| #651 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes | 1 |
| 🥇 | Anniversary Miniature Sword & Martini Guy | 1 |
| #1502 | Bulky Buddy Box | 1 |
| #469 | CRIMBCO scrip | 530 |
| #2422 | CRIMBCOIDS mints | 1 |
| #2423 | CRIMBCOLOAF | 1 |
| #287 | Cinco Mayo Lager | 1 |
| #399 | Cookbook of the Damned | 1 |
| #1479 | Crimbo Candy Cookbook | 1 |
| #1349 | Crimbo candied pecan | 1 |
| #1380 | Crimbo fudge | 1 |
| #1364 | Crimbo peppermint bark | 1 |
| #1153 | Dickory Farms Gift Basket | 3 |
| #493 | El Vibrato power sphere | 1 |
| #1004 | Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots | 1 |
| 🥈 | General Assembly Module | 3 |
| #1192 | Instant Karma | 1 |
| #147 | Knob jelly donut | 1 |
| #235 | Knob nuts | 1 |
| #813 | La Hebilla del Cinturón de Lopez | 1 |
| #776 | Lederhosen of the Night | 1 |
| 🥇 | Lord Flameface's cloak | 1 |
| #884 | Loudmouth Larry Lamprey | 1 |
| #396 | Miniborg beeper | 1 |
| #362 | Miniborg hiveminder | 1 |
| #394 | Miniborg laser | 1 |
| #443 | Miniborg stomper | 1 |
| #405 | Miniborg strangler | 1 |
| #617 | Pick-O-Matic lockpicks | 1 |
| #770 | Red Rover BB gun | 1 |
| #1049 | Schrödinger's thermos | 1 |
| 🥈 | Stabonic scroll | 1 |
| #601 | The Art of Slapfighting | 1 |
| #852 | The Big Book of Pirate Insults | 1 |
| #1032 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #260 | Tiger-lily's milk | 2 |
| #1250 | Uncle Crimbo's Rations | 1 |
| 🥇 | Uncle Crimbo's Sack | 1 |
| #700 | Uncle Romulus | 1 |
| #776 | Workytime Tea | 1 |
| #663 | acid-squirting flower | 3 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary pewter cape | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary tiny latex mask | 1 |
| #734 | antique 8-Bit Power magazine | 1 |
| #623 | antique bottle opener | 1 |
| #533 | antique painting of a landscape | 1 |
| #572 | antique pair of blue jeans | 1 |
| #608 | antique record album | 3 |
| #586 | antique souvenir drawing | 1 |
| #1127 | awful poetry journal | 20 |
| #753 | bag of lard | 1 |
| #1218 | baggie of powdered sugar | 1 |
| #901 | baseball | 1 |
| #146 | big glob of skin | 1 |
| #774 | big red clown nose | 3 |
| #81 | big slimy cyst | 3 |
| #1124 | black paisley oyster egg | 4 |
| #609 | black pension check | 1 |
| #587 | black striped oyster egg | 9 |
| 🥇 | blank note | 1 |
| #924 | blob-shaped Crimbo cookie | 7 |
| #944 | bone chips | 1 |
| #981 | borg sock monkey | 1 |
| #954 | bottle of Blank-Out | 1 |
| #118 | boulder | 19 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #295 | bucket of honey | 2 |
| #1626 | buckyball | 1 |
| #2151 | can of CRIMBCOLA | 1 |
| #131 | can of depilatory cream | 1 |
| #593 | can of maces | 1 |
| #80 | can of sterno | 3 |
| #1564 | candy kneecapping stick | 2 |
| #1468 | candy knuckles | 2 |
| #241 | candy skeleton | 1 |
| 🥈 | carbonite visor | 1 |
| #2110 | chunk of depleted Grimacite | 1 |
| #653 | clown shoes | 2 |
| #3271 | club necklace | 1 |
| #27 | coal paperweight | 1 |
| #433 | coffin lid | 2 |
| #20 | collection of tiny spooky objects | 109 |
| #920 | cyborg doll | 1 |
| #1294 | dead guy's watch | 1 |
| #179 | decanter of fine Scotch | 1 |
| #153 | detective skull | 1 |
| 🥇 | detour shield | 1 |
| #1253 | disturbing fanfic | 13 |
| #428 | divine noisemaker | 5 |
| #1606 | dollhive | 1 |
| #264 | dragon snaps | 2 |
| #355 | evil golden arches | 1 |
| #95 | expensive cigar | 2 |
| #530 | fairy gravy boat | 1 |
| #1989 | fake fake vomit | 1 |
| #1010 | fake plastic grass | 1 |
| #137 | fancy beef jerky | 1 |
| #412 | fancy chocolate car | 7 |
| #923 | fancy opera glasses | 1 |
| #154 | fat bottom quark | 13 |
| #159 | fat wallet | 3 |
| #2393 | felt | 1 |
