| #1149 | 1337 7r0uZ0RZ | 1 |
| #1224 | 33398 scroll | 1 |
| #923 | 7-Foot Dwarven mattock | 1 |
| #297 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 | 1 |
| #784 | ASCII shirt | 1 |
| #2096 | Angry Farmer candy | 1 |
| #4299 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 1 |
| #522 | Blue Diamond of Honesty | 1 |
| #1367 | Copper Alpha of Sincerity | 1 |
| #650 | Crimbo wreath | 1 |
| #6 | Crimbomination Contraption | 1 |
| #858 | Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots | 2 |
| #1436 | Green Clover of Justice | 1 |
| #1283 | Iron Beta of Industry | 2 |
| #375 | Mad Train wine | 263 |
| #130 | Meat maid | 1 |
| #115 | Mer-kin breastplate | 1 |
| #184 | Mer-kin hookspear | 1 |
| #181 | Mer-kin prayerbeads | 1 |
| #106 | Mer-kin roundshield | 1 |
| #131 | Mer-kin sneakmask | 1 |
| #191 | Mer-kin takebag | 1 |
| #982 | Nickel Gamma of Frugality | 3 |
| #865 | Orange Star of Sacrifice | 2 |
| #1594 | Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster | 2 |
| #235 | Pink Heart of Spirit | 4 |
| #770 | Red Rover BB gun | 1 |
| #1250 | Uncle Crimbo's Rations | 1 |
| #1612 | Yellow Moon of Compassion | 1 |
| #653 | Zinc Delta of Tranquility | 2 |
| #1008 | acid-squirting flower | 1 |
| #706 | all-purpose cleaner | 1 |
| #533 | ancient spice | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| #484 | anti-anti-antidote | 1 |
| #485 | armgun | 1 |
| #488 | around the world | 1 |
| #478 | asbestos sword | 1 |
| #642 | asshat | 1 |
| #1924 | awful poetry journal | 1 |
| #7431 | badass belt | 1 |
| #429 | balaclava | 1 |
| #629 | ballroom blintz | 1 |
| #539 | barbed-wire fence | 7 |
| #117 | barskin tent | 2 |
| #783 | batblade | 1 |
| #1174 | batgut | 1 |
| #1661 | battered Crimbo Crate | 1 |
| #167 | beanbag chair | 3 |
| #1500 | bit of clingfilm | 1 |
| #269 | blackberry combat boots | 1 |
| #6 | blackberry moccasins | 134 |
| #226 | blackberry slippers | 1 |
| #1387 | bottle of goofballs | 17 |
| #182 | bum cheek | 114 |
| #1999 | candy kneecapping stick | 1 |
| #1855 | candy knuckles | 1 |
| #804 | cement sandals | 1 |
| #30 | clingfilm cap | 1 |
| #40 | clingfilm slippers | 1 |
| #34 | clingfilm trousers | 1 |
| 🥉 | control crystal | 1 |
| #246 | cottage | 1 |
| #261 | crystallized memory | 1 |
| #628 | decorative fountain | 3 |
| #208 | dirty hobo gloves | 127 |
| #1606 | dollhive | 1 |
| #2077 | elven cellocello | 1 |
| #1910 | elven suicide capsule | 1 |
| #1472 | enchanted leopard-print barbell | 2 |
| #1881 | fancy chocolate car | 1 |
| #165 | floaty inverse geode | 1 |
| #3934 | gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #610 | gingerbread house | 1 |
| #2815 | gingerbread mutant bugbear | 1 |
| #198 | gremlin mutagen | 1 |
| #1879 | herringcello | 1 |
| #2795 | irradiated candy cane | 1 |
| #1861 | jawbruiser | 1 |
| #1828 | licorice garrote | 1 |
| #74 | meat golem | 1 |
| #109 | misfit teddy bear | 1 |
| #2437 | oozenog | 1 |
| #73 | packet of beer nuts | 11 |
| #1325 | pair of bolt cutters | 1 |
| #1811 | penguin focaccia bread | 1 |
| #637 | plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #1512 | pulsing flesh | 1 |
| #1151 | roll of toilet paper | 32 |
| #2409 | sandwich of the gods | 1 |
| 🥈 | speed limit shield | 1 |
| #600 | string of Crimbo lights | 1 |
| #2151 | stuffed Baron von Ratsworth | 10 |
| #3120 | stuffed Cheshire bitten | 14 |
| #3983 | stuffed MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech | 10 |
| #1624 | stuffed Meat | 20 |
| #3333 | stuffed astral badger | 13 |
| #3089 | stuffed baby gravy fairy | 15 |
| #4794 | stuffed cocoabo | 7 |
| #3816 | stuffed flaming gravy fairy | 11 |
| #3064 | stuffed frozen gravy fairy | 15 |
| #2567 | stuffed hand turkey | 19 |
| #1161 | stuffed key | 34 |
| #3771 | stuffed mind flayer | 11 |
| #1969 | stuffed monocle | 13 |
| #3599 | stuffed scary death orb | 12 |
| #2675 | stuffed sleazy gravy fairy | 18 |
| #2481 | stuffed snowy owl | 19 |
| #3057 | stuffed spooky gravy fairy | 15 |
| #3725 | stuffed stinky gravy fairy | 11 |
| #1799 | stuffed teddy butler | 16 |
| #1543 | stuffed tin of caviar | 22 |
| #1260 | stuffed treasure chest | 29 |
| #4007 | stuffed undead elbow macaroni | 10 |
| #1444 | throwing wrench | 1 |
| #649 | tiny plastic 11 Dealer | 1 |
| #620 | tiny plastic Crimbo Casino | 1 |
| #577 | tiny plastic Crimbomination | 1 |
| #632 | tiny plastic Don Crimbo | 1 |
| #1057 | tiny plastic Mob Penguin | 1 |
| #991 | tiny plastic chunk of depleted Grimacite | 1 |
| #1018 | tiny plastic fat stack of cash | 1 |
| #1035 | tiny plastic mutant elf | 1 |
| #585 | tiny plastic stocking mimic | 1 |
| #978 | tiny plastic strand of DNA | 1 |
| #2308 | unstable DNA | 1 |
| #552 | white picket fence | 4 |