf doll
• bobcat grenade
• bodyguard badge
• bodyslam
• boilermaker
• boilgun
• boiling broth
• boiling seal blood
• bolder boulder
• bomb of unknown origin
• bone abacus
• bone and arrows
• bone aperitif
• bone bandoneon
• bone bons
• bone chips
• bone collar
• bone crusher
• bone flour
• bone flute
• bone meal
• bone rattle
• bone spurs
• boneana hammock
• bonedanna
• bonerang
• boning knife
• bonsai tree
• book of matches
• boot flask
• boot plant
• booty chest charrrm
• booty chest charrrm bracelet
• booze bindle
• booze mailing list
• boozebomb
• borg sock monkey
• boring spaghetti
• borrowed time
• bottle of Blank-Out
• bottle of Bloodweiser
• bottle of Calcutta Emerald
• bottle of Cochon Noir
• bottle of Crème de Fugu
• bottle of Crimbognac
• bottle of Definit
• bottle of Domesticated Turkey
• bottle of Evermore
• bottle of Fishhead 900-Day IPA
• bottle of Greedy Dog
• bottle of Jorge Sinsonte
• bottle of Lambada Lambic
• bottle of Monsieur Bubble
• bottle of Mystic Shell
• bottle of Old Pugilist
• bottle of Ooze-O
• bottle of Pete's Sake
• bottle of Pinot Renoir
• bottle of Professor Beer
• bottle of Race Car Red
• bottle of Rapier Witbier
• bottle of Red-Out
• bottle of Sanguiovese
• bottle of Vangoghbitussin
• bottle of alcohol
• bottle of anís
• bottle of antifreeze
• bottle of black cat tonic
• bottle of bubbles
• bottle of clam juice
• bottle of cooking sherry
• bottle of dark rhum
• bottle of drinkin' gas
• bottle of extra-dark rhum
• bottle of extra-strength melodramamine
• bottle of fire
• bottle of fruity "wine"
• bottle of gregnadigne
• bottle of laundry sherry
• bottle of lighter fluid
• bottle of limeade
• bottle of melodramamine
• bottle of moontan lotion
• bottle of novelty hot sauce
• bottle of peppermint schnapps
• bottle of perfume
• bottle of pirate juice
• bottle of popskull
• bottle of realpagne
• bottle of rhinoceros hormones
• bottle of sake
• bottle of sea wine
• bottle of sewage schnapps
• bottle of single-barrel whiskey
• bottle of super-extra-dark rhum
• bottle of ultravitamins
• bottle of wine
• bottle opener belt buckle
• bottlecap turtle
• bottled inspiration
• bottled swamp gas
• boulder
• bounty-hunting helmet
• bouquet of circular saw blades
• bow
• bow staff
• bowl full of jelly
• bowl of Bounty-Os
• bowl of Jeal-O
• bowl of cottage cheese
• bowl of eyeballs
• bowl of fishysoisse
• bowl of lucky charms
• bowl of maggots
• bowl of marinade
• bowl of mernudo
• bowl of mummy guts
• bowl of oriole's nest soup
• bowl of prescription candy
• bowl of rye sprouts
• bowl of topioca
• bowlegged pants
• bowler
• box
• box of Dweebs
• box of Familiar Jacks
• box of Pokëmann band-aids
• box of hammers
• box of hickory chips
• box turtle
• box-in-the-box
• box-in-the-box-in-the-box
• boxcar turtle
• boxed champagne
• boxed gumball machine
• boxing glove
• boxing glove on a spring
• brain-meltingly-hot chicken wings
• brains casserole
• brainwave-controlled unicorn horn
• brainy skull
• bran muffin
• brand new key
• brass Dreadsylvanian flask
• brass abacus
• brass bung spigot
• brass crank handle
• brass dorsal fin
• brass gear
• brass stinger
• brass turkey knuckles
• brazen bracelet
• bread basket
• bread line
• bread man
• bread mold
• bread pie
• bread roll
• breadchucks
• breaded beer
• breadwand
• breakfast mess
• breakfast miracle
• breath mint
• brick of sand
• brigand brittle
• brilliant oyster egg
• brine
• briny vinegar
• brittle plastic handle
• broberry brogurt
• brocolate brogurt
• broken BRICKO brick
• broken carburetor
• broken cellular phone
• broken chocolate pocketwatch
• broken clock
• broken glass grenade
• broken high-temperature mining drill
• broken skull
• broken sword
• broken warbear gyrocopter
• bronze
• bronze breastplate
• bronze handcuffs
• bronze polish
• bronzed locust
• brown crock marble
• brown felt tophat
• brown paper bag mask
• brown paper pants
• brown pirate pants
• brown pixel
• brown sugar cane
• browser cookie
• buñuelos Jaliscos
• bubble bauble bow
• bubble-wrap simulator
• bubble-wrap simulator (half broken)
• bubble-wrap simulator (one broken button)
• bubble-wrap simulator (one button left)
• bubblegum heart
• bubblewrap bottlecap turtleban
• bubblewrap crossbow
• bubblewrap ore
• bubblewrap staff
• bubblewrap sword
• bubblin' chemistry solution
• bubblin' crude
• bubbling tempura batter
• bubbly potion
• bucket of ancient Vampyre blood
• bucket of anniversary lard
• bucket of honey
• bucket of wine
• buckler buckle
• buckyball
• buffalo blade
• buffed alien drugs
• bug juice
• bug paste
• bugbear beanie
• bugbear bungguard
• bugbear detector
• bugbear purification pill
• bugbear-smiting sword
• bugged bön±Ã©t
• bugged balaclava
• bugged beanie
• bullet necklace
• bullet-proof corduroys
• bumblebee marble
• bunch of bananas
• bunch of sea grapes
• bunch of square grapes
• bundle of "fragrant" herbs
• bungle in the jungle
• buoybottoms
• burglar/sleep mask
• burning newspaper
• burnt flower
• burnt stick
• burrowgrub hive
• bus pass
• butterfly knife
• button rouge
• buzzard feather
• buzzing mushroom wine
• cabbage-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
• cabooze
• cactus fruit
• cactus monocle
• caipifruta
• calavera concertina
• calle de miel
• calle de miel with a fly in it
• calm attention-deficit demon
• camouflage T-shirt
• campfire baked potato
• campfire beans
• campfire coffee
• campfire hot dog
• campfire s'more
• campfire smoke
• campfire stew
• can cannon
• can of Adultwitch™
• can of Binarrrca
• can of Brütalbräu
• can of CRIMBCOLA
• can of Drooling Monk
• can of Ghuol-B-Gone™
• can of Impetuous Scofflaw
• can of Minions-Be-Gone
• can of Red Minotaur
• can of Swiller
• can of black paint
• can of cherry-flavored sterno
• can of depilatory cream
• can of drain cleaner
• can of fake snow
• can of franks 'n' beans
• can of maces
• can of mixed everything
• can of spinach
• can of starch
• can of sterno
• can of the cheapest beer
• can opener
• can-can-in-a-can
• can-shaped gelatinous cranberry sauce
• candied almond
• candied bolts
• candied kobold
• candied lime
• candied nuts
• candied pecan
• candied sweet potatoes
• candied yam pinky ring
• candied yams
• candy UFOs
• candy brain
• candy cane
• candy cane candygram
• candy cane sword cane
• candy carrot
• candy carrot cake
• candy chalk
• candy cigarette
• candy crayons
• candy dog collar
• candy dress shoes
• candy harmonica
• candy kneecapping stick
• candy knife
• candy knuckles
• candy mailing list
• candy mountain oyster
• candy necktie
• candy skeleton
• candy stake
• candy stick
• candycaine powder
• cane-mail pants
• cane-mail shirt
• cannonball charrrm
• cannonball charrrm bracelet
• cannonbomb
• canopic jar
• canteen of eggnog
• canteen of wine
• cap gun
• capacitor relay
• capped blue lava bottle
• capped green lava bottle
• capped red lava bottle
• carbon nanotube frame
• carbonated soy milk
• carbonated water lily
• carbonite visor
• card sleeve
• cardboard box turtle
• cardboard crossbow
• cardboard katana
• cardboard ore
• cardboard staff
• cardboard sword
• cardboard wakizashi
• caret
• carnivorous potted plant
• carob brownies
• carob cannon
• carob chunk cookies
• carob chunk noodles
• carob chunks
• carrot cake
• carrot cake precipice bar
• carrot claret
• carrot juice
• carrot nose
• carrot-on-a-stick
• carton of rotten eggs
• carton of snake milk
• cartoon harpoon
• cartoon heart
• cashew
• casino pass
• cast-iron legacy paddle
• cat appendix
• cat o' nine teeth
• catfish whiskers
• catgut
• catgut taco
• catskin buckler
• catskin cap
• catsup
• celestial au jus
• celestial carrot juice
• celestial olive oil
• celestial squid ink
• cement sandals
• cement shoes
• censored can label
• centipede eggs
• centurion helmet
• chain-mail monokini
• chainsaw chain
• chakra malt
• chakra sludge
• chakra-mental wine
• chalk chunks
• chamoisole
• chaos butterfly
• chaos popcorn
• charged magnet
• charisma potion
• charming flute
• charpuce jub-jub bird
• charrrm bracelet
• cheap Chinese beer
• cheap cigar butt
• cheap clip-on ninja tie
• cheap elven gloves
• cheap plastic blowgun
• cheap studded belt
• cheap sunglasses
• cheer extractor
• cheer-o-gram
• cheerful Crimbo sweater
• cheerful antler hat
• cheerful pajama pants
• cheesy eagle sauce
• cheezburger
• chef skull
• chef's hat
• chef-in-the-box
• chef-skull-in-the-box
• cherry
• cherry bomb
• cherry pie
• chest of "pirate gold"
• chewable paper
• chewing gum on a string
• chicle de salchicha
• chiffon carbage
• chiffon lemon
• child-sized dracula cloak
• children of the candy corn
• chintzy accordion pin
• chintzy disco ball pendant
• chintzy noodle ring
• chintzy saucepan earring
• chintzy seal pendant
• chintzy turtle brooch
• chipotle wasabi cilantro aioli
• chiptune guitar
• chisel
• chitin powder
• chitin powder paste
• chitinous pod
• chlorine crystal
• chloroform rag
• chlorophyll paste
• choco-Crimbot
• chocolate "Phoenix"
• chocolate Ogre Chieftain
• chocolate Spider Queen
• chocolate bowtie
• chocolate chip muffin
• chocolate cigar
• chocolate covered ping-pong ball
• chocolate cow bone
• chocolate disco ball
• chocolate filthy lucre
• chocolate frosted sugar bomb
• chocolate leash
• chocolate pasta spoon
• chocolate pocketwatch
• chocolate rabbit's foot
• chocolate saucepan
• chocolate seal-clubbing club
• chocolate spurs
• chocolate stolen accordion
• chocolate-covered caviar
• chocolate-covered diamond-studded roses
• chocolate-covered loofah
• chocolate-covered scarab beetle
• chocolate-stained collar
• chocomotive
• chocotini
• chopsticks
• chorizo brownies
• chorizo taco
• chrome crossbow
• chrome crossbow string
• chrome helmet turtle
• chrome meat stack
• chrome staff
• chrome stick
• chrome sword
• chrome sword hilt
• chunk of depleted Grimacite
• chunk of hot iron
• chunk of rock salt
• cigar box turtle
• cigarette lighter
• cinnamon cannoli
• cinnamon machine oil
• cinnamon troll doll
• circle drum
• circular CRIMBCOOKIE
• citrus-infused sake
• classy monkey
• claw-held flag
• clear Russian
• clock-cleaning hammer
• clockwork bartender head
• clockwork bartender-head-in-the-box
• clockwork bartender-in-the-box
• clockwork chef head
• clockwork chef-head-in-the-box
• clockwork chef-in-the-box
• clockwork claws
• clockwork clockwise dome
• clockwork counterclockwise dome
• clockwork crossbow
• clockwork detective skull
• clockwork doohickey
• clockwork endoskeleton
• clockwork handle
• clockwork hat
• clockwork key
• clockwork maid
• clockwork maid head
• clockwork pants
• clockwork pirate skull
• clockwork rings
• clockwork rod
• clockwork shank
• clockwork sheet
• clockwork sphere
• clockwork spine
• clockwork staff
• clockwork sword
• clockwork thingamajig
• clockwork trench coat
• clockwork widget
• cloning kit
• closed-circuit pay phone
• cloudy potion
• clove-flavored lip balm
• clown hammer
• clown shoes
• clown skin
• clown whip
• clown wig
• clownskin belt
• clownskin buckler
• clownskin harness
• club necklace
• club of the five seasons
• clumsiness bark
• cluster of hops
• clutch of dodecapede eggs
• coal contact lenses
• coal dust
• coal paperweight
• coal shovel
• coal snakeskin
• coarse hemp socks
• cob of corn
• cocktail mushroom
• cocktail onion
• cocoa chondrule
• cocoa egg
• cocoa eggshell fragment
• cocoa of youth
• coconut bikini top
• coconut shell
• cod cape
• coffee sprite
• coffin lid
• cog
• cog and sprocket assembly
• cold and sour sauce
• cold cluster
• cold clusterbomb
• cold hi mein
• cold jelly
• cold mashed potatoes
• cold ninja mask
• cold nuggets
• cold powder
• cold seal sweat
• cold wad
• cold water bottle
• cold-filtered water
• collapsible baton
• collection of tiny spooky objects
• cologne of contempt
• colored-light "necklace"
• colorful plastic ball
• colorful toad
• colossal free-range mushroom
• comb jelly
• combat fan
• combat lover's locket
• comfy blanket
• comfy coffin
• commemorative war stein
• communal gobstopper
• communications windchimes
• complex alien plant sample
• complex mushroom wine
• complicated lock impression
• compression stocking
• computronic processing unit
• concentrated cooking
• concentrated cordial of concentration
• concentrated fish broth
• concentrated garbage juice
• concentrated magicalness pill
• concoction of clumsiness
• confiscated cell phone
• confiscated comic book
• confiscated love note
• confusing LED clock
• congratulatory cake
• conjured ice cream
• contract enforcement stick
• cookbookbat book
• cookie cookie
• cool cat claw
• cool cat elixir
• cool iron ingot
• cool jelly donut
• cool mint precipice bar
• cool mushroom
• cool mushroom casserole
• cool mushroom wine
• cool spore pod
• cool whip
• cooling iron breastplate
• cooling iron greaves
• cooling iron helmet
• copper ha'penny charrrm
• copper ha'penny charrrm bracelet
• cordial of concentration
• corn holder
• corncob pipe
• cornucopia
• cornuthaum
• corpse on the beach
• corpsedriver
• corpsetini
• correction fluid
• corroded breeches
• corrosive cowl
• corrupted bird DNA
• corrupted data
• corrupted marrow
• corrupted stardust
• cosmetic football
• cosmic lemonade
• cosmic paste
• costume rental shop
• costume sword
• cottage
• cotton candy cordial
• cotton candy plug
• counterfeit city
• cow poker
• cozy bazooka
• cozy scarf
• cozy scimitar
• crêepy mask
• crabsicle
• cracker
• cranberry cordial
• cranberry cylinder
• cranberry margarita (brackish)
• cranberry schnapps
• crappy brain
• crappy camera
• crappy waiter disguise
• crate of firebombs
• crayon shavings
• crazy hobo notebook
• cream of pointy mushroom soup
• cream pie
• cream stout
• creamsicle
• creepy doll head
• creepy ginger ale
• creepy nursery rhyme
• creepy voice box
• creepy voodoo doll
• crimsilion jub-jub bird
• croquet hedgehog
• crossbow string
• crowbar
• crowbarrr
• crown-shaped beanie
• crude crudités
• crude voodoo doll
• crudles
• cruelty-free wine
• crumpled felt fedora
• crunchy brush
• crushed steamer trunk
• crystal Crimbo platter
• crystal belt buckle
• crystal decanter
• crystal skeleton vodka
• crystal skull
• crystalline light bulb
• crystalline reamer
• crystallized memory
• cube of billiard chalk
• cubic zirconia
• cuckoo clock
• cuddly teddy bear
• cup of "tea"
• cup of hickory chicory
• cup of infinite pencils
• cup of lukewarm tea
• cup of primitive beer
• cupcake-in-a-cup
• curdflinger
• curmudgel
• cursed chocolate doubloon
• cursed magnifying glass
• cursed microwave
• cursed monkey's paw
• cursed pirate cutlass
• cursed pony keg
• cursed ring finger ring
• cursed scrunchie
• cursed tricorn hat
• cursed wishbone
• custard pie
• custom avatar form
• custom sixgun
• cute bow from beyond the stars
• cute meteoroid
• cute mushroom
• cyan seashell
• cyber-mattock
• cyborg doll
• cyborg stompin' boot
• cyclops eyedrops
• cylindrical mold
• cymbal syrup
• d10
• d12
• d20
• d4
• d6
• d8
• daddy shortlegs leg
• daily dungeon malware
• damp bar rag
• dance card
• dangerous jerkcicle
• dark baconstone ring
• dark hamethyst ring
• dark porquoise ring
• dark potion
• daub-breaker
• day-old beer
• deactivated MicroMechaMech
• deactivated RoboGoose
• deactivated mini-Trainbot
• dead guy's memento
• dead guy's piece of double-sided tape
• dead guy's watch
• dead lights pie
• dead meat bun
• deadfall branch
• deadly lampshade
• deadly nightshade
• death blossom
• debonair deboner
• decanter of fine Scotch
• decaying goldfish liver
• decaying wooden oar
• decaying wooden paddle
• decaying wooden pole
• decent brain
• deck of lewd playing cards
• deck of tropical cards
• decomposed boot
• deep six-shooter
• defective Golden Mr. Accessory
• defective skull
• dehydrated caviar
• delectable catalyst
• delectable fire ant
• delicious comfit?
