thE tRAveLiNg RetArD

RankItemQuantity
#924:20 bomb1
#22458-ball1
#247A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 11
#225A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 61
#200Aluminum Epsilon of Humility2
#788Argarggagarg's fang2
#1133Asleep in the Cemetery1
#7BGE shotglass669
#309Baron von Ratsworth's money clip2
#2353Baron von Ratsworth's monocle4
#509Baron von Ratsworth's tophat4
#22Better Shrooms and Gardens catalog1
#883Biddy Cracker's Old-Fashioned Cookbook1
🥇Bloodbath1
#129Blue Diamond of Honesty4
#1368Bonerdagon necklace5
#110Boss Bat bling28
#206Boss Bat britches62
🥈Byte1
#1118CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1)1
#1013CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2)1
#1053CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3)1
#1020CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4)1
#1009CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5)1
#309Codpiece of the Goblin King23
#886Copper Alpha of Sincerity2
#1483Crimbo Candy Cookbook1
#171Crown of the Goblin King113
#296Doc's Miracle Cure4
#276Drowsy Sword70
#616FDKOL commendation69
#105Ghost Pinching Quarterly1
🥇Ginsu™1
#36Glass Balls of the Goblin King48
#344Green Clover of Justice6
#19Guzzlr application1
🥇Hat O' Nine Tails1
#759Heimandatz's heart2
#588Iron Beta of Industry11
#622Jocko Homo's head3
#837Kissin' Cousins1
🥇KoL Con 12-gauge1
🥇KoL Con 8-Bit power bracelet1
🥇KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat1
🥇KoL Con Six Pack1
🥇KoL Con X Treasure Map1
#86Lead Zeta of Chastity2
#1061Let Me Be!1
#341Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet75
#4LyleCo Contractor's Manual1
🥇Meatcleaver1
#171My First Art of War1
#16My Life of Crime, a Memoir1
#35NPZR chemistry set201
#53Neverending Party invitation envelope1
#538Nickel Gamma of Frugality10
#15No Hats as Art1
#664Orange Star of Sacrifice3
#304Order of the Silver Wossname2
#211Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster15
#13Peek-a-Boo!1
#314Pink Heart of Spirit3
#17Pop Art: a Guide1
#101Purple Horseshoe of Honor2
#5Radio KoL Maracas1
#77Red Balloon of Valor3
#715Safari Jack's moustache2
#4Scurvy and Sobriety Prevention1
#5Sensual Massage for Creeps312
🥈Seven Loco1
🥈Sinful Desires602
🥇Size XI Wizard's Robe1
#13Space Pirate Astrogation Handbook1
#11Spacegate emergency disintegrator1
#129Spirit Precipice1
#945Summer Nights1
🥈Sword of Procedural Generation1
#938Tales from the Fireside1
#93Tales of Spelunking1
#951Tales of a Kansas Toymaker1
#598The Art of Slapfighting1
#45The Gingerbread Vigilante's Handbook1
#85The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 11
#80The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 21
#79The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 31
#65The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 41
#82The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 51
#967The Joy of Wassailing1
#702The Mariachi's guitar case2
#302The Necbronomicon1
#102The Snitch's Manifesto1
🥈The Spirit of Crimbo1
#30The Spirit of Giving1
#170Thwaitgold bee statuette9
#19Trash, a Memoir1
#935Travels with Jerry1
🥇Truthsayer1
🥇Uncle Crimbo's Sack1
#200Unionize The Elves sign1
#25Unopened Eight Days a Week Pill Keeper1
#113Uranium Omega of Temperance2
#1119Yakisoba's hat1
#151Yellow Moon of Compassion17
#321Zinc Delta of Tranquility4
#10airplane charter: Conspiracy Island1
#16airplane charter: Dinseylandfill1
#37airplane charter: Spring Break Beach1
#14airplane charter: That 70s Volcano1
#14airplane charter: The Glaciest1
#203alien source code printout1
🥈anniversary balsa wood socks1
🥇anniversary burlap belt1
#227anniversary chutney sculpture1
🥈anniversary concrete fedora1
#2606anniversary gift box1
