| #15 | "meat" stick | 1,116 |
| #137 | Angry Farmer candy | 1,323 |
| #3370 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 2 |
| #950 | Bonerdagon necklace | 10 |
| #1169 | Boss Bat britches | 10 |
| #102 | Brimstone Boxers | 1 |
| #1558 | Codpiece of the Goblin King | 3 |
| #882 | Copper Alpha of Sincerity | 2 |
| #784 | Corpse Island iced tea | 6 |
| #1491 | Crown of the Goblin King | 14 |
| #318 | Danglin' Chad's loincloth | 2 |
| #607 | Drowsy Sword | 29 |
| #41 | Flaskfull of Hollow | 633 |
| 🥈 | Gene Tonic: Construct | 92 |
| #15 | Gene Tonic: Weird | 9 |
| #203 | Imp Ale | 1,137 |
| #821 | Iron Beta of Industry | 6 |
| #75 | Lord Soggyraven's Slippers | 5 |
| #1215 | Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet | 20 |
| #13 | Mariner's Friend cough drops | 425 |
| #174 | Mick's IcyVapoHotness Rub | 520 |
| #14 | New Age healing crystal | 7,250 |
| #686 | Nickel Gamma of Frugality | 6 |
| #412 | Orange Star of Sacrifice | 5 |
| #212 | Ralph IX cognac | 1 |
| #390 | Slow Talkin' Elliot's dogtags | 2 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #970 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 1 |
| #1400 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 1 |
| #259 | Thwaitgold nit statuette | 1 |
| #233 | Thwaitgold quantum bug statuette | 8 |
| #521 | Thwaitgold spider statuette | 5 |
| #273 | Warm Subject gift certificate | 425 |
| #538 | Yellow Moon of Compassion | 6 |
| #611 | Zim Merman's guitar | 1 |
| #653 | Zinc Delta of Tranquility | 2 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary pewter cape | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary tiny latex mask | 1 |
| #170 | asbestos sword hilt | 1 |
| #205 | awful poetry journal | 909 |
| #82 | bätzle | 31 |
| #1848 | badass belt | 29 |
| #1445 | battered Crimbo Crate | 2 |
| #8 | beard incense | 533 |
| #170 | beaten-up Chucks | 3 |
| #687 | beholed bedsheet | 1 |
| #24 | bellhop bell | 47 |
| #84 | big rock | 38 |
| #297 | blob-shaped Crimbo cookie | 21 |
| #71 | bottle of Bloodweiser | 2 |
| #40 | bottle of black cat tonic | 43 |
| #1287 | bottle of goofballs | 19 |
| #9 | bottle of lighter fluid | 919 |
| #225 | bottle of rum | 323 |
| #13 | bottled inspiration | 263 |
| #5 | bowl of marinade | 413 |
| #3783 | box of sunshine | 16 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #176 | burnt flower | 57 |
| #4 | camouflage T-shirt | 9 |
| #72 | cast | 783 |
| #253 | chaos butterfly | 1,056 |
| #96 | cherry | 107 |
| #504 | cocoa eggshell fragment | 80 |
| #276 | coconut shell | 202 |
| #58 | cold wad | 136 |
| #12 | compression stocking | 2,842 |
| #1465 | corpse on the beach | 2 |
| #733 | corpsedriver | 6 |
| #1462 | corpsetini | 2 |
| #56 | delectable fire ant | 34 |
| #17 | delicious shimmering moth | 619 |
| #62 | delicious stinkbug | 42 |
| #620 | disassembled clover | 64 |
| #15 | disintegrating spiky collar | 63 |
| #29 | distilled fortified wine | 95 |
| #266 | disturbing fanfic | 659 |
| #229 | divine champagne popper | 26 |
| #6 | dollop of barbecue sauce | 405 |
| #243 | dry noodles | 544 |
| #1578 | dusty Crimbo crate | 1 |
| #232 | empty Cloaca-Cola bottle | 60 |
| #377 | fancy canapés | 1 |
| #1374 | fat stacks of cash | 1 |
| #40 | frost flower | 29 |
| #210 | furry fur | 698 |
| #51 | fuzzbump | 128 |
| #697 | gearbox necklace | 1 |
| #95 | giant needle | 1,147 |
| #233 | gingerbread mutant bugbear | 14 |
| #5 | glass of herbal tequila | 457 |
| #28 | gold tooth | 21 |
| #1341 | grue egg | 19 |
| #218 | grungy flannel shirt | 3 |
| #49 | handful of Smithereens | 157 |
| #1180 | handful of confetti | 34 |
| #193 | handful of sand | 116 |
| #138 | heavy D | 1,074 |
| #316 | hellion cube | 20 |
| #15 | hot ashes | 264 |
| #94 | hot wad | 107 |
| #29 | ice harvest | 661 |
| #56 | interesting-looking twig | 152 |
| #302 | invisible bag | 3 |
| #495 | irradiated candy cane | 8 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #42 | jumbo olive | 128 |
| #208 | lemon | 329 |
| #39 | library card | 35 |