• delicious noodles
• delicious salad
• delicious shimmering moth
• delicious spicy noodles
• delicious star salad
• delicious stinkbug
• delicious swamp muck
• deluxe fax machine
• deluxe layer cake
• demon buckler
• demon makeup kit
• demon skin
• demon whip
• demon-horned hat
• demonic cow's blood
• demonic paste
• demonic surgical gloves
• demonskin jacket
• demonskin trousers
• denastified haunch
• denim axe
• denim jacket
• dense meat crossbow
• dense meat stack
• dense meat staff
• dense meat sword
• dental pliers
• dented harmonica
• dented spoon
• deodorant
• depantsing bomb
• depleted Crimbonium football helmet
• depleted Grimacite astrolabe
• depleted Grimacite grappling hook
• depleted Grimacite gravy boat
• depleted Grimacite hammer
• depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick
• depleted Grimacite ninja mask
• depleted Grimacite shinguards
• depleted Grimacite weightlifting belt
• desiccated apricot
• designer handbag
• designer sweatpants
• desktop zen garden
• detective skull
• detective tattoo
• dethklok
• devil hair pasta
• devil's-food cake
• deviled egg
• devilish folio
• dew yoana lei
• dew yoana salacious lei
• diabolic pizza cube
• diamond necklace
• diamond-studded cane
• diamond-studded fronts
• diamondback skin
• didgeridooka
• digital underground potion
• dilapidated wizard hat
• dill
• diluted makeup
• dingy planks
• dinner roll
• dire fudgesicle
• dirt julep
• dirty martini
• dirty rigging rope
• disbelief suspenders
• discarded swimming trunks
• disco ball
• disco biscuit
• disco horoscope (Aquarius)
• disco horoscope (Aries)
• disco horoscope (Cancer)
• disco horoscope (Capricorn)
• disco horoscope (Gemini)
• disco horoscope (Leo)
• disco horoscope (Libra)
• disco horoscope (Pisces)
• disco horoscope (Sagittarius)
• disco horoscope (Scorpio)
• disco horoscope (Taurus)
• disco horoscope (Virgo)
• disco mask
• discocktail
• disease
• disembodied brain
• disembodied smile
• dishrag
• disintegrating quill pen
• disintegrating sheet music
• disintegrating spiky collar
• displaced fish
• disposable instant camera
• disposable lighter
• distention pill
• distilled fortified wine
• distressed denim pants
• disturbing fanfic
• divine blowout
• divine can of silly string
• divine champagne flute
• divine champagne popper
• divine cracker
• divine noisemaker
• do-it-yourself laser eye surgery kit
• dog ointment
• doll house
• doll-eye amulet
• dollar-sign bag
• dollhive
• dollop of barbecue sauce
• dolphin whistle
• donkey flipbook
• dope gangsta bling-bling
• dope wheels
• dorky glasses
• double barreled barrel gun
• double daisy
• double entendre
• double-barreled sling
• double-ice gum
• dove DNA
• drab sonata
• drafty drawers
• draggin' ball hat
• dragon snaps
• dragonfish caviar
• dread tarragon
• dreadful fedora
• dreadful glove
• dreadful roast
• dreadful sweater
• dreadlock whip
• dream of a dog
• dreaming Jung man
• dregs of a Crimbo cocktail
• dress pants
• dried face
• dried gelatinous cube
• drink chit
• drinks tray
• dripping meat crossbow
• dripping meat staff
• dripping meat sword
• drippy bezoar
• drippy bromide
• drippy candy bar
• drippy caviar
• drippy diadem
• drippy enzyme
• drippy flux
• drippy grub
• drippy ichor
• drippy khakis
• drippy nugget
• drippy orb
• drippy pigment
• drippy pilsner
• drippy plum(?)
• drippy salt
• drippy seed
• drippy shield
• drippy snail shell
• drippy staff
• drippy stake
• drippy stein
• drippy truncheon
• drive-by shooting
• drive-thru burger
• droll monocle
• dromedary drinking helmet
• drone self-destruct chip
• droopy doll eye
• drop of water-37
• droppable microphone
• dropped scrap of paper
• drug cocktail sauce
• druidic s'more
• drum of pomade
• drum of tommy ammo
• dry cleaning receipt
• dry martini
• dry noodles
• dry vodka martini
• drywall axe
• dubious loincloth
• dubious peppermint
• ducha de oro
• duck-on-a-string
• dueling banjo
• dueling turtle
• dull fish scale
• dungeoneer's dungarees
• dungeoneering kit
• dusty Crimbo crate
• dusty animal cranium
• dusty animal jawbone
• dusty animal pelvis
• dusty bottle of Marsala
• dusty bottle of Merlot
• dusty bottle of Muscat
• dusty bottle of Pinot Noir
• dusty bottle of Port
• dusty bottle of Zinfandel
• dusty bottle of blood
• dusty eighth caudal vertebra
• dusty eighth thoracic vertebra
• dusty eleventh thoracic vertebra
• dusty fifth caudal vertebra
• dusty fifth cervical vertebra
• dusty fifth lumbar vertebra
• dusty fifth thoracic vertebra
• dusty first caudal vertebra
• dusty first cervical vertebra
• dusty first lumbar vertebra
• dusty first thoracic vertebra
• dusty fourth caudal vertebra
• dusty fourth cervical vertebra
• dusty fourth lumbar vertebra
• dusty fourth thoracic vertebra
• dusty left clavicle
• dusty left eighth rib
• dusty left eleventh rib
• dusty left femur
• dusty left fibula
• dusty left fifth rib
• dusty left first front claw
• dusty left first rear claw
• dusty left first rib
• dusty left fourth front claw
• dusty left fourth rear claw
• dusty left fourth rib
• dusty left humerus
• dusty left kneecap
• dusty left ninth rib
• dusty left radius
• dusty left scapula
• dusty left second front claw
• dusty left second rear claw
• dusty left second rib
• dusty left seventh rib
• dusty left sixth rib
• dusty left tenth rib
• dusty left third front claw
• dusty left third rear claw
• dusty left third rib
• dusty left thumb
• dusty left tibia
• dusty left twelfth rib
• dusty left ulna
• dusty ninth caudal vertebra
• dusty ninth thoracic vertebra
• dusty right clavicle
• dusty right eighth rib
• dusty right eleventh rib
• dusty right femur
• dusty right fibula
• dusty right fifth rib
• dusty right first front claw
• dusty right first rear claw
• dusty right first rib
• dusty right fourth front claw
• dusty right fourth rear claw
• dusty right fourth rib
• dusty right humerus
• dusty right kneecap
• dusty right ninth rib
• dusty right radius
• dusty right scapula
• dusty right second front claw
• dusty right second rear claw
• dusty right second rib
• dusty right seventh rib
• dusty right sixth rib
• dusty right tenth rib
• dusty right third front claw
• dusty right third rear claw
• dusty right third rib
• dusty right thumb
• dusty right tibia
• dusty right twelfth rib
• dusty right ulna
• dusty sacral vertebrae
• dusty second caudal vertebra
• dusty second cervical vertebra
• dusty second lumbar vertebra
• dusty second thoracic vertebra
• dusty seventh caudal vertebra
• dusty seventh cervical vertebra
• dusty seventh lumbar vertebra
• dusty seventh thoracic vertebra
• dusty sixth caudal vertebra
• dusty sixth cervical vertebra
• dusty sixth lumbar vertebra
• dusty sixth thoracic vertebra
• dusty tenth caudal vertebra
• dusty tenth thoracic vertebra
• dusty third caudal vertebra
• dusty third cervical vertebra
• dusty third lumbar vertebra
• dusty third thoracic vertebra
• dusty twelfth thoracic vertebra
• dwarf bread
• dwarvish magazine
• eXtreme Bi-Polar Fleece Vest
• eXtreme meat crossbow
• eXtreme meat staff
• eXtreme meat sword
• eXtreme mittens
• eXtreme nose ring
• eXtreme scarf
• eagle feather
• eagle's milk
• ear candle
• ear poison
• earthenware muffin tin
• eau de mort
• eaves droppers
• ectoplasm au jus
• ectoplasmic orbs
• ectoplasmic paste
• edible alien plant bit
• eel battery
• eel sauce
• eel skin
• eelskin hat
• eelskin pants
• eelskin shield
• eerie fetish
• eerily silent box
• effervescent potion
• effluvious emerald
• eggbeater
• eggman noodles
• eggnog
• eggwater
• eighth plague
• elbow soup
• elderly jawbreaker
• eldritch alignment spray
• eldritch concentrate
• eldritch distillate
• eldritch dough
• eldritch effluvium
• eldritch elixir
• eldritch essence
• eldritch extract
• eldritch hammer
• eldritch hat
• eldritch ichor
• eldritch mushroom
• eldritch mushroom pizza
• eldritch oil
• eldritch pants
• eldritch rub
• eldritch scanner
• eldritch tincture
• electric Kool-Aid
• electric copperhead potion
• electric crutch
• electric mushroom
• electric pants
• electric snakebite
• electrical thingamabob
• electronic Brain Trainer game
• electronic dulcimer pants
• electronics kit
• elegant nightstick
• elemental caipiroska
• elemental paste
• elemental sugarcube
• elephant stinger
• eleven-foot pole
• elevenderizing hammer
• elevennis shoes
• elevent
• elf army field rations
• elf ploughshare
• elf sleeper agent
• elven limbos gingerbread
• elven cellocello
• elven hardtack
• elven magi-pack
• elven medi-pack
• elven moonshine
• elven socks
• elven squeeze
• elven suicide capsule
• elven tambourine
• elven whittling knife
• embezzler's oil
• emergency glowstick
• emergency margarita
• emo roe
• empty Cloaca-Cola bottle
• empty Rain-Doh can
• empty hourglass
• empty lava bottle
• empty meat tank
• enchanted barbell
• enchanted bean
• enchanted bean burrito
• enchanted brass knuckles
• enchanted eyepatch
• enchanted fire extinguisher
• enchanted handwarmer
• enchanted muesli
• enchanted toothpick
• enchantlers
• encoder ring
• energized spores
• energy drink IV
• enhanced signal receiver
• enormous belt buckle
• enormous hoop earring
• enticing mayolus
• envelope full of Meat
• epic cluster
• epic wad
• eraser nubbin
• escargotsicle
• especially salty dog
• essential cameraderie
• essential soy
• essential tofu
• eternal knot tattoo
• even more tinsel
• everfull glass
• evil flaming eyeball pendant
• evil golden arch
• evil golden arches
• evil googly eye
• evil teddy bear
• evil teddy bear sewing kit
• excitement pill
• exclusive ultra-rare item
• executive mime flask
• exo-xo-skeleton-skeleton
• exotic jungle fruit
• exotic orchid
• expensive camera
• expensive champagne
• expensive cigar
• experimental carbon fiber pasta additive
• experimental serum G-9
• experimental serum P-00
• expired MRE
• expired bottle of peppermint schnapps
• expired can of franks 'n' beans
• exploding cigar
• exploding gum
• exploding hacky-sack
• explosion-flavored chewing gum
• extra DNA
• extra ooze
• extra special Crimbo stocking
• extra time
• extra-fancy ring setting
• extra-flat panini
• extra-greasy slider
• extra-grubby grub
• extra-hard jawbreaker
• extra-heavy BRICKO brick
• extra-large palm-frond toupee
• extra-potent gremlin mutagen
• extra-see-thru nightie
• extra-strength goo
• extra-strength red potion
• extra-strength rubber bands
• extra-strength strongness elixir
• extra-toasted half sandwich
• extremely confusing manual
• extremely skinny jeans
• extremely slippery nipple
• extremely wet T-shirt
• eye 'n' horn shampoo
• eye of newt
• eye of the Tiger-lily
• eye-pod
• eyebrow lifter
• eyedrops of newt
• eyedrops of the ermine
• eyedrops of the ocelot
• eyepatch
• f3d0r4
• fabric hardener
• fabric softener
• facehugging alien
• faded green protest sign
• faded red protest sign
• fairy gravy boat
• fake blood
• fake cocktail
• fake fake vomit
• fake washboard
• false eyelashes
• familiar scrapbook
• fancy ball mask
• fancy bath salts
• fancy beef jerky
• fancy beer bottle
• fancy beer label
• fancy blue potion
• fancy but probably evil chocolate
• fancy calligraphy pen
• fancy canapés
• fancy chocolate
• fancy chocolate car
• fancy chocolate sculpture
• fancy dress ball
• fancy opera glasses
• fancy party pants
• fancy schmancy cheese sauce
• fancy seashell necklace
• fancy tin beer can
• farfalle bow tie
• fascinating alien zoological sample
• fat bottom quark
• fat stacks of cash
• fat wallet
• felt
• fermenting powder
• ferret bait
• fertilized ghuol egg
• festive egg sac
• festive holiday hat
• fetid feather
• fettucini épines Inconnu
• fettucini épines Inconnu recipe
• fettucini Inconnu
• fetus-smashing club
• fez of etymology
• fiberglass fibers
• fiberglass insulation
• fiery wing
• filet of tangy gnat ("fotelif")
• filigreed hamethyst earring
• filigreed hamethyst necklace
• filigreed hamethyst ring
• filled mosquito
• filth-encrusted futon
• filthy armor
• filthy child leash
• filthy corduroys
• filthy hippy poncho
• filthy knitted dread sack
• filthy monkey head
• filthy pestle
• filthy poultice
• fin-bit wax
• fine aged cheddarwurst
• fine wine
• finger cymbals
• finger exerciser
• fire
• fire ant pheromones
• fire axe
• [2426]fire flower
• fire hose
• fire of unknown origin
• fire poi
• fire-roasted lake trout
• fireball
• firebomb
• fireclutch
• fireman's helmet
• fireman's lunch
• firemilk
• fireproof megaphone
• fireproof skip lid
• first-aid pouch
• fish bazooka
• fish head
• fish juice box
• fish sauce
• fish scimitar
• fish stick
• fish stick cozy
• fish-liver oil
• fishbone belt
• fishbone bracers
• fishbone catcher's mitt
• fishbone corset
• fishbone facemask
• fishbone fins
• fishbone kneepads
• fishcake
• fishelada
• fishin' hat
• fishy fish
• fishy fish casserole
• fishy fish lasagna
• fishy paste
• fishy wand
• fistful of ashes
• fitness wristband
• five-fingered fern resin
• fixed-gear bicycle
• fizzing spore pod
• fizzy potion
• flagellate flagon
• flagellate soup
• flagstone flagments
• flame orb
• flamin' bindle
• flaming cardboard sword
• flaming crutch
• flaming familiar doppelgänger
• flaming feather
• flaming glowsticks
• flaming juggler's balls
• flaming mushroom
• flaming mushroom wine
• flaming nose
• flaming pink shirt
• flaming sword
• flaming talons
• flamingo mallet
• flan del mar
• flange
• flapper floppers
• flapper fly
• flaregun
• flashy pirate dreadlocks
• flask flops
• flask of Amontillado
• flask of Gnomochloric acid
• flask of baconstone juice
• flask of egggrog
• flask of embalming fluid
• flask of hamethyst juice
• flask of moonshine
• flask of porquoise juice
• flask of port
• flask of rainwater
• flask of tainted mining oil
• flat cider
• flat dough
• flat mushroom wine
• flavored foot massage oil
• flavorless gruel
• flayed mind
• fleetwood chain
• fleetwood mac 'n' cheese
• fleetwood macaroni
• fleshy putty
• flickering pixel
• flimsy clipboard
• flirtatious feather
• floaty gravel
• floaty inverse geode
• floaty pebbles
• floaty rock
• floaty sand
• floorboard cruft
• floral print shirt