🥈anniversary pewter cape1
🥈anniversary safety glass vest1
🥈anniversary tiny latex mask1
#62antique 8-Bit Power magazine21
#290antique bottle opener3
#251antique painting of a landscape3
#354antique pair of blue jeans2
#537antique record album4
#306aspirin3
#1192astral mushroom1
#27baby camelCalf1
#192badass belt165
#23bag of Iunion stones1
#1147banana1
#29beer-scented teddy bear47
#622blood flower10
#621bloody mary1
#367bottle of goofballs68
#1073bottle of single-barrel whiskey1
#1505bottle of whiskey1
#569box of sunshine572
#2708brick1
#67broken clock1
🥇bucket of anniversary lard1
#34caustic slime nodule14
#227chunk of depleted Grimacite48
#9clockwork chef-head-in-the-box7
#176coconut bikini top1
#26comfy blanket1
🥉control crystal1
#736corrupted data1
#262crystallized memory1
#134dangerous jerkcicle1
🥇detour shield1
#4disturbing fanfic320,908
#200dollhive50
🥈donkey flipbook392
🥈dwarvish magazine2,095
#359easter egg balloon58
#30empty blowgun102
#202enchanted leopard-print barbell14
#315epic wad1
#142evil teddy bear112
#744extra-greasy slider1
#1985fake fake vomit1
#1375fat stacks of cash1
#1764fire1
#164floaty inverse geode1
#815foam dart1
#496foam noodle1
#121foreign box1
#578frayed rope belt1
#4736fuzzy dice1
#165giant discarded bottlecap30
#141giant discarded plastic fork58
#61giant discarded torn-up glove61
#106giant pinky ring125
#47goat cheese pizza333
#241green drunki-bear1
#826green gummi ingot9
#197grue egg108
#554handful of confetti73
#3382heart necklace1
#604heart of the volcano11
#541heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr1
#995herbs1
#182hobo fortress blueprints1
#4inflatable duck16,972
#43jar of anniversary jam1
#42lawn dart11
#15lewd playing card69
#1025line1
#36loaded serum blowgun76
#570lovecat tail1
#131magical pony: Dusk Shiny26
#130magical pony: Pearjack17
#154magical pony: Rosey Cake18
#133magical pony: Shutterfly25
#196magical pony: Spectrum Dash11
#213magical pony: Uniquity9
🥇map to Dolph Bossin's hideout1
#23mint-in-box Powerful Glove1
#7misfit teddy bear17
#186obsidian dagger68
#25old school flying disc16
🥇origami "gentlemen's" magazine5
#153pack of KWE trading card18
#22packaged SpinMaster™ lathe1
#264patent antipsychotics1
#754plastic passion fruit1
#93pool cue92
#555pork elf goodies sack11
#101psychoanalytic jar1
#36puzzling ribbon1
#342questionable taco1
#227raffle prize box1
#139really dense meat stack37
#35record of infuriating silence1
#25record of menacing silence1
#28record of tranquil silence1
#901red gummi ingot4
#21red-spotted snapper roe1
#162rib of the Bonerdagon10
#10rose-colored glasses1
#369rusty chain necklace7
🥇rxr shield1
#238sandwich of the gods15
#81shining halo1
#160shiny ring141
#31sinistral homunculus1
#511sleazy bindle1
🥉slippery when wet shield1
#552solid gold bowling ball32
#106spandex anniversary shorts1
#103spark plug earring8
#441spectre scepter74
🥈speed limit shield1
#392spooky hockey mask4
#672stained mattress1
#8stapler bear27
🥇stop shield1
#410stuffed Hodgman1
#91stuffed teddy butler292
#75tasteful black bow tie1
#11teddy bear443
#41teddy borg189
🥇time sleigh1
#999tiny bottle of absinthe1
#4480tiny plastic bitchin' meatcar1
#5tiny plastic fluffy bunny2,464
#165towel56
#34training scroll: Shattering Punch1
#48training scroll: Shivering Monkey Technique1
#38training scroll: Snokebomb1
#20unopened Bird-a-Day calendar1
#20unopened diabolic pizza cube box1
#131vertebra of the Bonerdagon69
#54volcanic ash125
#297warbear empathy chip1
#435warbear metalworking primer1
#307wrench bracelet11
#229yellow drunki-bear1
#834yellow gummi ingot8
🥇yield shield1
#1018zombie pineal gland4

Wow, that's 349,538 items total!

what items are this player missing?