| #91 | lime | 213 |
| #11 | liquid smoke | 293 |
| #312 | little paper umbrella | 227 |
| #279 | longhaired hippy wig | 2 |
| #565 | lovecat tail | 1 |
| #53 | lump of Brituminous coal | 221 |
| #239 | magical ice cubes | 236 |
| #85 | minin' dynamite | 17 |
| #19 | nastygeist | 124 |
| #4 | nurse's hat | 354 |
| #990 | obsidian dagger | 17 |
| #210 | oozenog | 14 |
| #227 | orange | 128 |
| #434 | orange peel hat | 1 |
| #139 | original G | 1,147 |
| #15 | outlaw bandana | 61 |
| #4 | pair of plants | 5 |
| #42 | patent antipsychotics | 41 |
| #16 | pill cup | 4,209 |
| #26 | plaid cowboy hat | 23 |
| #212 | plexiglass pendant | 1 |
| #204 | plot hole | 1,027 |
| #23 | plump juicy grub | 658 |
| #51 | pocket ace | 9 |
| #1607 | pork elf goodies sack | 1 |
| #8 | portable table | 181 |
| #127 | potion of temporary gr8ness | 14 |
| #663 | pretty flower | 88 |
| #89 | probability potion | 1,235 |
| #76 | procrastination potion | 1,420 |
| #423 | purple snowcone | 30 |
| #62 | quantum of familiar | 8 |
| #48 | rattler rattle | 40 |
| #123 | rave whistle | 78 |
| #790 | really dense meat stack | 7 |
| #67 | resolution: be feistier | 143 |
| #51 | resolution: be happier | 123 |
| #38 | resolution: be kinder | 51 |
| #52 | resolution: be luckier | 42 |
| #53 | resolution: be more adventurous | 20 |
| #70 | resolution: be sexier | 104 |
| #64 | resolution: be smarter | 133 |
| #66 | resolution: be stronger | 122 |
| #42 | resolution: be wealthier | 132 |
| #1653 | rigid carapace | 1 |
| #182 | roll in the hay | 20 |
| #14 | rusted-out shootin' iron | 36 |
| #550 | sawblade shield | 4 |
| #378 | scented massage oil | 3 |
| #104 | scratch 'n' sniff UPC sticker | 218 |
| #137 | scratch 'n' sniff apple sticker | 216 |
| #135 | scratch 'n' sniff dragon sticker | 237 |
| #129 | scratch 'n' sniff rock band sticker | 225 |
| #122 | scratch 'n' sniff unicorn sticker | 190 |
| #125 | scratch 'n' sniff wrestler sticker | 218 |
| #62 | scrumptious ice ant | 15 |
| #237 | scrumptious reagent | 537 |
| #139 | serum of sarcasm | 15 |
| 🥉 | shaker of dry rub | 682 |
| #9 | shot of mescal | 294 |
| #22 | shot of nepenthe schnapps | 43 |
| #110 | single atom | 11 |
| #64 | sleaze wad | 130 |
| #45 | sleeve deuce | 187 |
| #21 | smoker's cloak | 2 |
| #26 | snow berries | 581 |
| #1092 | solid gold bowling ball | 11 |
| #58 | spaghetti with Skullheads | 21 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #669 | spark plug earring | 1 |
| #10 | specialty ammo bandolier | 991 |
| #1360 | spectre scepter | 20 |
| #94 | spices | 689 |
| #1479 | spooky hockey mask | 1 |
| #25 | spooky lasso | 84 |
| #68 | spooky wad | 103 |
| #993 | stainless steel scarf | 3 |
| #1399 | stainless steel shillelagh | 3 |
| #707 | stainless steel skullcap | 5 |
| #1337 | stainless steel slacks | 3 |
| #505 | stainless steel solitaire | 6 |
| #929 | stainless steel suspenders | 4 |
| #100 | stench wad | 113 |
| #185 | strawberry | 149 |
| #1453 | sturdy Crimbo crate | 3 |
| #69 | super salad | 10 |
| #74 | tangarita | 10 |
| #57 | tasty louse | 34 |
| #10 | the most dangerous bait | 1,018 |
| #217 | thin black candle | 1,276 |
| #88 | tiny bottle of absinthe | 352 |
| #4228 | tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #369 | tiny plastic Mob Penguin | 3 |
| #5 | tiny plastic Wu Tang the Betrayer | 256 |
| #334 | tiny plastic chunk of depleted Grimacite | 3 |
| #354 | tiny plastic fat stack of cash | 3 |
| #368 | tiny plastic mutant elf | 3 |
| #1557 | tiny plastic skeletal reindeer | 1 |
| #318 | tiny plastic strand of DNA | 3 |
| #12 | transdermal smoke patch | 731 |
| #132 | tube sock | 4 |
| #834 | twitching claw | 6 |
| #104 | unfortunate dumplings | 5 |
| #1870 | unstable DNA | 8 |
| #355 | valuable trinket | 255 |
| #8 | whiskey in a broken glass | 441 |
| #19 | white Xanadian | 69 |
| #62 | wolf mask | 956 |
| #255 | woven baling wire bracelets | 4 |
| #229 | wreath of laurels | 3 |
| #694 | wrench bracelet | 3 |
| #46 | yummy death watch beetle | 84 |