• floral-print skirt
• flour cookie
• flower petal pie
• flowing hippy skirt
• fluid of fudge-finding
• fluorescent lightbulb
• flute of flat champagne
• flypaper staff
• flytrap bezoar
• flytrap pellet
• foam commodore's hat
• foam dart
• foam noodle
• foam pistol
• foetid seal tear
• foggy glass globe
• foie gras
• folder (D-Team)
• folder (Ex-Files)
• folder (Jackass Plumber)
• folder (KOLHS)
• folder (Knight Writer)
• folder (Seawolf)
• folder (Stinky Trash Kid)
• folder (Yedi)
• folder (barbarian)
• folder (blue)
• folder (catfish)
• folder (cyan)
• folder (dancing dolphins)
• folder (green)
• folder (heavy metal)
• folder (holographic fractal)
• folder (magenta)
• folder (owl)
• folder (rainbow unicorn)
• folder (red)
• folder (skull and crossbones)
• folder (smiley face)
• folder (space skeleton)
• folder (sports car)
• folder (sportsballs)
• folder (tranquil landscape)
• folder (wizard)
• folder (yellow)
• food mailing list
• foolscap fool's cap
• foon
• foon of fearfulness
• foon of fleshiness
• foon of foulness
• foon of frigidity
• foon of fulmination
• football helmet
• forbidden danish
• forbidden sausage
• forest spirit rattle
• forest tears
• fortune cookie
• fossilized baboon skull
• fossilized bat skull
• fossilized demon skull
• fossilized limb
• fossilized serpent skull
• fossilized spider skull
• fossilized spike
• fossilized spine
• fossilized torso
• fossilized wing
• fossilized wyrm skull
• fountain 'soda'
• frankincenser
• frat brats
• frayed rope belt
• free boots
• freezer-burned frost-bitten tortellini
• freezerburned ice cube
• freezin' bindle
• freightcake
• french-fry grabber
• fresh can of paint
• fresh coat of paint
• freshwater fishbone
• freshwater pearl necklace
• frightful feather
• frigid air mattress
• frigid fudgepuck
• frigid hankyū
• frigid mote
• frigid ninja stars
• frilly shirt
• frilly skirt
• frontwinder skin
• frost flower
• frost-rimed desk bell
• frostbite-flavored Hob-O
• frosty halo
• frozen Mob Penguin
• frozen banquet
• frozen danish
• frozen feather
• frozen mushroom
• frozen nunchaku
• frozen shampoo-conditioner
• frozen turtle shell
• fruit basket
• fruit bat
• fruit bowl
• fruit-stuffed rumcake
• fruitcake
• fruitfilm
• fruity girl swill
• fruity pebble
• fry-oil-flavored Hob-O
• frying brainpan
• fudge cube
• fudge lily
• fudge pocket square
• fudge spork
• fudge-shaped hole in space-time
• fudgesicle
• full lava bottle
• full meat tank
• fumble formula
• funhouse mirror
• funky brass fez
• funky dried mushroom
• funky eyepatch
• funny bone
• funny paper hat
• furniture dolly
• furry fur
• furry green earmuffs
• furry green turtle
• furry halo
• furry kilt
• furry pants
• furry pill
• furry skirt
• fusilli marrownarrow
• fusillocybin
• future drug: Coolscaline
• future drug: Muscularactum
• future drug: Smartinex
• fuzzbump
• fuzzy bracelets
• fuzzy polar bear ears
• gabardine smithereens
• gaffer's tape
• gallon of milk
• gamer slurry
• gamma nog
• ganger bandana
• garbage juice slurpee
• garbage-juice-flavored Hob-O
• garish pinky ring
• gas balloon
• gas can
• gasmask
• gator shades
• gator skin
• gatorskin umbrella
• gauze garter
• gauze hammock
• gauze shorts
• gazely stare
• gazing shoes
• gelatinous meat mass
• generic healing potion
• generic mana potion
• generic restorative potion
• genie bottle
• ghast iron Garibaldi
• ghast iron cleaver
• ghast iron codpiece
• ghast iron heater shield
• ghast iron ingot
• ghost accordion
• ghost beer
• ghost bit
• ghost cucumber
• ghost key
• ghost pencil
• ghost pepper
• ghost pickle on a stick
• ghost protocol
• ghost thread
• ghost toga
• ghost trap
• ghostly body paint
• ghostly dagger
• ghostly ectoplasm
• ghostly pickling solution
• ghuol ears
• ghuol egg
• ghuol egg quiche
• ghuol guolash
• ghuol-ear kabob
• giant O
• giant X
• giant artisanal rice peeler
• giant book of ancient carols
• giant breath mint
• giant cactus quill
• giant candy cane
• giant cheesestick
• giant clay ashtray
• giant designer sunglasses
• giant diamond ring
• giant discarded bottlecap
• giant discarded plastic fork
• giant discarded torn-up glove
• giant driftwood sculpture
• giant fishhook
• giant foam finger
• giant giant moth dust
• giant glass of brandy
• giant grain of protein powder
• giant green gummi bear
• giant green gummi ingot
• giant gym membership card
• giant heirloom grape tomato
• giant jar of protein powder
• giant motorcycle boots
• giant moxie weed
• giant neckbeard
• giant needle
• giant penguin keychain
• giant pinky ring
• giant red gummi bear
• giant red gummi ingot
• giant safety pin
• giant shrimp fork
• giant stuffed bugbear
• giant tube of black lipstick
• giant turkey leg
• giant yellow gummi bear
• giant yellow gummi ingot
• giant yellow hat
• gibson
• gift-a-pult
• gilded BRICKO brick
• gilded lily
• gilded trumpet
• gill rings
• gimlet
• gin and tonic
• ginger snaps
• gingerbeard
• gingerbread bugbear
• gingerbread cigarette
• gingerbread dog treat
• gingerbread hoodie
• gingerbread horror
• gingerbread house
• gingerbread mask
• gingerbread moneybag
• gingerbread mug
• gingerbread mutant bugbear
• gingerbread nylons
• gingerbread pirate
• gingerbread pistol
• gingerbread restraining order
• gingerbread robot
• gingerbread smartphone
• gingerbread spice latte
• gingerbread trousers
• gingerbread waistcoat
• gingerbread wine
• gingernade
• gingerservo
• gingham blouse
• ginormous pumpkin
• ginseng
• giraffe-necked turtle
• glacial clock
• glacial sapphire
• gladiator tunica
• glark cable
• glass casserole dish
• glass gnoll eye
• glass of "milk"
• glass of baboon milk
• glass of drippy wine
• glass of gnat milk
• glass of goat's milk
• glass of herbal tequila
• glass of warm milk
• glass of warm water
• glass pie plate
• gleaming oyster egg
• glimmering buzzard feather
• glimmering great tit feather
• glimmering penguin feather
• glimmering phoenix feather
• glimmering raven feather
• glimmering roc feather
• glistening fish meat
• glistening oyster egg
• glistening staff
• glittery mascara
• glob of cream cheese
• glob of enchanted icing
• glob of extra-green chlorophyll
• glob of green slime
• glob of melted wax
• glob of salty molasses
• glob of spoiled mayo
• glob of undifferentiated tissue
• globe of Deep Sauce
• gloomy mushroom wine
• glow-in-the-dark dart gun
• glow-in-the-dark necklace
• glow-in-the-dark stuffed burrowgrub
• glow-in-the-dark wristwatch
• glowing El Vibrato drone
• glowing New Age crystal
• glowing esca
• glowing fungus
• glowing red eye
• glowing spore pod
• glowing syringe
• glyph of athleticism
• gnashing teeth
• gnat lasagna
• gnatloaf
• gnatloaf casserole
• gnatwing
• gnatwing earring
• gnauga hide
• gnauga hide buckler
• gnauga hide chaps
• gnauga hide kilt
• gnauga hide skirt
• gnauga hide vest
• gnauga hide whip
• gnawed-up dog bone
• gnocchetti di Nietzsche
• gnoll lips
• gnoll teeth
• gnoll-tooth necklace
• go-go potion
• goat
• goat beard
• goat cheese
• goat cheese pizza
• goat cheese taco
• goatskin umbrella
• gob of wet hair
• goblin autoblowgun
• goblin bone hilt
• goblin collarbone
• goblin hunting spear
• goblin paste
• gold Boozehounds Anonymous token
• gold crown
• gold lamé pants
• gold nuggets
• gold skull ring
• gold star
• gold tooth
• gold toothbrush
• golden banana
• golden fleece
• golden gum
• golden gun
• golden monkey statuette
• golden plastic oyster egg
• golden ring
• golden sausage
• golden twig
• goo magnet
• good ash
• good brain
• good gravy
• goodberry
• gooey drippy candy bar
• gooey lava globs
• gooey paste
• goofily-plumed helmet
• googly chest eyes
• googly eye
• gory drippy orb
• goth kid t-shirt
• goulauncher
• government
• government cheese
• government per-diem
• government-issue identification badge
• government-issued candy
• government-issued eyeshade
• government-issued necktie
• government-issued night-vision goggles
• government-issued slacks
• gr8ps
• grain of sand
• grandfather watch
• grape troll doll
• grapefruit
• grapes
• grass clippings
• grass whistle
• grassy cutlass
• grave robbing shovel
• graveyard snowglobe
• gravy boat
• gray bow tie
• gray seashell
• grease cannon
• grease gun
• grease trap
• greasy desk bell
• greasy paste
• great big capacitor
• great old fashioned
• greedy ghostling
• green BRICKO brick
• green and red bean
• green balloon
• green bean casserole
• green candy heart
• green cloth cap
• green drunki-bear
• green eggnog
• green gummi ingot
• green hamhock
• green lava globs
• green mana
• green peawee marble
• green pill
• green pixel
• green pixel potion
• green pixie spog
• green rock candy
• green rocket
• green seashell
• green smoke bomb
• green snowcone
• green-frosted astral cupcake
• green-iced sweet roll
• gregarious ghostling
• gremlin juice
• gremlin mutagen
• grey down vest
• grilled cheese sandwich
• grilled mooseflank
• grim fairy tale
• grimstone galoshes
• grimy lab coat
• grinning ghostling
• grinning turtle
• grip key
• grisly shell fragment
• grizzled bearskin
• grody jug
• grog
• grog nuts
• groggipop
• grogpagne
• grogtini
• groose grease
• groovy prism necklace
• groping claw
• grouchy restless spirit
• grouper fangirl
• groupie bra
• groupie lipstick
• groupie spangles
• groveling gravel
• grumpy old man charrrm
• grumpy old man charrrm bracelet
• grungy bandana
• grungy flannel shirt
• guancertina
• guano coffee cup
• guard turtle collar
• guard turtle shell
• guffin
• guild application
• guilty sprout
• guitar pick
• gummi ammonite
• gummi belemnite
• gummi bowtie
• gummi canary
• gummi fang
• gummi salamander
• gummi snake
• gummi sword
• gummi trilobite
• gummi turtle
• gumshoes
• gun cleaning kit
• gun parts
• gunky chicken
• gunner's daughter
• gunpowder burrito
• gunwale
• gunwale whalegun
• guts necklace
• guy made of bee pollen
• gym membership card
• gym shorts
• gyroscope
• hacked gibson
• haemolymphnode
• haggis socks
• haggis-infused soap
• haggis-wrapped haggis-stuffed haggis
• hair of the fish
• hair oil
• hair spray
• hairshirt
• hairy staff
• half double fruitcake
• half of a gold tooth
• half-baked potion
• half-digested coal
• half-empty carton of milk
• half-height cigar
• half-height unicycle
• half-melted spoon
• half-orchid
• half-rotten brain
• half-size scalpel
• half-sized guitar
• halfberd
• halibut
• ham steak
• hambrosier
• hamburger
• hamethyst
• hamethyst bracelet
• hamethyst earring
• hamethyst necklace
• hamethyst ring
• hamethyst-handled sixgun
• hamlet sandwich
• hammerus
• hand grenegg
• hand of Mr. Cards
• hand of cards
• hand-crafted candy cane
• hand-knitted Crimbo socks
• hand-knitted diving booties
• handful of Crotchety Pine needles
• handful of Laughing Willow bark
• handful of Smithereens
• handful of barley
• handful of bees
• handful of crafty noodles
• handful of drink tickets
• handful of fire
• handful of hand chalk
• handful of honey
• handful of moss
• handful of napalm
• handful of numbers
• handful of nuts and berries
• handful of pine needles
• handful of sand
• handful of sawdust
• handful of stubble
• handful of tips
• handful of toilet paper
• handful of walnuts
• handmade hobby horse
• handsomeness potion
• handyman "hand soap"
• hangman's hood
• happiness
• hard rock
• hard spore pod
• hardboiled egg
• hardening cream
• hardware upgrade
• hare brush
• hare pin
• harem girl t-shirt
• haunted Hell ramen
• haunted battery
• haunted bottle of vodka
• haunted cherry pie
• haunted eggnog
• haunted flame
• haunted gimlet
• haunted martini
• haunted orange
• haunted paddle-ball
• haunted pizza
• hawk
• hawkface potion
• hazardous sauce dosimeter
• head mirror
• head of emberg lettuce
• head-mounted Trainbot
• headhunter necktie
• headless sparrow
• heart cozy
• heart necklace
• heart of dark chocolate
• heart of rock and roll
• heart-shaped balloon
• heart-shaped candy whetstone
• heat-resistant gloves
• heat-resistant necktie
• heat-resistant sheet metal
• heather graham cracker
• heavy D
• heavy crown
• heavy duty umbrella
• heavy leather-bound tome
• heavy metal sonata
• heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr
• heavy necklace chain
• heavy-duty Crimbot aerial
• heavy-duty clipboard
• hedgeturtle
• hell in a bucket
• hellion cube
• helm of the white knight
• helmet recipe
• helmet turtle
• hemlock helm
• hemp backpack
• hemp candy necklace
• hemp net
• hemp string
• henna face paint
• henna tattoo
• hep waders
• herb brownies
• herbal stuffing
• herbs
• hermedisiac cologne
• hermit factoid
• hermit permit
• herringcello
• heteroerotic frat-paddle
• hewn moon-rune spoon
• hi-density nylocite leg armor
• hi-octane carrot juice
• hibernating Grimstone Golem
• hibiscus petal
• hideous egg
• high-end ginger wine
• high-energy mining laser
• high-pressure seltzer bottle
• high-resistance ultrapolymer plating
• high-speed upgrade
• high-temperature mining drill
• high-temperature mining mask
• high-test fishing line
• hill of beans
• hippo skin buckler
• hippo tutu
• hippo whip
• hippopotamus kilt
• hippopotamus pants
• hippopotamus skin
• hippopotamus skirt
• hipposkin poncho
• hippy bongo
• hippy herbal tea
• hippy medical kit
• hippy paste
• hippy protest button
• hipster cocktail
• hoarded candy wad
• hobo code binder
• hobo monkey
• hobo paste
• hockey stick of furious angry rage
• holiday log
• holistic headache remedy
• hollow rock
• holly-flavored Hob-O
• holo-bomber
• holo-platoon
• holo-tank
• holy bomb, batman
• home robotics kit
• homemade robot
• homemade robot gear
• homeopathic healing powder
• homeopathic mint tea
• honey mead
• honey stick
• honey-dew
• honey-dipped locust
• honey-drenched ham slice
• hopeful candle
• hopping socks
• horizontal tango
• hors d'oeuvre tray
• hot Dreadsylvanian cocoa
• hot and sour sauce
• hot ashes
• hot buttered roll
• hot button candy
• hot cluster
• hot clusterbomb
• hot coal
• hot cross bow
• hot date
• hot daub
• hot egg
• hot hi mein
• hot jelly
• hot katana blade
• hot nuggets
• hot pink lipstick
• hot plate
• hot powder
• hot spore pod
• hot stuffing
