| #141 | Ambitious Turkey | 1 |
| #1220 | Argarggagarg's fang | 1 |
| #62 | Artist's Butterknife of Regret | 1 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #618 | BURT | 1 |
| #30 | Bastille Battalion Fondue Trophy | 1 |
| #48 | Bettie page | 1 |
| #811 | Blizzards I Have Died In | 1 |
| #39 | Boltsmann ID badge | 1 |
| #342 | Boozehounds Anonymous token | 1 |
| 🥈 | Byte | 1 |
| #163 | Cerebral Cloche | 1 |
| #311 | Cerebral Crossbow | 1 |
| #188 | Cerebral Culottes | 1 |
| #194 | Cheer-Up soda | 1 |
| #90 | Chinese curse words | 1 |
| #610 | Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife | 1 |
| #280 | Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration | 1 |
| #399 | Cookbook of the Damned | 1 |
| #1479 | Crimbo Candy Cookbook | 1 |
| #359 | Crimbonium fuel rod | 1 |
| 🥇 | Crimbuccaneer war standard | 1 |
| #205 | Dust bunny | 1 |
| #79 | Elf Guard strategic map | 1 |
| 🥇 | Elf Guard war standard | 1 |
| #38 | Fabiotion | 1 |
| #1004 | Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots | 1 |
| #180 | GameInformPowerDailyPro magazine | 1 |
| #276 | Gazpacho's Glacial Grimoire | 1 |
| #85 | Gold Velvet™ whiskey | 1 |
| #338 | Gummi-DNA | 1 |
| #601 | Haunted Sorority House staff guide | 1 |
| #1139 | Heimandatz's heart | 1 |
| #122 | How to Avoid Scams | 1 |
| #59 | Irish Coffee, English Heart | 1 |
| #1281 | Jocko Homo's head | 1 |
| #836 | Kissin' Cousins | 1 |
| #487 | L.I.M.P. Stock Certificate | 1 |
| #1061 | Let Me Be! | 1 |
| #17 | Lolsipop | 91 |
| #304 | Mae West | 1 |
| #260 | Mae West with a fly in it | 1 |
| #174 | Mer-kin healscroll | 1 |
| #192 | Mer-kin killscroll | 1 |
| #90 | Middle of the Road™ brand whiskey | 1 |
| #88 | Mint Yulep | 1 |
| #167 | My First Art of War | 1 |
| #48 | My First Paycheck envelope | 1 |
| #471 | Necrotelicomnicon | 1 |
| #38 | Newark | 1 |
| #324 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter IV | 1 |
| #312 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter V | 1 |
| #40 | O'RLY manual | 69 |
| #116 | Othello's dagger | 1 |
| #99 | Othello's handkerchief | 1 |
| #98 | Othello's military jacket | 1 |
| #177 | Racisto Ruidoso | 1 |
| #1461 | Retenez L'Herbe Paté | 1 |
| #1068 | Safari Jack's moustache | 1 |
| #974 | Sensual Massage for Creeps | 1 |
| #208 | Squat-Thrust Magazine | 1 |
| #154 | Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword | 1 |
| #778 | Taco Dan's Taco Stand Chillacious Churro | 1 |
| #938 | Tales from the Fireside | 1 |
| #68 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) | 1 |
| #851 | The Big Book of Pirate Insults | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #5 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #1032 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 1 |
| #57 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #1558 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 1 |
| #970 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 1 |
| #403 | Thwaitgold chigger statuette | 1 |
| #1400 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 1 |
| #1722 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 1 |
| #247 | Thwaitgold masked hunter statuette | 1 |
| #307 | Thwaitgold metabug statuette | 1 |
| #605 | Thwaitgold mosquito statuette | 1 |
| #432 | Thwaitgold nymph statuette | 1 |
| #1280 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 1 |
| #653 | Thwaitgold scorpion statuette | 1 |
| #1150 | Thwaitgold woollybear statuette | 1 |
