| #113 | "Humorous" T-shirt | 1 |
| #1458 | Amulet of Yendor | 1 |
| #2228 | Ancient Saucehelm | 1 |
| #68 | BRICKO hat | 1 |
| #610 | Baron von Ratsworth's money clip | 1 |
| #3371 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 2 |
| #161 | Bash-Ōs boxtop | 7 |
| #1117 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) | 1 |
| #1013 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) | 1 |
| #1054 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) | 1 |
| #1020 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) | 1 |
| #1009 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) | 1 |
| #1553 | CRIMBCO mug | 3 |
| #2462 | Colander of Em-er'il | 1 |
| #1349 | Crimbo candied pecan | 1 |
| #650 | Crimbo wreath | 1 |
| #6 | Crimbomination Contraption | 1 |
| #4246 | Crown of the Goblin King | 1 |
| #1537 | Dickory Farms Gift Basket | 1 |
| #2663 | Disco 'Fro Pick | 1 |
| #1940 | Dolphin King's crown | 1 |
| #2384 | Elder Turtle Shell | 1 |
| #13 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy (shredded) | 1 |
| #887 | Knob Goblin visor | 1 |
| #1068 | Safari Jack's moustache | 1 |
| #2543 | Scalp of Gorgolok | 1 |
| #1032 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 1 |
| #96 | The Six-Pack of Pain | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #1570 | Thwaitgold bee statuette | 1 |
| #1376 | Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette | 2 |
| #2403 | Valentine | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| #846 | annoying pitchfork | 2 |
| #2228 | badass belt | 23 |
| #1885 | bag of airline peanuts | 1 |
| #294 | balaclava | 2 |
| #642 | bed of coals | 1 |
| #262 | booze-soaked cherry | 1 |
| #58 | bottle of Goldschnöckered | 1 |
| #5030 | bottle of goofballs | 1 |
| #54 | boxing-glove-in-a-box | 1 |
| #2050 | brick | 4 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #1111 | bugbear bungguard | 1 |
| #964 | bunny liver | 1 |
| #470 | burst hellseal brain | 8 |
| #957 | can of spinach | 1 |
| #422 | cheap toaster | 5 |
| #34 | clingfilm trousers | 1 |
| #1796 | clown hammer | 1 |
| 🥉 | control crystal | 1 |
| #513 | cursed bottle of rum | 1 |
| #431 | cursed voodoo skull | 1 |
| #1480 | defective skull | 1 |
| #505 | depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick | 1 |
| #515 | depleted uranium seal figurine | 1 |
| #1149 | designer handbag | 1 |
| #79 | double-ice box | 1 |
| #170 | double-ice cap | 1 |
| #931 | draggin' ball hat | 1 |
| #5139 | easter egg balloon | 1 |
| #362 | empty agua de vida bottle | 574 |
| #124 | enchantlers | 1 |
| #1776 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #1989 | fake fake vomit | 1 |
| #1792 | fake hand | 1 |
| #1176 | festive sausage | 1 |
| #439 | filth-encrusted futon | 2 |
| #305 | flashing novelty button | 4 |
| #789 | foolscap fool's cap | 1 |
| #208 | fuzzy dice | 16 |
| #17 | giant diamond ring | 8 |
| #745 | green clay bead | 5 |
| #3380 | heart necklace | 1 |
| #627 | holiday cheese log | 2 |
| #1764 | ice-cold Sir Schlitz | 1 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #1832 | jazz soap | 1 |
| #1015 | lead necklace | 3 |
| #3387 | obsidian dagger | 1 |
| #1549 | old sweatpants | 10 |
| 🥉 | packet of pumpkin seeds | 1 |
| #948 | personalized coffee mug | 2 |
| #2030 | phish stick | 1 |
| #879 | pink clay bead | 3 |
| #1206 | pink glowstick | 1 |
| #637 | plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #212 | plexiglass pinky ring | 1 |
| #289 | plexiglass pith helmet | 1 |
| #339 | prismatic wad | 3 |
| #100 | raspberry beret | 1 |
| #1012 | red class ring | 1 |
| #1298 | rib of the Bonerdagon | 1 |
| #305 | right half of a heart necklace | 2 |
| #1959 | rubber emo roe | 1 |
| #104 | sequined fez | 1 |
| #251 | shard of double-ice | 4 |
| #2958 | shiny ring | 1 |
| #548 | small leather glove | 1 |
| #475 | snorkel | 1 |
| #2491 | spade necklace | 2 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #600 | string of Crimbo lights | 1 |
| #1866 | string of blue beads | 3 |
| #1745 | string of green beads | 4 |
| #1715 | string of red beads | 4 |
| #7809 | stuffed Cheshire bitten | 2 |
| #408 | stuffed Hodgman | 1 |
| #7815 | stuffed MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech | 2 |
| #8851 | stuffed angry cow | 1 |
| #6383 | stuffed astral badger | 4 |
| #7017 | stuffed baby gravy fairy | 3 |
| #1867 | stuffed crazy bastard sword | 1 |
| #7012 | stuffed flaming gravy fairy | 3 |
| #5330 | stuffed frozen gravy fairy | 6 |
| #7012 | stuffed hand turkey | 3 |
| #1678 | stuffed martini | 2 |
| #8903 | stuffed mind flayer | 1 |
| #6364 | stuffed scary death orb | 4 |
| #7829 | stuffed sleazy gravy fairy | 2 |
| #7669 | stuffed snowy owl | 2 |
| #5315 | stuffed spooky gravy fairy | 6 |
| #8882 | stuffed undead elbow macaroni | 1 |
| #776 | stuffed zmobie | 1 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #100 | tiny black hole | 1 |
| #281 | tiny plastic Fudge Wizard | 1 |
| #301 | tiny plastic abominable fudgeman | 1 |
| #151 | tiny plastic colollilossus | 2 |
| #171 | tiny plastic trollipop | 2 |
| #748 | torn hellseal sinew | 1 |
| #270 | traffic jam | 1 |
| #392 | tulip | 1 |
| #1688 | useless powder | 4 |
| #1508 | valuable trinket | 18 |
| #1042 | viking helmet | 1 |
| 🥇 | wand of fudge control | 1 |
| #1937 | whoopie cushion | 1 |
| #552 | worn tophat | 1 |
| #2120 | yellow snowcone | 1 |