| #8 | 1/6th Pound Cake | 71 |
| #49 | 5-Alarm Saucepan | 9 |
| #22 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes (used) | 1 |
| #12 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #9 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #10 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #105 | A. W. O. L. commendation | 61 |
| 🥈 | All-Hallow's Steve's fright wig | 1 |
| #93 | Amoon-Ra Cowtep's nemes | 1 |
| #327 | Ancient Saucehelm | 7 |
| #837 | Angelhair Culottes | 1 |
| #435 | Argarggagarg's fang | 4 |
| #618 | BURT | 1 |
| #845 | Bandolier of the Spaghetti Elemental | 1 |
| #111 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 72 |
| #824 | Baron von Ratsworth's tophat | 2 |
| #223 | Bash-Ōs boxtop | 5 |
| #52 | Beach Buck | 221 |
| #206 | Belt of Howling Anger | 1 |
| 🥈 | Big Candy's tophat | 1 |
| #909 | Bling of the New Wave | 1 |
| 🥇 | Bodacious MechaElf Hunter Saga:Relay Wolf | 1 |
| #1919 | Bonerdagon necklace | 2 |
| #202 | Boots of Twilight Whispers | 1 |
| #741 | Boss Bat bling | 4 |
| #2260 | Boss Bat britches | 2 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #33 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 1 |
| #35 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) | 2 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) | 1 |
| #250 | CRIMBCO lanyard | 2 |
| #1553 | CRIMBCO mug | 3 |
| #1164 | CRIMBCO scrip | 35 |
| #1643 | CRIMBCO wine | 2 |
| #35 | CSA fire-starting kit | 563 |
| #19 | Calzone of Legend | 1 |
| #61 | Caveman Dan's favorite rock | 1 |
| #6 | Celsius 233 (singed) | 1 |
| #50 | Chester's bag of candy | 2 |
| #411 | Chroner | 29 |
| #75 | Clara's bell | 5 |
| #738 | Claw of the Infernal Seal | 1 |
| #212 | Cloak of Dire Shadows | 1 |
| #48 | Coinspiracy | 341 |
| #2461 | Colander of Em-er'il | 1 |
| #50 | Cold One | 63 |
| #25 | Comet Pop | 78 |
| 🥇 | Comprehensive Cartographic Compendium (well-read) | 1 |
| #398 | Copper Alpha of Sincerity | 6 |
| #123 | Cosmic Calorie | 64 |
| #187 | Crimbo Credit | 61 |
| #6 | Crimbomination Contraption | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Mathematical Precision (dirty) | 1 |
| 🥈 | Crimbot ROM: Rapid Prototyping (dirty) | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Ruthless Efficiency (dirty) | 1 |
| #1440 | Crimbuck | 219 |
| #79 | Daisy's unclean bloomers | 2 |
| #13 | Deep Dish of Legend | 2 |
| #2662 | Disco 'Fro Pick | 1 |
| #17 | Drapes-You-Regally | 1 |
| #104 | Drowsy Sword | 155 |
| #1782 | El Sombrero De Lopez | 1 |
| #88 | El Vibrato restraints | 1 |
| #697 | Elder Turtle Shell | 4 |
| #16 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #138 | FantasyRealm Mage's Hat | 1 |
| #23 | Flan in the Moon | 9 |
| #23 | Freddy Kruegerand | 1,004 |
| #16 | Frosty's iceball | 1 |
| #30 | Fudgie Roll | 18 |
| #25 | FunFunds™ | 1,890 |
| 🥈 | Fuzzby | 1 |
| #367 | Galapagosian Cuisses | 3 |
| #377 | Garter of the Turtle Poacher | 3 |
| #197 | Gauntlets of the Blood Moon | 1 |
| #743 | Glass Balls of the Goblin King | 3 |
| #83 | Granny Hackleton's Gatling gun | 3 |
| #349 | Gravyskin Belt of the Sauceblob | 3 |
| #206 | Greaves of the Murk Lord | 1 |
| #1436 | Green Clover of Justice | 1 |
| #220 | Heimandatz's heart | 7 |
| #196 | Helm of the Scream Emperor | 1 |
| 🥉 | Hjodor's Guide to Arctic Dalmatians (used) | 1 |
