| #114 | "Humorous" T-shirt | 1 |
| #72 | Aluminum Epsilon of Humility | 4 |
| #2232 | Ancient Saucehelm | 1 |
| #789 | Argarggagarg's fang | 2 |
| #309 | Baron von Ratsworth's money clip | 2 |
| #4297 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 1 |
| #333 | Baron von Ratsworth's tophat | 7 |
| #271 | Blue Diamond of Honesty | 2 |
| #2384 | Bonerdagon necklace | 1 |
| #614 | Boss Bat bling | 5 |
| #2773 | Boss Bat britches | 1 |
| #40 | Brimstone Beret | 1 |
| #64 | Brimstone Bludgeon | 1 |
| #24 | Brimstone Bracelet | 1 |
| #32 | Brimstone Brooch | 1 |
| #40 | Brimstone Bunker | 1 |
| 🥈 | C.B.F.G. | 1 |
| #1117 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) | 1 |
| #1013 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) | 1 |
| #1054 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) | 1 |
| #1019 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) | 1 |
| #1008 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) | 1 |
| #2098 | CRIMBCO mug | 1 |
| #1940 | CRIMBCO wine | 1 |
| #2407 | Codpiece of the Goblin King | 1 |
| #2464 | Colander of Em-er'il | 1 |
| #6 | Crimbomination Contraption | 1 |
| #2254 | Crown of the Goblin King | 7 |
| #1538 | Dickory Farms Gift Basket | 1 |
| #589 | Drowsy Sword | 31 |
| #999 | Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues | 2 |
| #991 | Dyspepsi-Cola helmet | 2 |
| #1376 | Dyspepsi-Cola shield | 1 |
| #291 | Frat Army FGF | 9 |
| #777 | Galapagosian Cuisses | 1 |
| #461 | Genalen™ Bottle | 1 |
| #743 | Glass Balls of the Goblin King | 3 |
| #515 | Hippy Army MPE | 2 |
| #873 | Instant Karma | 3 |
| #894 | Iron Beta of Industry | 5 |
| #725 | Krakrox's Loincloth | 1 |
| #38 | Lead Zeta of Chastity | 3 |
| #858 | Lord Spookyraven's ear trumpet | 31 |
| #518 | Maxwell's Silver Hammer | 2 |
| #987 | Nickel Gamma of Frugality | 3 |
| #870 | Orange Star of Sacrifice | 2 |
| #101 | Purple Horseshoe of Honor | 2 |
| #127 | Red Balloon of Valor | 2 |
| #1076 | Safari Jack's moustache | 1 |
| #2542 | Scalp of Gorgolok | 1 |
| #465 | Supernova Champagne | 5 |
| #951 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #694 | Tuesday's ruby | 1 |
| 🥇 | Uncle Crimbo's Sack | 1 |
| #75 | Uranium Omega of Temperance | 3 |
| #1120 | Yakisoba's hat | 1 |
| #1568 | adorable seal larva | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #886 | antique greaves | 1 |
| #895 | antique helmet | 1 |
| #905 | antique shield | 1 |
| #946 | antique spear | 1 |
| #903 | asbestos ore | 3 |
| #1849 | baby killer bee | 1 |
| #1043 | badass belt | 52 |
| #1427 | bath ball gift set | 1 |
| #328 | beer-scented teddy bear | 1 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg helmet | 1 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg leg armor | 1 |
| #380 | black picnic basket | 2 |
| 🥈 | blue ribbon | 1 |
| #172 | bottle of Domesticated Turkey | 12 |
| #1178 | bottle of rum | 7 |
| #1148 | bottle of whiskey | 5 |
| #771 | bouquet of circular saw blades | 1 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #555 | can of Swiller | 1 |
| #422 | cheap toaster | 5 |
| #939 | chocolate-covered diamond-studded roses | 1 |
| #456 | cruelty-free wine | 2 |
| #516 | depleted uranium seal figurine | 1 |
| #698 | drywall axe | 16 |
| #1926 | duct tape | 3 |
| #768 | evil golden arch | 3 |
| #199 | extra-large palm-frond toupee | 1 |
| #411 | fancy chocolate car | 7 |
| #572 | fancy seashell necklace | 1 |
| #2392 | felt | 1 |
| #392 | figurine of a charred seal | 8 |
| #317 | figurine of a cold seal | 19 |
| #241 | figurine of a shadowy seal | 5 |
| #478 | figurine of a sleek seal | 3 |
| #107 | figurine of a slippery seal | 17 |
| #332 | figurine of a stinking seal | 6 |
| #332 | figurine of a wretched-looking seal | 2 |
| #160 | figurine of an ancient seal | 5 |
| #1000 | filthy corduroys | 1 |
| #970 | filthy knitted dread sack | 1 |
| #1610 | flashing novelty button | 1 |
| #776 | frightful feather | 1 |
| #1658 | fuzzy dice | 4 |
| #1640 | giant discarded bottlecap | 1 |
| #2409 | giant discarded plastic fork | 1 |
| #1516 | giant discarded torn-up glove | 1 |
| #1268 | giant pinky ring | 8 |
| #479 | gloomy black mushroom | 6 |
| #155 | gnauga hide buckler | 1 |
| #149 | gnauga hide chaps | 1 |
| #203 | gnauga hide whip | 1 |
| #1307 | handful of confetti | 30 |
| #399 | handful of walnuts | 2 |
| #506 | happiness | 2 |
| #1397 | heart of the volcano | 2 |
| #155 | holiday cheese log | 15 |
| #1282 | iron pasta spoon | 1 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #41 | jingle bell | 1 |
| #910 | ketchup hound | 1 |
| #790 | lucky rabbit's foot | 8 |
| #248 | makeshift cape | 1 |
| #181 | makeshift turban | 1 |
| #392 | megatofu | 11 |
| #324 | melted Jell-o shot | 4 |
| #217 | mixed wildflower greens | 3 |
| #1340 | motivational poster | 1 |
| #600 | mysterious silver lapel pin | 1 |
| #585 | obsidian dagger | 31 |
| #1140 | orange glowstick | 1 |
| #153 | outrageous sombrero | 1 |
| #662 | palm frond | 2 |
| #189 | palm-frond capris | 1 |
| #213 | palm-frond whip | 1 |
| #103 | paperclip cape | 1 |
| #99 | paperclip pants | 1 |
| #91 | paperclip turban | 1 |
| #329 | plexiglass pikestaff | 1 |
| #289 | plexiglass pith helmet | 1 |
| #415 | pool cue | 13 |
| #828 | pork elf goodies sack | 6 |
| #1730 | really dense meat stack | 1 |
| #808 | rib of the Bonerdagon | 2 |
| #1022 | rusty chain necklace | 1 |
| #398 | serpentine sword | 1 |
| #856 | shiny ring | 27 |
| #620 | silver shrimp fork | 2 |
| #1272 | slow jam collection | 1 |
| 🥉 | snow belly | 1 |
| #10 | snow hat | 1 |
| 🥉 | snow pants | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #999 | spectre scepter | 31 |
| #1281 | stainless steel scarf | 2 |
| #943 | stainless steel shillelagh | 5 |
| #706 | stainless steel skullcap | 5 |
| #691 | stainless steel slacks | 6 |
| #1007 | stainless steel solitaire | 3 |
| #1709 | stainless steel suspenders | 1 |
| #2642 | stuffing | 1 |
| #970 | tattered paper crown | 1 |
| #459 | thistle wine | 2 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #174 | tin star | 1 |
| #699 | woven baling wire bracelets | 1 |
| #388 | wrench bracelet | 8 |