• hot wad
• hot watered rum
• hot wine
• hot wing
• hothammer
• hourglass
• hovering sombrero
• huge Crimbo cookie
• huge bowl of candy
• huge mint leaf
• huge mosquito proboscis
• huge pumpkin
• huge spoon
• human musk
• humble pie
• humming El Vibrato drone
• hungover chauvinist pig
• hunk of granite
• hushed puppy
• hustler shades
• hyperbolic plasma focuser
• hypnodisk
• hypodermic needle
• iFlail
• iGoogly
• iShield
• ice baby
• ice cream sandwich
• ice harvest
• ice hotel bell
• ice house
• ice pick
• ice porter
• ice rice
• ice sickle
• ice skate decoy
• ice skate doll
• ice skates
• ice stein
• ice wine
• ice-cold Cloaca Zero
• ice-cold Sir Schlitz
• ice-cold Willer
• ice-cold fotie
• ice-cold six-pack
• iceberg lettuce
• iced plum wine
• iced-out bling
• icicle katana
• icing poncho
• icy katana hilt
• icy mushroom wine
• icy-hot katana
• igloo pie
• illegal firecracker
• illicit fish sauce
• imaginary lemon
• imitation White Russian
• imitation crab meat
• imitation crab zoea
• imitation nice watch
• imitation whetstone
• immense ballet shoes
• immense cyborg hand
• imp air
• imp unity ring
• imported lemon lozenge
• imported taffy
• improved martini
• impure gasoline
• incredible pizza
• incredibly creepy marionette
• incredibly dense meat gem
• indescribably horrible paste
• indie comic hipster glasses
• industrial fire extinguisher
• industrial lubricant
• industrial strength anti-fungal spray
• industrial strength starch
• industrially-crushed ice
• inert sludgepuppy
• infernal fife
• infernal insoles
• infernal toilet brush
• infinite BACON machine
• inflatable LT&T telegraph office
• inflatable duck
• infrablack lipstick
• ingot turtle
• initiative shawarma
• ink bladder
• inkwell
• inky squid sauce
• innuendo
• insane tophat
• insanely spicy enchanted bean burrito
• insanely spicy jumping bean burrito
• insulated gold wire
• insulting hat
• intact anemone spike
• intact medium-wave antenna
• interesting-looking twig
• intergalactic pom poms
• interrogative elixir
• intimidating coiffure
• intricate clockwork big hand
• intricate clockwork cuckoo
• intricate clockwork egg
• intricate clockwork little hand
• intricate clockwork numeral I
• intricate clockwork numeral II
• intricate clockwork numeral III
• intricate clockwork numeral IV
• intricate clockwork numeral IX
• intricate clockwork numeral V
• intricate clockwork numeral VI
• intricate clockwork numeral VII
• intricate clockwork numeral VIII
• intricate clockwork numeral X
• intricate clockwork numeral XI
• intricate clockwork numeral XII
• intricate music box parts
• intriguing puzzle box
• invisibility cream
• invisibility potion
• invisible bag
• invisible potion
• ion grid
• ion-pulse modulation stabilizer
• irate sombrero
• iron chain
• iron dagger
• iron helmet
• iron pasta spoon
• iron torso box
• ironic battle spoon
• ironic jogging shorts
• ironic knit cap
• ironic mint
• ironic moustache
• ironic oversized sunglasses
• irradiated candy cane
• irradiated pet snacks
• irradiated turtle
• irresistibility potion
• irritability potion
• ivory cue ball
• jabañero pepper
• jabañero-flavored chewing gum
• jack flapper
• jagged scrap metal
• jagged tooth
• jalapeño slices
• jam band
• jam band bootleg
• jamfish jam
• janglin' bones
• jangly bracelet
• jangly spurs
• janitor sponge
• janitor's mop
• jar full of wind
• jar of "Creole Lady" marrrmalade
• jar of anniversary jam
• jar of fermented pickle juice
• jar of frostigkraut
• jar of magical relish
• jar of psychoses (Jick)
• jar of psychoses (The Captain of the Gourd)
• jar of psychoses (The Crackpot Mystic)
• jar of psychoses (The Meatsmith)
• jar of psychoses (The Old Man)
• jar of psychoses (The Pretentious Artist)
• jar of psychoses (The Suspicious-Looking Guy)
• jar of squeeze
• jar of swamp gas
• jaunty feather
• java cookie
• jawbruiser
• jazz soap
• jazzy cigarette holder
• jellyfish gel
• jet bennie marble
• jigsaw blade
• jingle bell
• jingling spore pod
• jitterbug larva
• jive turkey leg
• joybuzzer
• jug of "wine"
• jug of Gnomochloric acid
• jug of Sneaky Pete's Mojo
• jug of baconstone juice
• jug of booze
• jug of hamethyst juice
• jug of porquoise juice
• jug-o-magicalness
• juggling ball
• jumbo olive
• jumping bean burrito
• jumping bean taco
• jumping horseradish
• jungle drum
• jungle floor wax
• juniper berries
• junk band
• junk food
• junk trunks
• junk yard
• junk-mail shirt
• kamicorpse-ee
• karma shawarma
• keel-haulin' knife
• keg shield
• kelp
• kelp-holly drape
• kelp-holly gun
• kerosene-soaked skip
• ketchup
• ketchup hound
• kevlateflocite helmet
• khaki duffel bag
• kick-ass kicks
• kickback cookbook
• killer rag doll
• killing feather
• killing jar
• kilopede skull
• king cookie
• kite
• kitty sheet music
• kiwi
• kiwi beak
• kneecapping stick
• knight cookie
• knob bugle
• knob ka-bobs
• knob mushroom wine
• knobby helmet turtle
• knobby kneepads
• knoll mushroom wine
• knuckle sandwich
• kobold kibble
• kumquartz
• kumquartz ring
• kumquat
• kumquat supersucker
• lab-grown meat
• labrador cookie
• ladle of mystery
• large box
• large cocoa eggshell fragment
• large pile of sand
• large stone triangle
• large tankard of ale
• laser cannon
• laser targeting chip
• laser-broiled pear
• latte lovers member's mug
• lava balaclava
• lava cake
• lava-proof pants
• lavalarva
• lavawater
• lavender candy heart
• lavender paisley oyster egg
• lavender plastic oyster egg
• lavender polka-dot oyster egg
• lavender striped oyster egg
• law-abiding citizen cane
• lawnmower blade
• lead collar
• lead umbrella
• lead yo-yo
• leaf
• leaf of grass
• leaflet
• leather aviator's cap
• leather bookmark
• leather chaps
• leather glove
• leather mask
• leathery bat skin
• leathery cat skin
• leathery rat skin
• leechknife
• left bear arm
• leftover Crimbo rations
• leftover canapés
• leftover chocolate bar
• leftover pasty
• leftovers
• leftovers sandwich
• leg-mounted Trainbots
• legitimate business on the beach
• lemon
• lemon meringue pie
• lemon popsicle
• lemonade marble
• lemonhead caviar
• lemony scales
• length of old fuse
• length of string
• leotarrrd
• leprechaun hatchling
• lesser grodulated violet
• letterman's jacket
• lewd playing card
• li'l candy corn costume
• li'l ghost costume
• li'l knight costume
• li'l unicorn costume
• libation of liveliness
• libertagliatelle
• licorice boa
• licorice garrote
• licorice root
• licorice snake
• licorice whip
• lifeless meat doll
• lihc eye
• lihc eye pie
• lihc face
• limburger biker boots
• lime
• lime supersucker
• lime-and-chile-flavored chewing gum
• limepatch
• limp broccoli
• line
• linguini immondizia bianco
• linguini of the sea
• linoleum crossbow
• linoleum crossbow string
• linoleum helmet turtle
• linoleum meat stack
• linoleum ore
• linoleum staff
• linoleum stick
• linoleum sword
• linoleum sword hilt
• lint
• lion musk
• lion oil
• lip soup
• liquid SONAR
• liquid bread
• liquid ice pack
• liquid rhinestones
• liquid smoke
• literal grasshopper
• little black book
• little paper umbrella
• little piece of steel
• little red .epub file
• little red book
• little red jam
• little round pebble
• little wooden mannequin
• live lobster
• live nautical mine
• live wire
• liver and let pie
• liver popsicle
• livid energy
• llama lama gong
• loaded serum blowgun
• loadstone
• loaf of alien bread
• loaf of soda bread
• loafers
• loathing eagle baby-doll shirt
• lodestone
• logging hatchet
• logic synthesizer
• lollipop cufflinks
• lollipop stick
• long pork
• long pork casserole
• long pork chop sandwiches
• long pork lasagna
• long skinny balloon
• long-forgotten necklace
• long-stemmed rose
• longbox of Batfellow comics
• longhaired hippy wig
• loofah lumps
• loose blade
• loose purse strings
• loose teeth
• los chinos
• lost elf luggage
• lost key
• lotion of coldness
• lotion of hotness
• lotion of sleaziness
• lotion of spookiness
• lotion of stench
• love song of disturbing obsession
• love song of icy revenge
• love song of naughty innuendo
• love song of smoldering passion
• love song of sugary cuteness
• love song of vague ambiguity
• lovecat tail
• low tide martini
• low-budget shield
• lowercase N
• lucky Crimbo tiki necklace
• lucky Tam O'Shatner
• lucky ball-and-chain
• lucky bottlecap
• lucky cat collar
• lucky cat statue
• lucky cat's paw
• lucky lighter
• lucky rabbit's foot
• lucky rabbitfish fin
• lucky-ish pill
• lumbering jack
• lump of Brituminous coal
• lump of Saccharine Maple sap
• lump of bauxite
• lump of black ichor
• lump of clay
• lump of coal
• lump of diamond
• lump of loyal latite
• lump of not really wriggling eldritch matter
• lupine appetite hormones
• lupine sword
• lustrous drippy orb
• lustrous oyster egg
• luxury fly-tying workbench
• lychee chuhai
• lynyrd musk
• lynyrd skin
• lynyrd skinner toothblack
• lynyrd snare
• lynyrdskin breeches
• lynyrdskin cap
• lynyrdskin tunic
• machetito
• macroplane grater
• mad scientist's sock monkey
• madius
• mafia aria
• mafia filofax
• mafia organizer badge
• magenta seashell
• magic dragonfish fry
• magic lamp
• magic whistle
• magical baguette
• magical battery
• magical ice cube with a fly in it
• magical ice cubes
• magicalness-in-a-can
• magicberry tablets
• magilaser blastercannon
• magnetic sculpture kit
• magnificent oyster egg
• magnifying glass
• magnolia blossom
• magnum of fancy champagne
• maid head
• maiden wig
• makeshift cape
• makeshift crane
• makeshift sixgun
• makeshift skirt
• makeshift turban
• malevolent medallion
• mama's squeezebox
• mana curds
• mana-basted tofurkey leg
• mana-coated yams
• mana-fortified cranberry sauce
• mana-stuffed herbal stuffing
• mandarina colada
• mangled finger
• mangled squirrel
• manly bloomers
• mannequin leg
• mantis skull
• many-eyed glasses
• map to Anemone Mine
• map to Dolph Bossin's hideout
• map to Madness Reef
• map to the Cursed Village
• map to the Dive Bar
• map to the Marinara Trench
• map to the Mystic Wood
• map to the Putrid Swamp
• map to the Skate Park
• map to the Sprawling Cemetery
• map to the Towering Mountains
• maple leaf
• maple syrup
• marble molecules
• margarita
• mariachi G-string
• mariachi hat
• mariachi pants
• mariachi toothpaste
• marine aquamarine
• marionette
• marionette collective
• marshmallow
• marshmallow flambé
• marshroom
• martini
• martiny
• marzipan skull
• mashed potatoes
• mass of wriggling tentacles
• massive gemstone
• massive sitar
• massive wrench
• mauve paisley oyster egg
• mauve plastic oyster egg
• mauve polka-dot oyster egg
• mauve striped oyster egg
• mayfly bait necklace
• mayo pump
• meadeorite
• meat cowboy hat
• meat engine
• meat face
• meat from yesterday
• meat golem
• meat paste
• meat shield
• meat st‰¿bing club
• meat stack
• meat vortex
• meatball
• meatball machine
• meatcar model
• meatloaf helmet
• meatsmithing guide
• meatspout staff
• meaty helmet turtle
• medium stone triangle
• megacopia
• megatofu
• melon-infused sake
• melted Jell-o shot
• melty plastic grenade
• meme generator
• menorette
• mentholated wine
• menudo
• menudo ravioli
• mercenary headband
• mercenary pistol
• mercenary rifle
• mermaid's purse
• mesh cap
• mesquito proboscis
• metal band T-shirt
• metal mandible
• metal meteoroid
• metallic foil bow
• metallic foil cat ears
• metallic foil radar dish
• metandienone
• meteor shower cap
• meteoreo
• meteorite earring
• meteorite fragment
• meteorite necklace
• meteorite ring
• metrognome
• micronova
• microwave stogie
• mid-level medieval mead
• midget clownfish
• midriff scrubs
• milestone
• military candy cane
• military-grade peppermint oil
• milk of magnesium
• milky potion
• mime army camouflage kit
• mime army infiltration glove
• mime army insignia (cryonics)
• mime army insignia (espionage)
• mime army insignia (infantry)
• mime army insignia (intelligence)
• mime army insignia (morale)
• mime army insignia (psychological warfare)
• mime army insignia (pyrotechnics)
• mime army insignia (sanitation)
• mime eraser
• mime soul fragment
• mime-proof sunglasses
• mimeplasm
• mimosette
• mince pie
• mind flayer corpse
• mineapple
• miner's helmet
• miner's pants
• mini kiwi aioli
• mini kiwi antimilitaristic hippy petition
• mini kiwi bikini
• mini kiwi icepick
• mini kiwi illicit antibiotic
• mini kiwi invisible dirigible
• mini kiwi silicon tiepin
• mini kiwi tipi
• mini kiwi whipping stick
• mini kiwi-flavored aspirin-injecting lipstick
• mini-Mr. Accessory
• mini-marshmallow dispenser
• mini-martini
• mini-zeppelin
• miniature Jacob's ladder
• miniature antlers
• miniature boiler
• miniature carton of clove cigarettes
• miniature castagnets
• miniature crystal ball
• miniature deck cannon
• miniature dormouse
• miniature espresso maker
• miniature goose mask
• miniature life preserver
• miniature power pill
• miniature pruning shears
• miniature stuffed Goth Giant
• miniature tophat
• minin' dynamite
• miniscule beatbox
• mint-condition magic wand
• mint-in-box Powerful Glove
• mirrored aviator shades
• misfit dolly
• misfit hobby horse
• misfit teddy bear
• misshapen animal skeleton
• missing semicolon
• mixed wildflower greens
• mocking turtle
• model train set
• modern picture frame
• moist Crimbo spices
• moist sack
• moist sailor's cap
• mojo filter
• mole molé
• mole skin notebook
• molotov cocktail cocktail
• molten brick
• molten scrap metal
• monkey barf
• monkey wrench
• monomolecular yo-yo
• monster bait
• monster pants
• mood ring
• moomy dust
• moon-amber
• moonberry wine cooler
• moonglasses
• moose antlers
• moose chocolate
• moose thought
• mooseflank
• moosemeat pie
• moreltini
• morning dew
• moss floss
• moss mulch
• mostly rat-hide leggings
• mostly-broken sunglasses
• mostly-empty bottle of cookie wine
• mother's little helper
• mother's necklace
• mother's secret recipe
• mountain lion skin
• mourning wine
• mouse skull
• moustache sock
• mouth-watering mayolus
• moxie magnet
• muculent machete
• muddy pirate hat
• muddy skirt
• muffled muffuletta
• mugcake
• mulberry
