| #22 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes (used) | 1 |
| #12 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #9 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #10 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #967 | A. W. O. L. commendation | 1 |
| #432 | Asleep in the Cemetery | 4 |
| #437 | Atomic Comic | 1 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #684 | BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt | 1 |
| #733 | BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt | 1 |
| #1046 | BGE merchandise order form | 1 |
| #564 | BGE pocket calendar | 1 |
| #1448 | BGE shotglass | 1 |
| #675 | BGE temporary tattoo | 1 |
| #956 | BGE tiny plastic toy | 1 |
| #295 | BRAINS shorts | 2 |
| 🥈 | Big Candy's tophat | 1 |
| #121 | Blizzards I Have Died In | 6 |
| #533 | Bone's Farm "wine" | 1 |
| #265 | Boozehounds Anonymous token | 2 |
| #5 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 2 |
| #5 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 2 |
| #5 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 2 |
| 🥉 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) | 2 |
| 🥉 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) | 2 |
| #529 | CRIMBCO lanyard | 1 |
| #917 | CRIMBCO mug | 10 |
| #1702 | CRIMBCO scrip | 5 |
| #873 | CRIMBCO wine | 8 |
| #2126 | CRIMBCOIDS mints | 2 |
| #1189 | CRIMBCOLOAF | 4 |
| #280 | Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration | 1 |
| #907 | Crimbo Candy Cookbook | 4 |
| #676 | Crimbo Credit | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Mathematical Precision (dirty) | 1 |
| 🥈 | Crimbot ROM: Rapid Prototyping (dirty) | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Ruthless Efficiency (dirty) | 1 |
| #75 | Crimbot battery | 30 |
| #841 | Dickory Farms Gift Basket | 6 |
| #652 | Elf Farm Raffle ticket | 1 |
| #16 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #81 | Ellsbury's skull | 1 |
| #833 | FDKOL commendation | 8 |
| #1004 | Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots | 1 |
| #13 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy (shredded) | 1 |
| #68 | Gazpacho's Glacial Grimoire | 5 |
| #399 | Haunted Sorority House staff guide | 6 |
| 🥉 | Hjodor's Guide to Arctic Dalmatians (used) | 1 |
| #836 | Kissin' Cousins | 1 |
| #1061 | Let Me Be! | 1 |
| #154 | Massive Manual of Marauder Mockery | 2 |
| #324 | Mesmereyes™ contact lenses | 2 |
| #274 | NPZR chemistry set | 15 |
| #165 | Necrotelicomnicon | 4 |
| #367 | Nightstalker perfume | 2 |
| #366 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter I | 1 |
| #385 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter II | 1 |
| #377 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter III | 1 |
| #324 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter IV | 1 |
| #312 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter V | 1 |
| #316 | Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter VI | 1 |
| #512 | Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster | 13 |
| #282 | Sinful Desires | 2 |
| #7 | Spelunker of Fortune (used) | 1 |
| #626 | Summer Nights | 2 |
| #73 | Super Crimboman Ultra Mega Hypersword | 3 |
| #7 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) | 2 |
| #21 | The Art of Slapfighting (used) | 1 |
| #681 | The Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones | 1 |
| #5 | The Big Book of Communism (used) | 1 |
| #851 | The Big Book of Pirate Insults | 1 |
| #470 | The Cooler Out of Space | 2 |
| #5 | The Joy of Wassailing (used) | 2 |
| #57 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 1 |
| #79 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 27 |
| #829 | Thwaitgold ant statuette | 1 |
| #287 | Thwaitgold bee statuette | 7 |
| #828 | Thwaitgold bookworm statuette | 1 |
| #28 | Thwaitgold butterfly statuette | 11 |
| #209 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 6 |