| #130 | Hodgman's lobsterskin pants | 1 |
| #91 | Holiday Fun! | 3 |
| #142 | Instant Karma | 74 |
| #380 | Iron Beta of Industry | 21 |
| 🥇 | Jackass Plumber home game | 1 |
| #1281 | Jocko Homo's head | 1 |
| #720 | Krakrox's Loincloth | 1 |
| #47 | LOV Elephant | 1 |
| #813 | La Hebilla del Cinturón de Lopez | 1 |
| #48 | Lavalos's shell | 2 |
| #775 | Lederhosen of the Night | 1 |
| #6 | Lens of Violence | 2 |
| #76 | Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet | 204 |
| #444 | Marquis de Poivre soda | 2 |
| #18 | Martialest Arts trophy | 6 |
| #9 | Mayodiol | 11 |
| 🥈 | Mayoflex | 261 |
| 🥇 | Mayonex | 1,266 |
| #23 | Mayor Ghost's khakis | 1 |
| #20 | Mayozapine | 1 |
| #26 | Mer-kin dodgeball | 1 |
| #22 | Mer-kin dragnet | 1 |
| #5 | Mer-kin gladiator mask | 2 |
| #6 | Mer-kin gladiator tailpiece | 2 |
| #24 | Mer-kin switchblade | 1 |
| #70 | Mr. Cheeng's spectacles | 2 |
| #267 | Newman's Own Trousers | 4 |
| #686 | Nickel Gamma of Frugality | 6 |
| #26 | Ol' Scratch's ash can | 3 |
| 🥈 | Orange Star of Sacrifice | 181 |
| #525 | Order of the Silver Wossname | 1 |
| #108 | Oscus's garbage can lid | 1 |
| #88 | P.B.L.T. | 22 |
| #157 | Pain Dip | 1 |
| #942 | Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster | 7 |
| #88 | Pecos Dave's sixgun | 1 |
| #105 | Pink Heart of Spirit | 10 |
| 🥈 | Pocket Guide to Mild Evil (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | Pocket Meteor Guide (well-thumbed) | 1 |
| #770 | Red Rover BB gun | 1 |
| #191 | Rock and Roll Legend | 10 |
| #11 | SMOOCH codpiece | 1 |
| #511 | Safari Jack's moustache | 3 |
| #840 | Scalp of Gorgolok | 4 |
| #193 | Shield of Icy Fate | 1 |
| #75 | Shore Inc. Ship Trip Scrip | 19 |
| #12 | Source terminal CRAM chip | 1 |
| #10 | Source terminal DRAM chip | 1 |
| #21 | Spacegate Research | 3,187 |
| #7 | Spelunker of Fortune (used) | 1 |
| #26 | Staff of the Black Kettle | 4 |
| #61 | Staff of the November Jack-O-Lantern | 1 |
| #121 | Staff of the Soupbone | 1 |
| #32 | Staff of the Teapot Tempest | 2 |
| #9 | Staff of the Well-Tempered Cauldron | 10 |
| #37 | Steam Card: DemonStar (#3) | 4 |
| #38 | Steam Card: Meteoid (#2) | 5 |
| #38 | Steam Card: Space Trip (#2) | 6 |
| #211 | Sword of Dark Omens | 1 |
| #4 | Tales of Dread | 1 |
| #68 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) | 1 |
| #21 | The Art of Slapfighting (used) | 1 |
| #5 | The Big Book of Communism (used) | 1 |
| #39 | The Big Book of Every Skill | 1 |
| #25 | The Emperor's new hat | 3 |
| #19 | The Emperor's new pants | 4 |
| #27 | The Emperor's new shirt | 3 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #5 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #48 | The Joy of Wassailing (used) | 1 |
| #1032 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 1 |
| #57 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #17 | The One Mood Ring | 2 |
| #96 | The Six-Pack of Pain | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| 🥇 | Thinknerd T-Shirt | 1 |
| #1558 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 1 |
| #494 | Thwaitgold amoeba statuette | 1 |
| #829 | Thwaitgold ant statuette | 1 |
| #100 | Thwaitgold anti-moth statuette | 4 |
| #16 | Thwaitgold bee statuette | 19 |
| #828 | Thwaitgold bookworm statuette | 1 |
| #247 | Thwaitgold bug statuette | 6 |