| #37 | Time Lord Participation Mug | 1 |
| #23 | Xiblaxian space-whiskey | 1 |
| #1114 | Yakisoba's hat | 1 |
| #233 | Ye Olde Bawdy Limerick | 1 |
| #217 | Ye Olde Medieval Insult | 1 |
| #24 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used) | 1 |
| #618 | alphabet gum | 1 |
| #69 | anger blaster | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary pewter cape | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary tiny latex mask | 1 |
| #116 | antimatter wad | 1 |
| #297 | black and white cracker | 1 |
| #103 | black tear | 1 |
| #217 | blob of Alphredo™ | 1 |
| #211 | blue grass | 1 |
| #88 | blue mana | 1 |
| #145 | blue money bag | 1 |
| #415 | bottle of Domesticated Turkey | 1 |
| #85 | bottle of norwhiskey | 1 |
| #1505 | bottle of whiskey | 1 |
| #12 | bowl of petunias | 1 |
| #39 | brass abacus | 1 |
| #205 | brilliant oyster egg | 1 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #145 | can-you-dig-it? | 1 |
| #146 | caret | 1 |
| #128 | cheer extractor | 1 |
| #747 | clockwork key | 1 |
| #402 | collection of tiny spooky objects | 1 |
| #84 | compounded experience | 1 |
| #216 | corpsebite | 1 |
| #159 | crazy hobo notebook | 1 |
| #102 | creepy nursery rhyme | 1 |
| #363 | crumbling rat skull | 1 |
| #200 | cube of billiard chalk | 1 |
| #454 | cursed dirty joke scroll | 1 |
| #377 | cursed piece of thirteen | 1 |
| #129 | cursed wishbone | 1 |
| #313 | cylindrical mold | 1 |
| #179 | decanter of fine Scotch | 1 |
| #81 | dented spoon | 1 |
| #208 | devilish folio | 1 |
| #788 | disintegrating quill pen | 1 |
| #68 | doubt cannon | 1 |
| #813 | drab sonata | 1 |
| #94 | dry cleaning receipt | 1 |
| #58 | eaves droppers | 1 |
| #547 | electrical thingamabob | 1 |
| #147 | eleven-foot pole | 1 |
| #130 | eternal car battery | 1 |
| #295 | executive mime flask | 1 |
| #1944 | facsimile dictionary | 1 |
| #62 | fear condenser | 1 |
| #77 | finger exerciser | 1 |
| #271 | flask of mining oil | 1 |
| #63 | flask of port | 1 |
| #215 | freezer-burned frost-bitten tortellini | 1 |
| #603 | fuzzbump | 1 |
| #92 | gift card | 1 |
| #809 | gingerbread robot | 1 |
| #198 | glass of bourbon | 1 |
| #209 | gleaming oyster egg | 1 |
| #218 | glistening oyster egg | 1 |
| #152 | glow-in-the-dark stuffed burrowgrub | 1 |
| #205 | gold Boozehounds Anonymous token | 1 |
| #30 | great old fashioned | 1 |
| #49 | green mana | 8 |
| #171 | green rocket | 1 |
| #102 | grim fairy tale | 1 |
| 🥇 | hand-knitted Crimbo socks | 1 |
| #183 | handful of Crotchety Pine needles | 1 |
| #210 | handful of crafty noodles | 1 |
| #64 | heart cozy | 1 |
| #61 | heart-shaped candy whetstone | 1 |
| #36 | heather graham cracker | 1 |
| #159 | heavy leather-bound tome | 1 |
| #454 | heavy metal sonata | 1 |
| #102 | hermit factoid | 1 |
| #26 | hipster cocktail | 1 |
| #183 | hobo fortress blueprints | 1 |
| #194 | hunk of granite | 1 |
| #139 | ivory cue ball | 1 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #365 | jewelry-making pliers | 1 |
| #498 | kickback cookbook | 1 |
| #172 | killing jar | 1 |
| #48 | little piece of steel | 1 |
| #209 | little round pebble | 1 |
| #100 | live nautical mine | 1 |
| #227 | lumbering jack | 1 |
| #192 | lump of Saccharine Maple sap | 1 |
| #19 | lump of bauxite | 1 |
| #192 | lustrous oyster egg | 1 |
| #106 | mafia filofax | 1 |
| #205 | magnificent oyster egg | 1 |
| #127 | mime army camouflage kit | 1 |
| #227 | mime army rations | 1 |
| #205 | mime army wine | 1 |
| #72 | mime pocket probe | 1 |