• mulled berry wine
• mulled blood
• mulled cider
• mulled hobo wine
• mulled wine
• mullet wig
• multi-level marzipan
• mumming trunk
• mummy costume
• mummy mask
• mummy wrapping
• munchies pill
• murderbot live wire
• murderbot mask
• murderbot monofilament
• murderbot shield unit
• murderbot spring injector
• murderbot whip
• murky potion
• muscular soup
• mushroom fermenting solution
• mushroom filet
• mushroom pizza
• mushroom slab
• mushroom tea
• mushroom whiskey
• musk turtle
• muskox-skin cap
• mutant cactus bud
• mutant fire ant egg
• mutant gila monster egg
• mutant rattlesnake egg
• mutated candy lump
• mylar scout drone
• myrrh pouch
• mysterious chemical residue
• mysterious present
• mystery lollipop
• nachos of the night
• nail file
• nailswurst
• name change form
• nanite-infested candy cane
• nanite-infested eggnog
• nanite-infested fruitcake
• nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear
• nanofiber cloth
• nanorhino credit card
• nasty desk bell
• nasty gum
• nasty rat mask
• nasty snuff
• nasty-smelling moss
• nastygeist
• nativity shorts
• natto marble soda
• natto pocky
• natto-infused sake
• natty blue ascot
• natural fennel soda
• natural magick candle
• naughty fortune teller
• naughty paper shuriken
• ncle leg
• neck wreath
• necklace chain
• necrotizing body spray
• neg grog
• nega-mushroom
• nega-mushroom wine
• negative lump
• negotiatin' hammer
• nervous tick egg
• nest egg
• neurostim pill
• neutron lollipop
• neverending wallet chain
• new habit
• newborn kobold
• newly-hatched mayonnaise wasp
• nicksilver ring
• nicksilver spurs
• night-vision goggles
• ninja carabiner
• ninja crampons
• ninja fear powder
• ninja hot pants
• ninja mop
• ninja pirate zombie robot
• ninja pirate zombie robot head
• ninja rope
• ninjammies
• noir fedora
• non-Euclidean angle
• non-Euclidean non-accordion
• non-aged vinegar
• non-stick pugil stick
• norwhal helmet
• nosy nose ringy ring
• not-a-pipe
• nothing-in-the-box
• nothing-in-the-box-in-the-box
• nothingtini
• noticeable pumps
• novelty fruit hat
• novelty monorail ticket
• novelty tattoo sleeves
• noxious gas grenade
• nuclear stockpile
• nugget of Crimbonium
• nugget of nicksilver
• nugget of quicksilver
• nugget of sicksilver
• nugget of slicksilver
• nugget of sodium
• nugget of thicksilver
• nugget of ticksilver
• nugget of wicksilver
• numberwang
• nurse's hat
• nut-shaped Crimbo cookie
• nutcracking pliers
• nutty organic salad
• obnoxious riddle
• obsidian nutcracker
• ocarina of space
• occult jelly donut
• ocean motion
• octolus oculus
• octolus-skin cloak
• octopus's spade
• odor extractor
• off-hand balloon
• off-white paisley oyster egg
• off-white plastic oyster egg
• off-white polka-dot oyster egg
• off-white striped oyster egg
• offensive moustache
• office-supply crossbow
• officer's nog
• oil cap
• oil lamp
• oil of expertise
• oil of oiliness
• oil of slipperiness
• oil of stability
• oil pan
• oil shell
• oil slacks
• oil-filled donut
• oily boid
• oily mushroom wine
• oily paste
• ointment of the occult
• ojo de pez burrito
• old ball and chain
• old bronzer
• old candy wrapper
• old chum
• old coin purse
• old dry bone
• old eyebrow pencil
• old leather wallet
• old love note
• old patched suit-pants
• old rosewater cream
• old school Mafia knicke½æ
• old school Mafia knickerbockers
• old school beer pull tab
• old school calculator watch
• old-fashioned
• old-school pirate grog
• oldcake
• olive
• olive lo mein
• olive stir-fry
• one glove
• one million meat pancakes
• one piece of bubble gum
• one pill
• one-day ticket to Conspiracy Island
• one-day ticket to Dinseylandfill
• one-day ticket to Spring Break Beach
• one-day ticket to That 70s Volcano
• one-day ticket to The Glaciest
• one-winged stab bat
• onion shurikens
• oozenog
• open sauce
• opera mask
• opium grenade
• optimal spreadsheet
• orange
• orange and black Crimboween candy
• orange boxing gloves
• orange candy heart
• orange leather lanyard
• orange peel hat
• orange popsicle
• orange snowcone
• orange-frosted astral cupcake
• orc paste
• orc wrist
• orcish hand lotion
• orcish nailing lube
• orcish rubber
• orcish stud-finder
• organic potpourri
• origami "gentlemen's" magazine
• origami pasties
• origami riding crop
• oriole-feather headdress
• out-of-tune biwa
• out-of-work circus flea
• outlaw bandana
• oven mitts
• over-the-shoulder Folder Holder
• overclocked avian microprocessor
• overflowing gift basket
• overloaded Yule battery
• overloaded micro-reactor
• overloaded short-pulse transistor
• overpowering mushroom wine
• overpriced "imported" beer
• oversized fish scaler
• oversized ice molecule
• oversized pipe
• oversized pizza cutter
• oversized skullcap
• oversized snowflake
• ovoid leather thing
• oxygenated eggnog helmet
• oyster sauce
• pacification grenade
• pack of KWE trading card
• pack of chewing gum
• pack of pogs
• packet of beer nuts
• packet of beer seeds
• packet of dragon's teeth
• packet of mushroom spores
• packet of pumpkin seeds
• packet of rock seeds
• packet of tall grass seeds
• packet of thanksgarden seeds
• packet of tofurkey gravy
• packet of winter seeds
• padded tortoise
• page of the Necrohobocon
• pail
• painful penne pasta
• paint bomb
• paint palette
• painted shield
• painted turtle
• pair of bolt cutters
• pair of candy glasses
• pair of government shades
• pair of pearidot earrings
• pair of plants
• pair of ragged claws
• pair of scissors
• pair of twitching claws
• paisley spore pod
• palm frond
• palm-frond capris
• palm-frond cloak
• palm-frond fan
• palm-frond net
• palm-frond toupee
• palm-frond whip
• panhandle panhandling hat
• pants kit
• pants of the Slug Lord
• panty raider camouflage
• papaya
• papaya sling
• papaya slung
• papaya taco
• paper-plate-mail pants
• paperclip
• papier-mâché base
• papier-mâché bowl
• papier-mâché handle
• papier-mâché plaque
• papier-mâchine gun
• papotion of papower
• paraffin pieces
• parasitic claw
• parasitic headgnawer
• parasitic strangleworm
• parasitic tentacles
• parisian cathouse
• party balloon
• party beer bomb
• party crasher
• party hat
• party mouse hat
• party platter for one
• party pup
• party whip
• passable elf mask
• passed-out psychedelic bear
• pasta spoon
• pat of butter
• pat-a-cake pendant
• patch of extra-warm fur
• patchouli incense stick
• patchouli oil bomb
• patent aggression tonic
• patent alacrity tonic
• patent antipsychotics
• patent avarice tonic
• patent invisibility tonic
• patent leather shoes
• patent preventative tonic
• pawn cookie
• peace accordion
• peace-sign necklace
• peach
• peach lozenge
• peach pie
• peanut brittle shield
• peanut sauce
• pear
• pear lozenge
• pear supersucker
• pear tart
• pearidot
• pearl diver's necklace
• pearl diver's ring
• pearlescent oyster egg
• pebble of proud pyrite
• pebblebräu
• pec oil
• pecan pie
• pegfinger
• pencil kunai
• pencil stub
• penguin focaccia bread
• penguin paste
• penguin shorts
• penguin skin
• penguin skin buckler
• penguin thesaurus
• penguin whip
• penguin-smacking club
• penguinskin mini-kilt
• penguinskin mini-skirt
• pentacorn hat
• pentagram bandana
• pentatonic accordion
• peppermint bomb
• peppermint crook
• peppermint donut
• peppermint eel sauce
• peppermint harpoon gun
• peppermint parasol
• peppermint patty
• peppermint rhino baby
• peppermint spine
• peppermint sprig
• peppermint sprout
• peppermint syrup
• peppermint tack
• peppermint twist
• peppermint-scented socks
• perfect cosmopolitan
• perfect dark and stormy
• perfect mimosa
• perfect negroni
• perfect old-fashioned
• perfect paloma
• perfectly ordinary frog
• perforated battle paddle
• perfume of prejudice
• perfume-soaked bandana
• perl necklace
• perpendicular guano
• perpendicular hula
• perpendicular hula with a fly in it
• personal graffiti kit
• personalizable gingerbread cookie
• personalized coffee mug
• personalized wassail stein
• pestoblade
• pestopiary
• pet anchor
• pet anemone
• pet bad vibe
• pet rock
• pet rock "Groucho" disguise
• pet rock "Snooty" disguise
• petit 4.1
• petit fortran
• petrified noodles
• petrified time
• petrified wood
• pewter candlestick
• pewter claymore
• pewter shavings
• ph balancer
• phase-tuned shield generator belt
• phat turquoise bead
• phat turquoise bracelet
• philosopher's scone
• philter of phorce
• phish stick
• phonics down
• photo booth sized crate
• photoprotoneutron torpedo
• physiostim pill
• pickelhaube
• pickle-flavored chewing gum
• pickled egg
• pickled grasshopper
• picky tweezers
• picture of a dead guy's girlfriend
• pie crust
• piece of after eight
• piece of driftwood
• piece of wedding cake
• piercing post
• pigeon egg
• piggy tattoo
• pile of Trainbot parts
• pile of candy
• pile of dirt
• pile of dungeon junk
• pile of dusty animal bones
• pile of gold coins
• pile of gritty sand
• pile of jumping beans
• pile of loose snow
• pile of sand
• pile of smoking rags
• pill cup
• pillow shell
• pimpin' meat hat
• pin-stripe slacks
• pine cone
• pine cone necklace
• pine tar
• pineapple slab
• ping-pong ball
• pink candy heart
• pink pinkslip slip
• pink pony
• pink slime
• pink-belly slapper
• pink-frosted astral cupcake
• pipe wrench
• piping organ pie
• piracetam
• piranha pollen
• pirate brochure
• pirate cream pie
• pirate encryption key (complete)
• pirate encryption key alpha
• pirate encryption key bravo
• pirate encryption key charlie
• pirate encryption key delta
• pirate hook
• pirate pamphlet
• pirate pantaloons
• pirate paste
• pirate pelvis
• pirate shaving cream
• pirate shirt
• pirate skull
• pirate tract
• pirate zombie head
• pirate zombie robot head
• piratical blunderbuss
• piscatini
• pitchfork
• pitted sheet metal
• pixel banana
• pixel beer
• pixel boomerang
• pixel bread
• pixel coin
• pixel cross
• pixel daiquiri
• pixel energy tank
• pixel grappling hook
• pixel hat
• pixel holy water
• pixel lemon
• pixel orb
• pixel pants
• pixel pill
• pixel power cell
• pixel shield
• pixel star
• pixel stopwatch
• pixel sword
• pixel whip
• pixel whiskey
• pixellated candy heart
• pixellated moneybag
• pixie axie
• plague pie
• plaid bandage
• plaid cowboy hat
• plaid pocket square
• plaid skirt
• plaid swatch
• plain bagel
• plain candy cane
• plain old beer
• plain paper hat
• plain pizza
• plain snowcone
• plans for depleted Grimacite astrolabe
• plans for depleted Grimacite grappling hook
• plans for depleted Grimacite gravy boat
• plans for depleted Grimacite hammer
• plans for depleted Grimacite ninja mask
• plans for depleted Grimacite shinguards
• plans for depleted Grimacite weightlifting belt
• plastic Crimbo reindeer
• plastic Jefferson wings
• plastic bazooka
• plastic bib
• plastic cup of beer
• plastic cup of flat beer
• plastic doll arms
• plastic doll legs
• plastic guitar
• plastic ingot
• plastic nightmare troll
• plastic nunchaku
• plastic passion fruit
• plastic piranha pot
• plastic pirate hat
• plastic vampire fangs
• plate of Frigid Northern Beans
• plate of Heimz Fortified Kidney Beans
• plate of Hellfire Spicy Beans
• plate of Mixed Garbanzos and Chickpeas
• plate of Pork 'n' Pork 'n' Pork 'n' Beans
• plate of Shrub's Premium Baked Beans
• plate of Tesla's Electroplated Beans
• plate of Trader Olaf's Exotic Stinkbeans
• plate of Val-U Brand Every Bean Salad
• plate of World's Blackest-Eyed Peas
• plexifoam chin strap
• plot hole
• plum
• plum lozenge
• plum wine
• plumber's lunch
• plump juicy grub
• plunge-leg
• plush alielf
• plush alien hamsterpus
• plush dogcat
• plush ferrelf
• plush hamsterpus
• plush mutated alielephant
• plush mutated alielf
• plush sea serpent
• pocket ace
• pocket maze
• pocket theremin
• pocketwatch on a chain
• pog #01 (spider)
• pog #02 (Knob goblin)
• pog #03 (warwelf)
• pog #04 (skleleton)
• pog #05 (ninja snowman)
• pog #06 (filthy hippy)
• pog #07 (orcish frat boy)
• pog #08 (hellion)
• pog #09 (pirate)
• pog #10 (hobo)
• pog #11 (Naughty Sorceress)
• pogo stick
• pointed stick
• pointy mushroom
• pointy mushroom wine
• pointy red hat
• poison pen
• poisonous caviar
• poisonsettia
• poker face paint
• polished moon-amber
• polka-dot bow tie
• polo trophy
• poltergeist-in-the-jar-o
• polyalloy shield
• polyeaster egg
• polyesterene powder
• polymorphic fastening apparatus
• pompadour'd puppy
• ponytail clip
• poodle skirt
• pool cue
• pool of liquid metal
• pool shark hair oil
• pool torpedo
• popcorn
• poppy
• popsicle stick
• popular tart
• porcelain candy dish
• porkpocket
• porquoise
• porquoise bracelet
• porquoise eyebrow ring
• porquoise necklace
• porquoise ring
• porquoise-handled sixgun
• portable Othello set
• portable Spacegate
• portable cassette player
• portable dam
• portable motorcycle
• portable pantogram
• portable photocopier
• portable table
• portable wall
• possessed sugar cube
• possessed tomato
• possessed top
• possibility potion
• post-holiday sale coupon
• potato alarm clock
• potato masher
• potato pistol
• potato sprout
• potent potion of potency
• potion of X-ray vision
• potion of animal rage
• potion of potency
• potion of punctual companionship
• potion of spiritual gunkifying
• potion of temporary gr8ness
• potion of the captain's hammer
• potion of the field gar
• potion of the litterbox
• potted cactus
• potted fern
• potted power plant
• potted tea tree
• pottery barn owl figurine
• pottery club
• pottery hat
• pottery shield
• pottery training pants
• pottery yo-yo
• poultrygeist
• poutine
• poutine pole
• powdered candy sushi set
• powdered dice
• powdered donut
• powdered gold
• powdered madness
• powdered organs
• powdered oxygen
• powdered powdered sugar
• powdered toad horn
• powdered wig
• power pill
• power sock
• pr0n cocktail
• pr0n legs
• pr0n m4nic0tti
• pr0n stir-fry
• pr0n taco
• prank Crimbo card
• praying Grim Brother
• precious piercing post
• pregnant mushroom
• prehistoric spear
• premium malt liquor
• prescription noodles
• prescription teeth whitener
• present
• press-on ribs
• pressurized potion of perception