| #122 | Thwaitgold butterfly statuette | 7 |
| #113 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 7 |
| #415 | Thwaitgold cockroach statuette | 1 |
| #252 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 15 |
| #232 | Thwaitgold fairyfly statue | 1 |
| #1722 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 1 |
| #1041 | Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette | 3 |
| #87 | Thwaitgold harvestman statuette | 1 |
| #306 | Thwaitgold keyhole spider statuette | 1 |
| #1201 | Thwaitgold maggot statuette | 3 |
| #259 | Thwaitgold nit statuette | 1 |
| #623 | Thwaitgold praying mantis statuette | 1 |
| #210 | Thwaitgold protozoa statuette | 1 |
| #292 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 13 |
| #255 | Thwaitgold spider statuette | 11 |
| #24 | Thwaitgold splendor beetle statuette | 17 |
| #531 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 14 |
| #506 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 13 |
| #516 | Thwaitgold wheel bug statuette | 1 |
| #912 | Volartta's bellbottoms | 1 |
| #33 | Volcoino | 30 |
| #25 | Wal-Mart gift certificate | 346 |
| #5 | Wal-Mart nametag | 1 |
| #1000 | Wand of Nagamar | 2 |
| #203 | Wand of Oscus | 1 |
| #25 | Xiblaxian 5D printer | 18 |
| #22 | Xiblaxian holo-wrist-puter | 14 |
| #12 | Xiblaxian stealth cowl | 1 |
| #727 | Yakisoba's hat | 2 |
| #55 | Yellow Moon of Compassion | 34 |
| #105 | Zombo's shoulder blade | 1 |
| #85 | Zombo's skull ring | 1 |
| #24 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | a suspicious address | 1 |
| #1138 | adorable seal larva | 2 |
| #10 | aerated diving helmet | 71 |
| 🥉 | alien source code printout (used) | 2 |
| 🥇 | all-year sucker | 1 |
| #99 | almost-dead walkie-talkie | 10 |
| #9 | alpine watercolor set | 3 |
| #148 | ancient oil painting of yourself | 1 |
| #409 | anniversary balloon | 2 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary pewter cape | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary tiny latex mask | 1 |
| #488 | around the world | 1 |
| #18 | artisanal homebrew gift package | 3 |
| #31 | asteroid belt | 2 |
| #163 | badass belt | 184 |
| #121 | ballast turtle | 4 |
| #30 | batskin belt | 52 |
| #333 | big rock | 2 |
| #8 | biker's hat | 1 |
| #13 | bit of clingfilm | 87 |
| #13 | blue LavaCo Lamp™ | 1 |
| #30 | blue class ring | 152 |
| 🥈 | bottle of goofballs | 1,945 |
| #37 | bounty-hunting helmet | 1 |
| #32 | bounty-hunting pants | 1 |
| #771 | bouquet of circular saw blades | 1 |
| #3336 | box of sunshine | 22 |
| #1605 | brick | 10 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #34 | buffalo dime | 16 |
| #276 | bunny liver | 26 |
| #135 | burnt snowpants | 1 |
| #66 | caustic slime nodule | 6 |
| #11 | ceramic celsiturometer | 1 |
| #13 | ceramic cestus | 1 |
| #1660 | cheap toaster | 1 |
| #3271 | club necklace | 1 |
| #849 | coconut shell | 10 |
| 🥉 | control crystal | 1 |
| #42 | cop dollar | 908 |
| #8 | cozy scimitar | 1 |
| #11 | crappy Mer-kin tailpiece | 1 |
| #243 | crumbling rat skull | 2 |
| #52 | cuppa Sobrie tea | 1 |
| #48 | das boot | 3 |
| #12 | dice-print pajama pants | 1 |
| #103 | double-ice britches | 1 |
| 🥉 | dreadful fedora | 1 |
| #8 | dreadful glove | 2 |
| #30 | drink chit | 17 |
| #731 | dry noodles | 20 |
| #147 | duct tape | 365 |