| 🥇 | mime-proof sunglasses | 1 |
| #79 | nail file | 1 |
| #47 | neg grog | 1 |
| #290 | nega-mushroom | 1 |
| 🥇 | novelty monorail ticket | 1 |
| #418 | nugget of Crimbonium | 1 |
| #860 | nut-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |
| #3387 | obsidian dagger | 1 |
| #107 | odd silver coin | 1 |
| #94 | old love note | 1 |
| #255 | old-fashioned | 1 |
| #1886 | oyster basket | 1 |
| #403 | paranormal ricotta | 1 |
| #238 | pearlescent oyster egg | 1 |
| #140 | pencil stub | 1 |
| #83 | perfect old-fashioned | 1 |
| #55 | personal graffiti kit | 1 |
| #787 | petit 4.1 | 1 |
| #2030 | phish stick | 1 |
| #745 | picture of a dead guy's girlfriend | 1 |
| #99 | pixel power cell | 1 |
| #1284 | plot hole | 1 |
| #848 | powdered candy sushi set | 1 |
| #614 | quasi-ethereal macaroni fragments | 1 |
| 🥈 | record of infuriating silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | record of menacing silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | record of tranquil silence (used) | 1 |
| #144 | red book | 1 |
| #103 | red foxglove | 1 |
| #118 | red letter | 1 |
| #72 | red mana | 1 |
| #205 | red money bag | 1 |
| #105 | red-hot boilermaker | 1 |
| #61 | regret hose | 1 |
| #41 | replica Elf Guard medal | 1 |
| #17 | ring of the Skeleton Lord | 1 |
| #90 | rodeo whiskey | 1 |
| #493 | roll in the hay | 1 |
| #97 | roll of meat | 1 |
| #449 | ruby on canes | 1 |
| #210 | rusty hedge trimmers | 1 |
| #15 | scepter of the Skeleton Lord | 1 |
| #206 | scintillating oyster egg | 1 |
| #167 | scotch on the rocks | 1 |
| #558 | scroll of ancient forbidden unspeakable evil | 1 |
| #1295 | scroll of drastic healing | 1 |
| #1479 | scroll of pasta summoning | 1 |
| #201 | security flashlight | 1 |
| #279 | sensitive poetry journal | 1 |
| #14 | shield of the Skeleton Lord | 1 |
| #478 | shimmering tendrils | 1 |
| 🥇 | shiny stones | 20,535 |
| #125 | short writ of habeas corpus | 1 |
| #196 | shovelful of dirt | 1 |
| #325 | shushed potatoes | 1 |
| 🥇 | silent nightlight | 1 |
| #411 | six tiny wedges of goat cheese | 1 |
| #240 | sleeve deuce | 1 |
| #176 | slime convention coupons | 1 |
| #183 | slime convention flyers | 1 |
| #132 | smellbook | 1 |
| #16 | smooth velvet pocket square | 1 |
| #258 | smudged alchemical recipe | 1 |
| #27 | soilzerac | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #1368 | spooky cosmetics bag | 1 |
| #207 | spoonful of Linguine-Os | 1 |
| #918 | star chart | 1 |
| #234 | still-beating spleen | 1 |
| #89 | stuffed kraken | 1 |
| #898 | sweet mochi ball | 1 |
| #212 | tangled mass of creepy pasta | 1 |
| #773 | tattered scrap of paper | 1 |
| #536 | teeny-tiny magic scroll | 1 |
| #339 | terrible poem | 1 |
| #450 | thermos full of Knob coffee | 1 |
| #40 | tonic o' Banderas | 1 |
| #78 | toy sixgun | 1 |
| #91 | triad summoning scroll | 1 |
| #55 | trick coin | 2 |
| #1908 | useless powder | 1 |
| #108 | valuable coin | 1 |
| #75 | very fancy whiskey | 1 |
| #192 | viral DNA | 1 |
| #264 | wand of pigification | 1 |
| #252 | warbear bearserker potion | 1 |
| #436 | warbear beeping telegram | 1 |
| 🥈 | warbear hoverbelt | 1 |
| #45 | warbear metalworking primer (used) | 1 |
| #422 | warbear robo-camouflage unit | 1 |
| #646 | whiskey and cola | 1 |
| #411 | whiskey and soda | 1 |
| #247 | whiskey in a broken glass | 1 |
| #631 | whiskey sour | 1 |
| #32 | whiskey squeeze | 1 |
| #187 | white money bag | 1 |
| #112 | white page | 1 |
| #71 | witch's bread | 1 |