• pressurized potion of perspicacity
• pressurized potion of pneumaticity
• pressurized potion of possessiveness
• pressurized potion of proficiency
• pressurized potion of puissance
• pressurized potion of pulchritude
• pretty bouquet
• pretty flower
• pretty pink bow
• priceless diamond
• primitive alien blowgun
• primitive alien booze
• primitive alien loincloth
• primitive alien medicine
• primitive alien necklace
• primitive alien salad
• primitive alien spear
• primitive candy cane
• print screen button
• prismatic wad
• pristine fish scale
• pristine walrus tusk
• probability potion
• procrastination potion
• programmable turtle
• prohie's hat
• projectile chemistry set
• projectile icemaker
• propeller beanie
• prosthetic forehead
• protection stick
• protein paste
• protonic accelerator pack
• prototype stimulant
• prussian cathouse
• psychedelic bubble wand
• psycho sweater
• pteruges
• puce paisley oyster egg
• puce plastic oyster egg
• puce polka-dot oyster egg
• puce striped oyster egg
• puff of smoke
• pufferfish spine
• pulled blue taffy
• pulled green taffy
• pulled indigo taffy
• pulled orange taffy
• pulled porquoise earring
• pulled porquoise pendant
• pulled porquoise ring
• pulled red taffy
• pulled violet taffy
• pulled yellow taffy
• pulsing flesh
• pump-up high-tops
• pumpkin
• pumpkin beer
• pumpkin bomb
• pumpkin juice
• pumpkin pie
• pumpkinhead mask
• punching mirror
• punk patch
• punk rock jacket
• puppet strings
• purple corpsel
• purple pixel pie
• purple prose pen
• purple snowcone
• purple-frosted astral cupcake
• purpleheart "pants"
• purpleheart logs
• putty coat
• puzzling trophy
• pygmy adder oil
• pygmy blowgun
• pygmy briefs
• pygmy concertinette
• pygmy dart
• pygmy nose-bone
• pygmy papers
• pygmy phone number
• pygmy pygment
• pygmy spear
• pygmy witchhazel
• quadroculars
• quake of arrows
• quantized familiar
• quantized familiar experience
• quantum disintegrator pistol
• quantum nanopolymer spider web
• quantum polarity inducer
• quantum watch
• queen cookie
• questionable taco
• quicksilver ring
• quicksilver spurs
• quirky accordion
• rabbit punch
• rack of dinosaur ribs
• radiation-resistant helmet
• radiator heater shield
• radio button candy
• radioactive chew toy
• raffle ticket
• rag doll
• rainbow bomb
• rainbow crossbow
• rainbow glitter candle
• rainbow jellybean
• rainbow pearl
• rainbow pearl earring
• rainbow pearl necklace
• rainbow pearl ring
• rainbow sauce
• rainbow tie
• raisin
• ram horns
• ram stick
• ramekin of space nuts
• rare oboe
• raspberry
• raspberry beret
• rat appendix
• rat appendix kabob
• rat appendix stir-fry
• rat carcass
• rat head balloon
• rat scrapple
• rat tooth polish
• ratarang
• ratgut
• ratini
• ratskin belt
• ratskin pajama pants
• rattail whip
• rattler gland
• rattler rattle
• rattlesnake enrager
• ratty knitted cap
• rave whistle
• ravenous eye
• ravioli della hippy
• ravioli hat
• raw bread
• raw cranberry sauce
• raw gravy
• raw green beans
• raw mincemeat
• raw potato
• raw stuffing
• raw sweet potato
• raw turkey
• razor-sharp can lid
• razor-tipped yo-yo
• real cowboy hat
• realistic cap gun
• really dense meat stack
• really nice net
• really really sticky spider web
• really sticky spider web
• really thick bandage
• really thick spine
• really tiny cocktail shaker
• record of infuriating silence
• record of menacing silence
• record of tranquil silence
• recording of Benetton's Medley of Diversity
• recording of Chorale of Companionship
• recording of Donho's Bubbly Ballad
• recording of Elron's Explosive Etude
• recording of Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration
• recording of Prelude of Precision
• recording of Rolando's Rondo of Resisto
• recording of The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder
• recovered cufflinks
• recursive spline reticulator
• red China marble
• red ale
• red and green rain stick
• red and white claret
• red armband
• red badge
• red balloon
• red blood cells
• red book
• red box
• red button
• red coat
• red coin
• red drunki-bear
• red eye
• red foxglove
• red gummi ingot
• red lava globs
• red letter
• red mana
• red masque
• red paisley oyster egg
• red pixel
• red pixel potion
• red plastic oyster egg
• red polka-dot oyster egg
• red potion
• red red wine
• red rum
• red shirt
• red shoe
• red silk skirt
• red snowcone
• red striped oyster egg
• red tulip
• red velvet cake
• red white and blue claret
• red-and-green microcamera
• red-and-green sweater
• red-hot boilermaker
• red-hot knucklebone
• red-hot medallion
• red-hot poker
• red-hot sausage fork
• red-soled high heels
• redrum
• redwood rain stick
• refurbished air fryer
• regret hose
• regular-size brogurt
• rehearsing dramatic hedgehog
• reindeer hammer
• reindeer sickle
• reinforced beaded headband
• reinforced furry underpants
• reliable sixgun
• remaindered axe
• remorseless knife
• reodorant
• repaid diaper
• repaired El Vibrato drone
• repeating crossbow
• replica Elf Guard medal
• replica bat-oomerang
• replica key
• residual zeal
• resolution: be feistier
• resolution: be happier
• resolution: be kinder
• resolution: be luckier
• resolution: be more adventurous
• resolution: be sexier
• resolution: be smarter
• resolution: be stronger
• resolution: be wealthier
• respected companion biscuit
• returned Thinknerd package
• reusable shopping bag
• reverse Tantalus
• reverse-oscillating klystron
• rewinged stab bat
• rhesus monkey
• rhinestone cowboy shirt
• rhinestone cowhorn
• rhinoceros horn
• ribbon candy
• ribbon candy ascot
• ribcage rollcage
• riboflavin
• rice bowl
• rickety old unicycle
• ridiculous belt
• ridiculous cocktail
• ridiculous earring
• ridiculous sunglasses
• ridiculously huge sword
• ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon
• rigging knot
• right bear arm
• rigid carapace
• ring
• ring of Detect Boring Doors
• ring of adornment
• ring of aggravate monster
• ring of cold resistance
• ring of conflict
• ring of fire resistance
• ring of gain strength
• ring of half-assed regeneration
• ring of increase damage
• ring of teleportation
• ring of telling skeletons what to do
• ring of the Skeleton Lord
• ring setting
• rinky-dink sixgun
• roasted duck
• roasted marshmallow
• robin flan
• robin nog
• robin's egg
• roboduck-on-a-string
• robot grease
• robot reindeer protocol B.L.I.T.Z.E.N.
• robot reindeer protocol C.O.M.E.T.
• robot reindeer protocol C.U.P.I.D.
• robot reindeer protocol D.A.N.C.E.R.
• robot reindeer protocol D.A.S.H.E.R.
• robot reindeer protocol D.O.N.N.E.R.
• robot reindeer protocol O.L.I.V.E.
• robot reindeer protocol P.R.A.N.C.E.R.
• robot reindeer protocol R.U.D.O.L.P.H.
• robot reindeer protocol V.I.X.E.N.
• robotronic egg
• [2108]rock
• rock lobster
• rocket fuel
• rockfish stomach
• rockin' wagon
• rockin' wagon with a fly in it
• rocky raccoon
• rocky road ice cream
• rodeo whiskey
• rogue swarmer
• roll of Hob-Os
• roll of drink tickets
• roll of meat
• roller skate decoy
• roller skate doll
• rolling pin
• rook cookie
• root beer
• root beer barrel
• rose
• rotten tomato
• rotting beefsteak
• rotting cowskin
• rough fish scale
• round blue bomb
• round green sunglasses
• round purple sunglasses
• royal jelly taco
• rubber WWBBDD? bracelet
• rubber WWBD? bracelet
• rubber WWJD? bracelet
• rubber WWSPD? bracelet
• rubber WWtNSD? bracelet
• rubber axe
• rubber baby doll
• rubber band gun
• rubber cape
• rubber doll body
• rubber doll head
• rubber emo roe
• rubber gloves
• rubber nubbin
• rubber ribcage
• rubber spatula
• rubber spider
• ruby on canes
• rum and cola
• rum barrel charrrm
• rum barrel charrrm bracelet
• rum-soaked fruitcake
• runny fermented egg
• runny icing
• runproof mascara
• rusted-out shootin' iron
• rusty bonesaw
• rusty broken diving helmet
• rusty compass
• rusty diving helmet
• rusty grave robbing shovel
• rusty metal key
• rusty metal ring
• rusty metal shaft
• rusty old lantern
• rusty piece of rebar
• rusty porthole
• rusty rivet
• rusty speargun
• rusty staff
• rusty valve wheel
• rutabuga bag
• s'more gun
• sabre teeth
• sabre-toothed lime cub
• sachet of strange powder
• sack of doorknobs
• safarrri hat
• safety vest
• sake bomb
• salacious crumbs
• salacious lychee chuhai
• salacious screwdiver
• salamander slurry
• salamander spleen
• salinated mint julep
• salt plum
• salt plum sake
• salt wages
• salt water taffy
• salty drippy candy bar
• salty gumdrop
• salty slug
• sampler size toothpaste
• samurai turtle
• samurai turtle helmet
• sandcastle
• sandpaper
• sangria
• sangria del diablo
• sardine can key
• sauce of the ages
• saucepan
• sausage bomb
• sausage golem
• sausage without a cause
• sausage wonton
• savings bond
• savory crossbow
• savory dry noodles
• savory staff
• savory sword
• savoy truffle
• sawblade fragment
• sawed-off blunderbuss
• scabrous seal epaulets
• scale-mail underwear
• scary death orb
• scented massage oil
• scepter of the Skeleton Lord
• school spirit socket set
• scimitar cozy
• scintillating oyster egg
• scissor duck
• scorpion whip
• scotch on the rocks
• scrap metal
• scrap of sticky paper
• scratch 'n' sniff UPC sticker
• scratch 'n' sniff apple sticker
• scratch 'n' sniff dragon sticker
• scratch 'n' sniff rock band sticker
• scratch 'n' sniff unicorn sticker
• scratch 'n' sniff wrestler sticker
• screwdiver
• screwdriver
• screwing pooch
• scroll case
• scroll of Protection from Bad Stuff
• scroll of Puddingskin
• scroll of ancient forbidden unspeakable evil
• scroll of minor invulnerability
• scroll of pasta summoning
• scroll of protection from lycanthropes
• scrumdiddlyumptious solution
• scrumptious ice ant
• scrumptious reagent
• scrunchie tourniquet
• sea blueberry
• sea broccoli
• sea carrot
• sea cauliflower
• sea chaps
• sea cowbell
• sea cowboy hat
• sea cucumber
• sea grease
• sea holster
• sea honeydew
• sea jelly
• sea lace
• sea lasso
• sea leather
• sea lychee
• sea persimmon
• sea radish
• sea salt crystal
• sea salt scrubs
• sea tangelo
• sea truffle
• sea-worn candlestick
• seal tooth
• seal-clubbing club
• seal-skull helmet
• seal-toothed rock
• seaode
• seared dino steak
• seaweed
• sebaceous shield
• second-hand knockoff engagement ring
• secret blend of herbs and spices
• security blankie
• security flashlight
• seegar butt
• self-dribbling basketball
• self-repairing earmuffs
• senate fly thorax
• sensitive poetry journal
• sentient meat mass
• sequin-encrusted sweater
• sequined fez
• serpentine sword
• serum of sarcasm
• servo-assisted exo-pants
• servomechanical torsion facilitator
• set of Unobtainium straps
• set of jacks
• severed rocking horse head
• sew-on bandage
• sewage-clogged pistol
• sewer nuggets
• sewer snake
• sewer turtle
• sewer wad
• sewing kit
• shadow candy
• shadow stick
• shadowy cat claw
• shadowy seal eye
• shady shades
• shaker of dry rub
• shaking skull
• sham champagne
• shamanic beads
• shamanic ham
• shard of double-ice
• shark cartilage
• shark jumper
• shark tooth
• shark tooth necklace
• sharkfin gumbo
• sharp tin strip
• shavin' razor
• shaving cream
• sheet cake
• shellacked shell
• shells a la shellfish
• shield of the Skeleton Lord
• shim of shame shale
• shimmering rainbow sand
• shin gourds
• shingle
• shining goblet
• shining halo
• shining star cap
• shiny brass tailfeathers
• shiny butcherknife
• shiny gold fronts
• shiny hood ornament
• shiny ring
• shiny stones
• shiny tribal beads
• shipwright's hammer
• shirt kit
• shock belt
• shock collar
• shocked shell
• shoe ad T-shirt
• shoe gum
• shoo-fish pie
• shooting morning star
• shopkeeper beard
• short beer
• short calculator
• short deposition
• short glass of water
• short stack of pancakes
• short stick of butter
• short white
• short writ of habeas corpus
• short-handled mop
• shot of Sneaky Pete's Mojo
• shot of blackberry schnapps
• shot of granola liqueur
• shot of mescal
• shot of nepenthe schnapps
• shot of peach schnapps
• shot of pear schnapps
• shot of rotgut
• shot of wasp venom
• shoulder-mounted Trainbot
• shoulder-warming lotion
• shovelful of dirt
• shrapnel jelly donut
• shrimp cocktail
• shrinking powder
• shroomtini
• shuddering cow skull
• shuddersword
• shuriken salad
• shushed potatoes
• sicksilver ring
• sicksilver spurs
• siesta-ing Casagnova gnome
• signal fragment
• signal receiver
• silent A
• silent B
• silent C
• silent D
• silent E
• silent F
• silent G
• silent H
• silent I
• silent J
• silent K
• silent L
• silent M
• silent N
• silent O
• silent P
• silent Q
• silent R
• silent S
• silent T
• silent U
• silent V
• silent W
• silent X
• silent Y
• silent Z
• silent beret
• silent nightlight
• silent pea shooter
• silicon-infused gluteal shield
• silver Dreadsylvanian flask
• silver cheese-slicer
• silver cow skull
• silver face paint
• silver keg
• silver paté knife
• silver salt-shaker
• silver sausage
• silver shotgun shell
• silver shrimp fork
• silver table-scraper
• silver tongue charrrm
• silver tongue charrrm bracelet
• simple AI
• sinewy crossbow string
• single entendre
• single of Donho's Bubbly Ballad
• single of Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration
• single swig of vodka
• single-serving herbal stuffing
• single-use dust mask
• sinister altar fragment
• sinister ancient tablet
• sinister-looking cat
• six pack of Mountain Stream
• six tiny wedges of goat cheese
• six-armed sweater
• six-pack of New Cloaca-Cola
• six-rainbow shield
• sizzling desk bell
• sk8board
• skate blade
• skate board
• skate skates
• skate skin
• skeletal banana
• skeletal scabbard
• skeleton
• skeleton bone
• skeleton key ring
• skeleton quiche
• skeleton skis
• skeletortoise
• skewer
• skewer-mounted razor blade
• skewered cat appendix
• skewered cherry
• skewered jumbo olive
• skewered lime
• ski resort souvenir crate
• skin oil
• skirt / kilt kit
• skull gearshift knob
• skull with a fuse in it
• skull-shaped Crimboween cookie
• skulldozer egg
• slab of sponge
• slap and slap again recipe