| #11 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 58 |
| #26 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 23 |
| #395 | Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette | 7 |
| #1783 | Thwaitgold maggot statuette | 1 |
| #17 | Thwaitgold nit statuette | 6 |
| #74 | Thwaitgold praying mantis statuette | 6 |
| #694 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 5 |
| #123 | Thwaitgold scorpion statuette | 9 |
| #45 | Thwaitgold spider statuette | 25 |
| #457 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 15 |
| #1242 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 1 |
| #516 | Thwaitgold wheel bug statuette | 1 |
| #1150 | Thwaitgold woollybear statuette | 1 |
| #418 | Travels with Jerry | 3 |
| #101 | Twelve Night Energy | 3 |
| #103 | Ultrasoldier Serum | 13 |
| #22 | Uncle Romulus (used) | 1 |
| #24 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used) | 1 |
| #14 | alien source code printout (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | all-year sucker | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #714 | antique record album | 2 |
| #451 | aspirin | 2 |
| #669 | bath ball gift set | 7 |
| #138 | blank diary | 1 |
| #4253 | bottle of goofballs | 2 |
| #852 | bottle of single-barrel whiskey | 2 |
| #190 | bottled day | 1 |
| #2009 | box of sunshine | 67 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #472 | bunny liver | 9 |
| #140 | caustic slime nodule | 2 |
| #287 | chainsaw chain | 1 |
| #72 | choco-Crimbot | 49 |
| #68 | cinnamon troll doll | 1 |
| #735 | corrupted data | 1 |
| #813 | drab sonata | 1 |
| #363 | dwarvish magazine | 2 |
| #5 | elevent | 1 |
| #241 | empty agua de vida bottle | 861 |
| #654 | enchanted leopard-print barbell | 10 |
| #274 | extremely skinny jeans | 2 |
| #512 | facsimile dictionary | 20 |
| #175 | faded green protest sign | 1 |
| #144 | faded red protest sign | 1 |
| 🥈 | festive warbear bank | 1 |
| #733 | forbidden sausage | 2 |
| #62 | fudge pocket square | 1 |
| #317 | ghost trap | 2 |
| #408 | ghostly body paint | 6 |
| #149 | haiku katana | 1 |
| #1652 | handful of confetti | 22 |
| 🥇 | heart of dark chocolate | 1 |
| #544 | hideous egg | 2 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #41 | jingle bell | 1 |
| #498 | kickback cookbook | 1 |
| #84 | kumquartz ring | 1 |
| #226 | live lobster | 2 |
| #346 | molten brick | 10 |
| #533 | motivational poster | 8 |
| #598 | mysterious silver lapel pin | 1 |
| #330 | necrotizing body spray | 22 |
| #429 | pack of pogs | 46 |
| #49 | packet of orchid seeds | 3 |
| 🥉 | packet of pumpkin seeds | 1 |
| #140 | pair of pearidot earrings | 1 |
| #886 | paperclip | 10 |
| #78 | paperclip sproinger | 2 |
| #808 | party hat | 1 |
| #330 | phish stick | 3 |
| #414 | pile of gold coins | 2 |
| #119 | pirate brochure | 1 |
| #148 | pirate pamphlet | 1 |
| #131 | pirate tract | 1 |
| #530 | poltergeist-in-the-jar-o | 1 |
| #567 | portable photocopier | 10 |
| #436 | powdered candy sushi set | 4 |
| #347 | press-on ribs | 18 |
| 🥈 | record of infuriating silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | record of menacing silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | record of tranquil silence (used) | 1 |
| #146 | ridiculous cocktail | 11 |
| #857 | ridiculous sandwich | 1 |
| #65 | ridiculous sunglasses | 1 |
| #542 | sandwich of the gods | 13 |
| #581 | slow jam collection | 7 |
| #182 | soul doorbell | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #140 | spooky rattling cigar box | 1 |
| #701 | squirming egg sac | 7 |
| #106 | stapler bear | 1 |
| #126 | still-beating spleen | 5 |
| #374 | strange cube | 3 |
| #864 | sweet mochi ball | 2 |
| #432 | sweet-corn-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar | 2 |
| #908 | tourmalime | 1 |
| #106 | tourmalime tourniquet | 1 |
| 🥇 | wand of fudge control | 1 |
| #20 | warbear empathy chip (used) | 1 |
| #8 | warbear metalworking primer (used) | 2 |
| #337 | whisker pencil | 17 |