| #81 | duct tape buckler | 1 |
| #232 | duct tape sword | 1 |
| #55 | dwarvish war helmet | 1 |
| #46 | dwarvish war kilt | 1 |
| #48 | dwarvish war mattock | 1 |
| #2702 | easter egg balloon | 6 |
| #4 | eldritch tincture (depleted) | 1 |
| #10 | electrician's hardhat | 1 |
| #103 | empty agua de vida bottle | 1,660 |
| #777 | enchanted leopard-print barbell | 8 |
| #130 | eternal car battery | 1 |
| 🥈 | experimental carbon fiber pasta additive | 1 |
| #36 | exploding cigar | 135 |
| #1776 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #994 | facsimile dictionary | 7 |
| #406 | fat loot token | 1 |
| #11 | feathered headdress | 1 |
| #654 | festive sausage | 3 |
| #427 | figurine of a charred seal | 7 |
| #173 | figurine of a cold seal | 36 |
| #352 | figurine of a shadowy seal | 3 |
| #242 | figurine of a sleek seal | 9 |
| #121 | figurine of a slippery seal | 15 |
| #448 | figurine of a stinking seal | 4 |
| #244 | figurine of a wretched-looking seal | 4 |
| #303 | figurine of an ancient seal | 1 |
| #1061 | filthy lucre | 23 |
| 🥉 | fishy pipe | 43 |
| #323 | friendly cheez blob | 7 |
| #45 | frigid-ass club | 1 |
| #687 | fuzzy busby | 1 |
| #4728 | fuzzy dice | 1 |
| #374 | fuzzy earmuffs | 4 |
| #608 | fuzzy montera | 1 |
| #947 | garish pinky ring | 1 |
| #98 | gearbox necklace | 8 |
| #280 | ghost of a necklace | 12 |
| #28 | ghost pencil | 2 |
| #2535 | giant pinky ring | 1 |
| #427 | gift-a-pult | 1 |
| #58 | gingerbread gavel | 1 |
| #298 | gold wedding ring | 23 |
| #48 | grease cannon | 1 |
| #101 | green clay bead | 117 |
| 🥉 | green face paint | 1 |
| 🥉 | grubby wool beerwarmer | 21 |
| #10 | grubby wool gloves | 1 |
| #10 | grubby wool trousers | 1 |
| #192 | grue egg | 109 |
| #467 | grue egg omelette | 4 |
| #98 | hand-carved bokken | 1 |
| #110 | handful of confetti | 231 |
| #150 | hardened slime hat | 1 |
| #143 | hardened slime pants | 1 |
| #133 | haunted bindle | 1 |
| 🥇 | hazardous sauce dosimeter | 1 |
| 🥇 | heart of dark chocolate | 1 |
| #1387 | heart of the volcano | 2 |
| #19 | high-temperature mining drill | 2 |
| 🥉 | hobo code binder | 1 |
| #369 | hobo nickel | 731 |
| #556 | holiday cheese log | 3 |
| #11 | honey dipper | 1 |
| #8 | honeybritches | 1 |
| #19 | honeycap | 1 |
| #8 | honeypot | 6 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #12 | jewelry-making pliers | 29 |
| #1413 | macaroni duck | 1 |
| #820 | magical ice cubes | 10 |
| #245 | makeshift cape | 1 |
| #51 | meteorite guard | 1 |
| #61 | meteorthopedic shoes | 4 |
| #598 | mysterious silver lapel pin | 1 |
| #25 | note from Clancy | 3 |
| #113 | obsidian dagger | 94 |
| #97 | old sweatpants | 703 |
| #218 | ornate picture frame | 7 |
| #19 | paperclip cape | 2 |
| #20 | paperclip pants | 2 |
| #15 | paperclip turban | 2 |
| #17 | paperclip-on tie | 2 |
| #14 | papier-mâchéte | 1 |
| #4 | papier-mâchuridars | 2 |
| #14 | papier-mitre | 1 |
| #253 | pile of useless robot parts | 1 |
| #102 | pink clay bead | 200 |
| #4 | porcelain pelerine | 2 |
| #4 | porcelain pepper mill | 7 |
| #24 | porcelain police baton | 1 |
| #6 | porquoise-handled sixgun | 2 |
| #19 | pressurized potion of pneumaticity | 4 |
| #161 | purple clay bead | 28 |
| #571 | really dense meat stack | 11 |