| #324 | fettucini Inconnu | 1 |
| #257 | flimsy clipboard | 1 |
| #576 | frozen Mob Penguin | 1 |
| #1335 | gingerbread mutant bugbear | 4 |
| #118 | gun cleaning kit | 1 |
| #150 | hair of the calf | 1 |
| #5198 | handful of confetti | 1 |
| #430 | happiness | 3 |
| #571 | harem girl t-shirt | 1 |
| #3380 | heart necklace | 1 |
| #123 | heart of rock and roll | 1 |
| #1673 | heart of the volcano | 1 |
| #159 | heavy leather-bound tome | 1 |
| 🥈 | hi-density nylocite leg armor | 1 |
| #969 | iGoogly | 10 |
| #2407 | irradiated candy cane | 2 |
| #139 | ivory cue ball | 1 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #734 | jawbruiser | 4 |
| 🥈 | kevlateflocite helmet | 1 |
| #1898 | kneecapping stick | 1 |
| 🥈 | laser targeting chip | 1 |
| #737 | laser-broiled pear | 12 |
| #201 | leather bookmark | 1 |
| #627 | licorice garrote | 4 |
| #1457 | mafia aria | 5 |
| #90 | mariachi toothpaste | 1 |
| #575 | marionette collective | 1 |
| #2027 | monomolecular yo-yo | 1 |
| #1681 | mylar scout drone | 1 |
| #2528 | nanite-infested candy cane | 3 |
| #842 | nanite-infested eggnog | 6 |
| #1965 | nanite-infested fruitcake | 3 |
| #3426 | nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #676 | old leather wallet | 1 |
| 🥇 | old-fashioned Crimbo Pressie | 1 |
| #601 | oozenog | 6 |
| #203 | overcookie | 1 |
| #1558 | pack of KWE trading card | 1 |
| #1215 | paperclip | 1 |
| #141 | paperclip sproinger | 1 |
| #282 | party hat | 10 |
| #38 | pawn cookie | 21 |
| #290 | philosopher's scone | 1 |
| #102 | pipe wrench | 1 |
| 🥈 | plexifoam chin strap | 1 |
| 🥈 | polymorphic fastening apparatus | 1 |
| #1026 | portable photocopier | 1 |
| #450 | poultrygeist | 1 |
| #282 | powdered donut | 2 |
| #74 | raisin | 9 |
| #121 | recording of Benetton's Medley of Diversity | 1 |
| #125 | recording of Chorale of Companionship | 1 |
| #138 | recording of Donho's Bubbly Ballad | 1 |
| #120 | recording of Elron's Explosive Etude | 1 |
| #107 | recording of Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration | 1 |
| #115 | recording of Prelude of Precision | 1 |
| #50 | recording of Rolando's Rondo of Resisto | 1 |
| #144 | recording of The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder | 1 |
| #174 | red wagon | 2 |
| #668 | robotronic egg | 43 |
| 🥇 | rxr shield | 1 |
| 🥈 | set of Unobtainium straps | 1 |
| 🥈 | silicon-infused gluteal shield | 1 |
| #113 | silver cheese-slicer | 1 |
| #101 | silver paté knife | 1 |
| #134 | silver salt-shaker | 1 |
| #33 | six tiny wedges of goat cheese | 67 |
| #534 | sk8board | 1 |
| #107 | sleep mask | 1 |
| 🥉 | slippery when wet shield | 1 |
| #208 | snapdragon pistil | 1 |
| #94 | sock garters | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #255 | spangly sombrero | 1 |
| #1391 | spectral pickle | 1 |
| #13 | squirmy violent party snack | 17 |
| #1321 | stray chihuahua | 1 |
| #816 | ten-leaf clover | 5 |
| #50 | tiny fly glasses | 5 |
| #33 | tiny frozen prehistoric meteorite jawbreaker | 5 |
| #40 | tiny goth giant | 3 |
| #649 | tiny plastic 11 Dealer | 1 |
| #620 | tiny plastic Crimbo Casino | 1 |
| #577 | tiny plastic Crimbomination | 1 |
| #632 | tiny plastic Don Crimbo | 1 |
| #991 | tiny plastic chunk of depleted Grimacite | 1 |
| #44 | tiny plastic sea elf | 1 |
| #585 | tiny plastic stocking mimic | 1 |
| #900 | toy deathbot | 1 |
| #701 | toy hoverpad | 15 |
| #921 | toy maglev monorail | 1 |
| #1987 | unstable laser battery | 26 |
| #35 | velcro paddle ball | 1 |
| #261 | whalebone corset | 1 |
| #1937 | whoopie cushion | 1 |
| #931 | wolf mask | 4 |
| #30 | world's most unappetizing beverage | 4 |
| #478 | yohohoyo | 2 |