• slap and tickle
• slap and tickle with a fly in it
• sleaze cluster
• sleaze clusterbomb
• sleaze jelly
• sleaze nuggets
• sleaze powder
• sleaze wad
• sleazy and sour sauce
• sleazy bindle
• sleazy fairy gravy
• sleazy hi mein
• sleep mask
• sleeping piano cat
• sleeping snowy owl
• sleeping stocking
• sleeping wereturtle
• sleeve deuce
• slick fish meat
• slicksilver ring
• slicksilver spurs
• slide rule
• slightly peevedbow
• slightly thicker filthy rags
• slime convention coupons
• slime convention flyers
• slime convention pin
• slime convention swag bag
• slime convention t-shirt
• slime fedora
• slime shooter
• slime stack
• slime-covered club
• slime-covered compass
• slime-covered greaves
• slime-covered helmet
• slime-covered lantern
• slime-covered necklace
• slime-covered speargun
• slime-covered staff
• slimy alveolus
• slimy chest
• slimy fermented bile bladder
• slimy paste
• slimy sweetbreads
• slingshot
• slip 'n' slide
• sludgesicle
• slug of rum
• slug of shochu
• slug of vodka
• small Crimbo Pressie
• small golem
• small gummi fin
• small leather glove
• small pile of sand
• small stone triangle
• smart skull
• smart watch
• smashed danish
• smellbook
• smelted roe
• smile-sharpening stone
• smiley-face sticker
• smiling rat
• smirking shrunken head
• smoked potsherd
• smoker's cloak
• smoking grass
• smoky potion
• smoldering staff
• smooth mushroom wine
• smooth velvet bra
• smooth velvet hanky
• smooth velvet hat
• smooth velvet pants
• smooth velvet pocket square
• smooth velvet shirt
• smooth velvet socks
• smudge stick
• smudged alchemical recipe
• smut orc sunglasses
• snailmail bits
• snailmail breeches
• snailmail coif
• snailmail hauberk
• snake
• snake oil
• snake shield
• snakebite
• snakeskin cowboy hat
• snapdragon pistil
• snarling wolf shield
• sneakeasies
• snifter of thoroughly aged brandy
• snorkel
• snow berries
• snow cleats
• snow crab
• snow fort
• snow halo
• snow machine
• snowball
• snowboarder pants
• snowpack
• snowstick
• sober pill
• sock garters
• sock monkey
• soda water
• soft cap of diminishing returns
• soft green echo eyedrop antidote martini
• software bug
• software glitch
• soggy elf shoes
• soggy gingerbread chunk
• soggy seed packet
• soggy used band-aid
• soggy wofl t-shirt
• soilzerac
• solid baconstone earring
• solid baconstone necklace
• solid baconstone ring
• solid gold bowling ball
• solid gold jewel
• solid gold pegleg
• solid shifting time weirdness
• solid state loom
• sommelier's towel
• sonar fishfinder
• sorority brain
• soul coin
• soul doorbell
• soul knife
• soul mask
• soul monocle
• soup turtle
• soup-chucks
• sour ball and chain
• sour powder
• souvenir flag
• souvenir ski t-shirt
• soy cordial
• soyburger juice
• soylent staff
• space bar
• space beast fur
• space beast fur hat
• space beast fur pants
• space beast fur whip
• space chowder
• space heater
• space invader
• space jam
• space jam toast
• space jellybicycle
• space junk
• space marine flash grenade
• space needle
• space pirate treasure map
• space trooper helmet
• space wine
• spade necklace
• spagecialetti
• spaghetti breakfast
• spaghetti con calaveras
• spaghetti cult mask
• spaghetti cult rosary
• spaghetti with Skullheads
• spaghetti with ghost balls
• spaghetti with rock-balls
• spandex anniversary shorts
• spangly mariachi pants
• spangly mariachi vest
• spangly sombrero
• spangly unitard
• spant chitin
• spant tendon
• spare battery
• spare neck bolts
• sparking El Vibrato drone
• sparking robo-battery
• sparkler
• sparkling orb
• sparkly engagement ring
• spearfish fishing spear
• special clip: boneburners
• special clip: graveburpers
• special clip: splatterers
• special clip: squelchers
• special clip: tracers
• special clip: wailers
• special sauce glove
• specialty ammo bandolier
• spectral jelly
• spectral pickle
• sphygmomanometer
• spice melange
• spiced rum
• spices
• spicy bean burrito
• spicy enchanted bean burrito
• spicy jumping bean burrito
• spicy mushroom quesadilla
• spicy noodles
• spider leg
• spidercow eye-cluster
• spiked femur
• spiky turtle helmet
• spiky turtle shield
• spiky turtle shoulderpads
• spinal-fluid-covered emotion chip
• spinning wheel
• spirit bed
• spirit bell
• spirit blanket
• spirit gum
• spirit mattress
• spirit pillow
• spirit sheet
• spiritual candy cane
• spiritual eggnog
• spiritual fruitcake
• spiritual gingerbread
• sponge helmet
• spongy shield
• spooky alphabet block
• spooky and sour sauce
• spooky bark
• spooky bicycle chain
• spooky bindle
• spooky cluster
• spooky clusterbomb
• spooky cosmetics bag
• spooky eggnog
• spooky eyeliner
• spooky felt
• spooky gravy fairy warlock hat
• spooky hi mein
• spooky jelly
• spooky lasso
• spooky length of string
• spooky lipstick
• spooky lo mein
• spooky mushroom
• spooky mushroom wine
• spooky music box mechanism
• spooky nuggets
• spooky pirate skeleton
• spooky powder
• spooky sap
• spooky scarecrow
• spooky shroomkabob
• spooky shrunken head
• spooky sound effects record
• spooky staff
• spooky stick
• spooky stir-fry
• spooky stuffing
• spooky toy wheel
• spooky wad
• spooky wooden block
• spoon!
• spoonful of Linguine-Os
• spork
• spray chrome
• spray paint
• spring
• spring shoes
• sprinkle-begging cup
• sprocket
• sprocket assembly
• spruce juice
• square CRIMBCOOKIE
• square sponge pants
• squashed frog
• squeaky staff
• squeaky toy rose
• squirming Slime larva
• squirming egg sac
• stained glass shards
• stained hard candy
• stained mattress
• stale Cheer-E-Os
• stale baguette
• stale cheer wine
• stalk of asparagus
• standard-issue cupcake
• staph of homophones
• stapler bear
• star
• star boomerang
• star buckler
• star chart
• star crossbow
• star hat
• star key lime
• star key lime pie
• star pants
• star pop
• star shirt
• star spatula
• star staff
• star starfish
• star stiletto
• star sword
• star throwing star
• starchy crossbow
• starchy staff
• starchy sword
• status cymbal
• stealth bomber
• steamed oyster
• steaming evil
• steampunk potion
• steamy ruby
• steel drivin' hammer
• steel knuckles
• steel sword
• steely marble
• stench and sour sauce
• stench cluster
• stench clusterbomb
• stench jelly
• stench nuggets
• stench powder
• stench wad
• stepmom's booze
• sterno-flavored Hob-O
• stick
• stick of "gum"
• stick of dynamite
• stick of firewood
• stick-on eyebrow piercing
• stick-on gnome beard
• stick-on mini solar panels
• stick-on-a-string
• sticky gloves
• sticky hand whip
• sticky lava globs
• sticky meat kilt
• sticky meat pants
• sticky meat skirt
• sticky sword blade
• stink-penny
• stinkin' bindle
• stinking agaricus
• stinkwater
• stinky cheese diaper
• stinky cheese eye
• stinky cheese sword
• stinky cheese wheel
• stinky hi mein
• stinky mushroom
• stinky mushroom wine
• stolen accordion
• stolen meatpouch
• stolen necklace
• stolen office supplies
• stolen sushi
• stomach turnover
• stomp box
• stone banjo
• stone baseball cap
• stone frisbee
• stone of eXtreme power
• stone turtle
• stone wool
• strange cube
• strange helix fossil
• strange paste
• strange shiny disc
• strange stalagmite
• strange stone pyramid
• straw hat
• straw pole
• strawberry
• strawberry daiquiri
• strawberry pie
• strawberry popsicle
• strawberry supersucker
• strawberry wine
• strawberry-flavored Hob-O
• strawberyl
• strawberyl necklace
• stress ball
• string of Crimbo lights
• string of dingle balls
• string of moist beads
• stringy sinew
• strongness elixir
• structural ember
• studded leather boxer shorts
• studded sealhide shield
• stuffed "L"
• stuffed Baron von Ratsworth
• stuffed Cheshire bitten
• stuffed Hodgman
• stuffed MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech
• stuffed Meat
• stuffed Mob Penguin
• stuffed alien blob
• stuffed angry cow
• stuffed astral badger
• stuffed baby gravy fairy
• stuffed bandersnatch
• stuffed can of asparagus
• stuffed carpenter
• stuffed caterpillar
• stuffed club
• stuffed cocoabo
• stuffed crazy bastard sword
• stuffed dodecapede
• stuffed dodo
• stuffed doppelshifter
• stuffed flaming gravy fairy
• stuffed frozen gravy fairy
• stuffed ghuol whelp
• stuffed gray blob
• stuffed hand turkey
• stuffed key
• stuffed kraken
• stuffed martini
• stuffed mind flayer
• stuffed mink
• stuffed monocle
• stuffed ninja snowman
• stuffed pocketwatch
• stuffed porpoise
• stuffed red and green pepper (stale)
• stuffed sabre-toothed lime
• stuffed scary death orb
• stuffed shoulder parrot
• stuffed sleazy gravy fairy
• stuffed snowy owl
• stuffed spooky gravy fairy
• stuffed spooky mushroom
• stuffed stab bat
• stuffed stinky gravy fairy
• stuffed teddy butler
• stuffed tin of caviar
• stuffed treasure chest
• stuffed undead elbow macaroni
• stuffed walrus
• stuffed yeti
• stuffed yo-yo
• stuffed zmobie
• stuffing
• stuffing fluffer
• stunt nuts
• sturdy Crimbo crate
• sturdy cane
• sturdy sword hilt
• stylish swimsuit
• styrofoam crossbow
• styrofoam ore
• styrofoam peanuts
• styrofoam staff
• styrofoam sword
• sub-molecular interocitor
• succulent marrow
• sucker scaffold
• sucky decal
• suede shortsword
• sugar banana
• sugar bunny
• sugar cherry
• sugar fairy
• sugar lime
• sugar raygun
• sugar sphere
• sugar-coated pine cone
• sugarplum ration
• suggestive strozzapreti
• sun-dried tofu
• sundae ration
• sunken chest
• suntan lotion of moxiousness
• super ka-bob
• super salad
• super-absorbent tarp
• super-size brogurt
• super-strong air freshener
• super-sweet fish goo (spoiled)
• superamplified boom box
• superduperheated metal
• superheated fudge
• superheated metal
• superhero mask
• support cummerbund
• supportive bra
• surgical apron
• surgical mask
• surgical tape
• surprisingly capacious handbag
• sushi doily
• swamp haunch
• swamp lolly
• swashbuckling pants
• sweat socks
• sweatband
• sweaty balsam
• sweet mochi ball
• sweet ninja sword
• sweet party mix
• sweet potato o' mine
• sweet rims
• sweet roll Alabama
• sweet tooth
• sweet-corn-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar
• sweetened reindeer fat
• swirling mushroom wine
• swirly potion
• sword behind inappropriate prepositions
• sword hilt
• sword of static
• swordzall
• synaptic soup
• syncopated turtle
• synthetic marrow
• synthetic rock
• synthetic stuffing
• t8r tots
• tabletop candy dispenser
• taco shell
• tail o' nine cats
• tailbone shield
• tainted icing
• tainted milk
• talisman of Seshat
• talkative skull
• talking spade
• tamarind-flavored chewing gum
• tambourine
• tambourine bells
• tangarita
• tangarita with a fly in it
• tangerine
• tangle of copper wire
• tangle of rat tails
• tangled mass of creepy pasta
• tankard of ale
• tap shoes
• tapped black lotus
• targeting chip
• tarnished bottlecap
• tarnished luggage key
• tarnished metal ring
• tarnished metal rod
• tarnished tastevin
• tarrrnish charrrm
• tarrrnished charrrm bracelet
• tassel
• tasteful black bow tie
• tasty louse
• tasty tart
• tattered scrap of paper
• tattoo gun
• tawdry amethyst
• tea for one
• teacher's pen
• tearaway pants
• teddy bear
• teddy bear sewing kit
• teddy borg
• teddy borg sewing kit
• teeny-tiny magic scroll
• teeny-tiny ninja stars
• teflon ore
• teflon shield
• teflon spatula
• teflon swim fins
• temperance whiskey
• temporary X tattoos
• temporary teardrop tattoo
• temporary tribal tattoo
• tempura air
• tempura avocado
• tempura broccoli
• tempura carrot
• tempura cauliflower
• tempura cucumber
• tempura green and red bean
• tempura radish
• tenderizing hammer
• tennis ball
• teqiwila
• teqiwila slammer
• tequila grenade
• tequila sunrise
• tequila sunset
• tequila with training wheels
• terra cotta tidbits
• terra panna cotta
• terrible poem
• testy toolbox
• thanksgiving bomb
• thanksgiving turkey
• that gum you like
• the finger
• the funk
• the kindest cold cut
• the most dangerous bait
• theoretical string
• thermos full of Knob coffee
• thermos of "whiskey"
• thermos of brew
• thick walrus blubber
• thicksilver ring
• thicksilver spurs
• thin black candle
• thin gold wire
• third ear
• third-hand lantern
• third-hand nunchaku
• thistle wine
• thought balloon
• three-legged pants
• three-tiered wedding cake
• throbbing organ pie
• throbbing rage gland
• throwin' ember
• throwing bone
• throwing candy
• throwing fork
• throwing knife
• throwing spoon
• throwing wrench
• thyme jelly donut
• ticksilver ring
• ticksilver spurs
• tightly-wound spine
• tighty whiteys
• time halo
• time helmet
• time shuriken
• time sword
• time trousers
• time's arrow
• tin cup
• tin cup of mulligan stew
• tin drum
• tin foil
• tin magnolia
• tin of submardines
• tin rations
• tin roof (rusted)
• tin snips
• tin tam
• tin thermos of chai
• tinsel fin
• tinsel orb
• tiny Mountie hat
• tiny Tina gun
• tiny baby scorpion
• tiny ballet slippers
• tiny balloon knife
• tiny barrel
• tiny bindle
• tiny bomb
• tiny bottle of absinthe
• tiny bowler
• tiny bust of Pallas
• tiny cell phone
• tiny dancer
• tiny do-rag
• tiny domino mask
• tiny fly glasses
• tiny frozen prehistoric meteorite jawbreaker
• tiny goth giant
• tiny knife and fork
• tiny makeup kit
• tiny maracas
• tiny ninja sword
• tiny nose-bone fetish
• tiny plastic Axe Wound
• tiny plastic Baron von Ratsworth
• tiny plastic Beelzebozo
• tiny plastic Best Game Ever
• tiny plastic Black Knight
• tiny plastic Bonerdagon
• tiny plastic Boris
• tiny plastic Boss Bat
• tiny plastic CRIMBCO HQ
• tiny plastic Captain Kerkard
• tiny plastic Cheshire bat
• tiny plastic Crimbo Casino
• tiny plastic Crimbo elf
• tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer
• tiny plastic Crimbo wreath
• tiny plastic Crimbomination
• tiny plastic Crimboween pentagram
• tiny plastic Don Crimbo
• tiny plastic Dr. Awkward
• tiny plastic Duke Starkiller
• tiny plastic Ed the Undying
• tiny plastic Felonia
• tiny plastic G Imp
• tiny plastic Gnollish crossdresser
• tiny plastic Gnomester Blomester
• tiny plastic Hellion
• tiny plastic Iiti Kitty
• tiny plastic Jarlsberg
• tiny plastic Knob Goblin King