| 🥈 | record of infuriating silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | record of menacing silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | record of tranquil silence (used) | 1 |
| #10 | red LavaCo Lamp™ | 1 |
| 🥈 | red and green rain stick | 1 |
| #26 | red class ring | 739 |
| 🥉 | red face paint | 1 |
| #653 | red-and-green sweater | 1 |
| #159 | reflection of a map | 3 |
| #1298 | rib of the Bonerdagon | 1 |
| #2133 | roll of toilet paper | 2 |
| #1022 | rusty chain necklace | 1 |
| #81 | sack lunch | 557 |
| #6 | saffron uttarasanga | 1 |
| #965 | sandwich of the gods | 7 |
| #1037 | sawblade shield | 1 |
| #739 | scrumptious reagent | 17 |
| #13 | sea cape | 1 |
| #10 | sea shawl | 1 |
| #393 | seal-blubber candle | 3 |
| #65 | sealhide belt | 1 |
| #76 | sealhide buckler | 1 |
| #63 | sealhide cloak | 1 |
| #68 | sealhide gloves | 1 |
| #74 | sealhide hood | 1 |
| #63 | sealhide leggings | 1 |
| #68 | sealhide moccasins | 1 |
| #85 | sealhide whip | 1 |
| #155 | sinister-looking cat | 1 |
| #34 | skull of the Bonerdagon | 53 |
| #79 | sleeping patriotic eagle | 1 |
| #42 | slime-covered club | 1 |
| #214 | slime-soaked brain | 1 |
| #202 | slime-soaked hypophysis | 1 |
| #26 | spaghetti breakfast | 769 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #89 | spark plug earring | 9 |
| #77 | spectre scepter | 235 |
| #36 | sprinkles | 41,519 |
| #19 | stainless steel scarf | 49 |
| #58 | stainless steel shillelagh | 25 |
| #9 | stainless steel skullcap | 32 |
| #73 | stainless steel slacks | 19 |
| #43 | stainless steel solitaire | 21 |
| #119 | stainless steel suspenders | 22 |
| #143 | standards and practices guide | 1 |
| #13 | stinky fannypack | 1 |
| #269 | sucker bucket | 1 |
| #257 | sucker hakama | 1 |
| #219 | sucker kabuto | 1 |
| #278 | sucker tachi | 1 |
| #43 | sugar chapeau | 12 |
| #33 | sugar shank | 15 |
| #216 | sugar shard | 5 |
| #320 | sugar sheet | 2 |
| #72 | sugar shield | 15 |
| #27 | sugar shillelagh | 19 |
| #27 | sugar shirt | 23 |
| #56 | sugar shorts | 12 |
| #33 | sugar shotgun | 16 |
| #17 | sushi-rolling mat | 4 |
| #32 | topeé | 1 |
| #23 | topiary necktie | 1 |
| #35 | topiary tights | 1 |
| #226 | turtle pheromones | 18 |
| #130 | turtling rod | 1 |
| #82 | twitching trigger finger | 1 |
| #959 | untamable turtle | 2 |
| #99 | vertebra of the Bonerdagon | 86 |
| 🥈 | walkie-talkie | 1 |
| 🥇 | wand of fudge control | 1 |
| #293 | warbear breakfast machine assembler | 1 |
| #6 | warbear ceremonial party pants | 1 |
| #188 | warbear chemistry lab | 1 |
| #308 | warbear drone assembler | 1 |
| #20 | warbear empathy chip (used) | 1 |
| #8 | warbear fancy fedora | 1 |
| #8 | warbear feathered fedora | 1 |
| #10 | warbear goggles | 1 |
| #6 | warbear high festival pants | 1 |
| 🥈 | warbear hoverbelt | 1 |
| #169 | warbear induction oven | 1 |
| #180 | warbear jackhammer drill press | 1 |
| #45 | warbear metalworking primer (used) | 1 |
| #8 | warbear party pants | 1 |
| #9 | warbear plain fedora | 1 |
| #9 | warbear polarized goggles | 1 |
| #10 | warbear snowblindness goggles | 1 |
| #177 | water-polo cap | 1 |
| #87 | water-polo mitt | 1 |
| #27 | white class ring | 462 |
| #438 | wine-soaked bone chips | 1 |
| #129 | worthless gewgaw | 96 |
| #189 | worthless trinket | 32 |
| #131 | woven baling wire bracelets | 7 |
| #28 | wriggling worm | 256 |
| #79 | wristwatch of the white knight | 1 |