• tiny plastic Knob Goblin bean counter
• tiny plastic Knob Goblin harem girl
• tiny plastic Knob Goblin mad scientist
• tiny plastic Knott Yeti
• tiny plastic Lord Spookyraven
• tiny plastic Mob Penguin
• tiny plastic Mr. Mination
• tiny plastic Naughty Sorceress
• tiny plastic Orcish Frat Boy
• tiny plastic Professor What
• tiny plastic Protagonist
• tiny plastic Scream Queen
• tiny plastic Sneaky Pete
• tiny plastic Spam Witch
• tiny plastic Spunky Princess
• tiny plastic Susie
• tiny plastic The Big Wisniewski
• tiny plastic The Man
• tiny plastic Trouser Snake
• tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo
• tiny plastic XXX pr0n
• tiny plastic accordion thief
• tiny plastic ancient yuletide troll
• tiny plastic angry bugbear
• tiny plastic angry goat
• tiny plastic anime smiley
• tiny plastic apathetic lizardman
• tiny plastic baby gravy fairy
• tiny plastic barrrnacle
• tiny plastic beanbat
• tiny plastic bitchin' meatcar
• tiny plastic blood-faced volleyball
• tiny plastic brainsweeper
• tiny plastic briefcase bat
• tiny plastic chunk of depleted Grimacite
• tiny plastic cocoabo
• tiny plastic coffee pixie
• tiny plastic conservationist hippy
• tiny plastic cubist bull
• tiny plastic demoninja
• tiny plastic disco bandit
• tiny plastic drunk goat
• tiny plastic fat stack of cash
• tiny plastic fax machine
• tiny plastic fiendish can of asparagus
• tiny plastic filthy hippy jewelry maker
• tiny plastic fluffy bunny
• tiny plastic four-shadowed mime
• tiny plastic fruit golem
• tiny plastic fuzzy dice
• tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick
• tiny plastic ghuol whelp
• tiny plastic giant pair of tweezers
• tiny plastic gift-wrapping vampire
• tiny plastic goth giant
• tiny plastic grue
• tiny plastic handsome mariachi
• tiny plastic hermit
• tiny plastic hobo elf
• tiny plastic howling balloon monkey
• tiny plastic killer bee
• tiny plastic lemon-in-the-box
• tiny plastic leprechaun
• tiny plastic lobsterfrogman
• tiny plastic mosquito
• tiny plastic mutant elf
• tiny plastic ninja snowman
• tiny plastic pastamancer
• tiny plastic protector spectre
• tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime
• tiny plastic sauceror
• tiny plastic scary clown
• tiny plastic seal clubber
• tiny plastic skeletal reindeer
• tiny plastic smarmy pirate
• tiny plastic spoiler
• tiny plastic spooky vampire
• tiny plastic stab bat
• tiny plastic star starfish
• tiny plastic stocking mimic
• tiny plastic strand of DNA
• tiny plastic sweet nutcracker
• tiny plastic taco cat
• tiny plastic topiary golem
• tiny plastic turtle tamer
• tiny plastic undead elbow macaroni
• tiny plastic warwelf
• tiny plastic whitesnake
• tiny plastic zmobie
• tiny prop sword
• tiny shaker of salt
• tiny sombrero
• tiny stillsuit
• tiny top hat and cane
• tip jar
• tires
• titanium assault umbrella
• toast with cold jelly
• toast with hot jelly
• toast with jam
• toast with sleaze jelly
• toast with spooky jelly
• toast with stench jelly
• toasted brie
• tobiko marble soda
• tobiko pocky
• tobiko-infused sake
• toe jam
• toe jam toast
• tofu casserole
• tofu stir-fry
• tofu taco
• tofu wonton
• tofurkey gravy
• tofurkey leg
• tofurkey nugget
• toggle switch (Bartend)
• toggle switch (Bounce)
• tomato daiquiri
• tomato juice of powerful power
• tomato soup poster
• tombstone-shaped Crimboween cookie
• tommy gun
• tongue depressor
• tonguebone
• tonic djinn
• tonic o' Banderas
• tonic water
• too legit potion
• tooth
• tooth cap
• toothbrush
• toothsome rock
• toothy trousers
• top
• topiary necktie
• topiary noseplugs
• topiary nugglet
• topiary tights
• torquoise
• torquoise ring
• tortoboggan
• tortoboggan shield
• tortoise's blessing
• totally sweet mohawk helmet
• tourmalime
• tourmalime tourniquet
• towel
• toxic globule
• toy Crimbot mega face
• toy Crimbot power glove
• toy Crimbot rocket legs
• toy Crimbot super fist
• toy accordion
• toy crazy train
• toy deathbot
• toy hoverpad
• toy jet pack
• toy maglev monorail
• toy mercenary
• toy ray gun
• toy six-seater hovercraft
• toy sixgun
• toy soldier
• toy space helmet
• toy taijijian
• toy train
• toy wheel
• traditional Crimbo cookie
• traffic jam
• traffic jam toast
• train whistle
• training scroll: Shattering Punch
• training scroll: Shivering Monkey Technique
• training scroll: Snokebomb
• trampled ticket stub
• transdermal smoke patch
• transmission from planet Xi
• transparent nog
• transparent pants
• transporter transponder
• tree skirt
• tree-eating kite
• tree-shaped Crimbo cookie
• trench coat
• trench lighter
• triad summoning scroll
• triangular CRIMBCOOKIE
• trick coin
• triggerfingerbone
• trilobite candy mold
• trilobite fossil
• triple barreled barrel gun
• troll britches
• tropical island souvenir crate
• tropical orchid
• tropical paperweight
• tropical swill
• tropical wrapping paper
• trousers of the white knight
• trout fang
• troutpiece
• true grit
• trusty torch
• tryptophan dart
• tube of cranberry Go-Goo
• tube of dread wax
• tube of hair oil
• tube of herbal ointment
• tube of pendulum lube
• tube of villain white
• tube sock
• tulip
• tuning fork
• turkey blaster
• turkish mostaccioli
• turtle mud
• turtle totem
• turtle voicebox
• turtle wax
• turtle wax greaves
• turtle wax helmet
• turtle wax shield
• turtle-shaped rock
• turtlemail bits
• turtlemail breeches
• turtlemail coif
• turtlemail hauberk
• tuxedo shirt
• twinkly nuggets
• twinkly powder
• twinkly wad
• twist of lime
• twisted piece of wire
• twisted-up wet towel
• twitching claw
• twitching space egg
• twitching time capsule
• two meat muck
• two-handed depthsword
• ultimate ultimate frisbee
• ultimate wad
• ultra-deluxe cupcake
• ultra-soft ferns
• ultracalcium
• ultrafondue
• una poca de gracia
• unappetizing mayolus
• unbearable light
• unbreakable umbrella
• uncanny desk bell
• uncapped blue lava bottle
• uncapped green lava bottle
• uncapped red lava bottle
• uncooked chorizo
• underwater slingshot
• undissolvable contact lenses
• unearthed potsherd
• unearthed volcanic meteoroid
• unemployed hunchbacked minion
• unevolved organism
• unfinished fruitcake
• unfinished pleasure
• unflavored wine cooler
• unfortunate dumplings
• unholy water
• uniclops egg
• unidentifiable dried fruit
• unidentified drink
• unidentified jerky
• uninteresting mayolus
• union scalemail pants
• universal biscuit
• unlocked meat locker
• unnamed cocktail
• unnatural gas
• unpowered Robortender
• unquiet spirits
• unrefined Mountain Stream syrup
• unremarkable duffel bag
• unrequired jacket
• unrolling pin
• unsanitized scalpel
• unsmoothed velvet
• unspeakable lozenges
• unstable DNA
• unstable laser battery
• unstable quark
• unused soap
• unused walkie-talkie
• unusual oil
• unwound clockwork grapefruit
• unwound cymbal-playing monkey
• unwound mechanical songbird
• unwrapped knock-off retro superhero cape
• upsy daisy
• urchin roe
• urinal cake
• used beer
• useless powder
• valuable coin
• vampagne
• vampire chowder
• vampire collar
• vampire duck-on-a-string
• vampire pearl
• vampire pearl earring
• vampire pearl necklace
• vampire pearl ring
• vampire pellet
• vampyric cloake
• van key
• veiny spore pod
• velcro boots
• velcro broadsword
• velcro ore
• velcro paddle ball
• velcro shield
• velour veneer
• velvet choker
• vengeful spirit
• very fancy whiskey
• very hot lunch
• very large caltrop
• very overdue library book
• very small red dress
• vesper
• vial of Gnomochloric acid
• vial of The Glistening
• vial of baconstone juice
• vial of blood simple syrup
• vial of hamethyst juice
• vial of holy water
• vial of hot blood
• vial of humanoid growth hormone
• vial of patchouli oil
• vial of porquoise juice
• vial of swamp vapors
• vibrating cyborg knife
• vibrating mushroom
• vicious spiked collar
• viking helmet
• villainous scythe
• vinegar
• vinegar-soaked lemon slice
• vintage smart drink
• vinyl boots
• vinyl ore
• vinyl shield
• violent pastilles
• viral DNA
• viral video
• virgin jello shot
• viscous lava globs
• vitachoconutriment capsule
• vitamin G pill
• vodka and cranberry
• vodka and tonic
• vodka barracuda
• vodka gibson
• vodka martini
• vodka stinger
• vodka stratocaster
• void shard
• volcanic ash
• volleyball
• voodoo doll
• voodoo glowskull
• vorpal blade
• votive candle
• votive of confidence
• wad of Crovacite
• wad of dough
• wad of slimy rags
• wad of spider silk
• wad of tofu
• waders
• walrus ice cream
• walrus-tusk earring
• wang
• war tongs
• warbear LP-ROM burner
• warbear accoutrements chunk
• warbear auto-anvil
• warbear badge
• warbear battery
• warbear battle greaves
• warbear bearserker greaves
• warbear bearserker mead
• warbear bearserker potion
• warbear beeping telegram
• warbear black box
• warbear blizzard mead
• warbear breakfast machine
• warbear breakfast machine assembler
• warbear ceremonial party pants
• warbear chemistry lab
• warbear dress bracers
• warbear dress greaves
• warbear dress helmet
• warbear drone assembler
• warbear drone codes
• warbear electric long johns
• warbear electric warscarf
• warbear electro-spiked helm
• warbear empathy chip
• warbear energy bracers
• warbear exhaust manifold
• warbear exo-arm
• warbear fancy fedora
• warbear feasting bread
• warbear feasting mead
• warbear feathered fedora
• warbear fleece-lined long johns
• warbear fleece-lined warscarf
• warbear foil hat
• warbear goggles
• warbear gyro
• warbear gyrocopter
• warbear heated ushanka
• warbear helm fragment
• warbear high festival pants
• warbear high-efficiency still
• warbear hoverbelt
• warbear hoverbelt piecepart
• warbear induction oven
• warbear jackhammer drill press
• warbear laser beacon
• warbear laser bowtie
• warbear lined ushanka
• warbear liquid lasers
• warbear liquid overcoat
• warbear long johns
• warbear metalworking primer
• warbear nuclear bowtie
• warbear officer greaves
• warbear officer requisition box
• warbear oil pan
• warbear party pants
• warbear plain fedora
• warbear plain helm
• warbear plain ushanka
• warbear plasma bowtie
• warbear polarized goggles
• warbear procedural hilarity drone
• warbear rejuvenation potion
• warbear requisition box
• warbear robo-camouflage unit
• warbear sequential gaiety distribution system
• warbear snowblindness goggles
• warbear soda machine
• warbear soda machine assembler
• warbear spiked helm
• warbear superpotion
• warbear thermoregulator bread
• warbear trouser fragment
• warbear wardance potion
• warbear warrior bread
• warbear warscarf
• wardrobe-o-matic
• warehouse clerk's glasses
• warehouse key
• warehouse walkie-talkie
• warm fur
• warm gravy
• warm mushroom
• warm war shawarma
• wasabi marble soda
• wasabi pocky
• wasabi-infused sake
• water log
• water pipe bomb
• water purification pills
• water wings
• water wings for babies
• watered-down Red Minotaur
• waterlogged bootstraps
• waterlogged cloth
• waterlogged crate
• waterlogged leather
• waterlogged metal
• waterlogged stuffing
• waterlogged wood
• wax banana
• wax booze
• wax pancake
• weasel stomping pants
• webbed comic mask
• wedge of gray cheese
• weedy skirt
• weegee sqouija
• weighted paperclip chain
• weird gazelle steak
• weremoose spit
• western-style skinning knife
• wet stew
• wet tack
• wet venom duct
• whale cerebrospinal fluid
• whalebone corset
• whalecake
• whalegun
• whalesteak
• whatsit-covered turtle shell
• wheel
• wheel of camembert
• whet stone
• whimpering willow bark
• whip kit
• whisker pencil
• whiskey and cola
• whiskey and soda
• whiskey bittersweet
• whiskey in a broken glass
• whiskey squeeze
• white Canadian
• white arm towel
• white balloon
• white belt
• white blood cells
• white candy heart
• white chocolate and tomato pizza
• white chocolate chip brownies
• white chocolate chip cookies
• white chocolate chips
• white collar
• white earbuds
• white elephant gift
• white hat hacker T-shirt
• white lightning
• white mana
• white page
• white picket fence
• white pixel
• white rice
• white satin pants
• white satin shield
• white snake skin
• white snakeskin duster
• white sword
• white tulip
• white whip
• white wine
• white-label gin
• whole turkey leg
• wholeberd
• whoopie cushion
• wicker shield
• wickerbits
• wicksilver ring
• wicksilver spurs
• wiffle-flail
• willyweed
• wind-up Whatsian robot
• wind-up chattering teeth
• wind-up ensign
• wind-up meatcar
• wind-up navigation droid
• wind-up owl
• wind-up spider
• wind-up vampire teeth
• windicle
• wine spritzer
• wings of fire
• witch hat
• witch wart
• witch's bra
• witch's bread
• witch's brew
• witty rapier
• woim
• woimbook
• wok lobster
• wolf mask
• wolf whistle
• wolfman mask
• wolfskull mask
• wonderwall shield
• wood screw
• wooden axe
• wooden block
• wooden figurine
• wooden salad bowl
• wooden spoon
• wooden stakes
• wool hat
• wool sock
• woolen cravat
• wooly loincloth
• worksite credentials
• wormwood stick
• worn tophat
• worst candy
• wrapping paper
• wreath of laurels
• wreath-shaped Crimbo cookie
• wriggling severed nose
• wriggling tentacle
• wristwatch of the white knight
• writhing drippy candy bar
• wrought-iron flakes
• wumpus-hair loincloth
• wumpus-hair wig
• x-ray mirror
• x-ray specs
• yabba dabba doo rag
• yak anorak
• yak skin
• yak toupee
• yak whip
• yakskin buckler
• yakskin kilt
• yakskin pants
• yakskin skirt
• yam and swiss
• yam burrito
• yam candy
• yam martini
• yam mayo
• yam slider
• ye olde golde frontes
• yellow brick road
• yellow candy heart
• yellow drunki-bear
• yellow gummi ingot
• yellow matter custard
• yellow paisley oyster egg
• yellow pixel
• yellow pixel potion
• yellow plastic hard hat
• yellow plastic oyster egg
• yellow polka-dot oyster egg
• yellow puck with a bow on it
• yellow seashell
• yellow snowcone
• yellow striped oyster egg
• yeti fur
• yo
• yo-yo
• yohohoyo
• yule grog
• yule gruel
• yule hatchet
• yule pup
• yummy death watch beetle
• zen motorcycle
• zmobie
• zombie
• zombie accordion
• zombie hollandaise
• zombie mariachi hat
• zombie mariachi pants
• zombie monkey necklace