| #650 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes | 1 |
| #163 | Alice's Army Alchemist | 4 |
| #172 | Alice's Army Bowman | 2 |
| #223 | Alice's Army Cleric | 1 |
| #172 | Alice's Army Coward | 2 |
| #155 | Alice's Army Dervish | 1 |
| #62 | Alice's Army Foil Spearsman | 1 |
| #135 | Alice's Army Guard | 6 |
| #179 | Alice's Army Halberder | 3 |
| #211 | Alice's Army Hammerman | 1 |
| #143 | Alice's Army Horseman | 3 |
| #116 | Alice's Army Lanceman | 5 |
| #151 | Alice's Army Mad Bomber | 5 |
| #160 | Alice's Army Martyr | 1 |
| #203 | Alice's Army Ninja | 2 |
| #154 | Alice's Army Nurse | 5 |
| #158 | Alice's Army Page | 4 |
| #147 | Alice's Army Shieldmaiden | 5 |
| #109 | Alice's Army Sniper | 2 |
| #160 | Alice's Army Spearsman | 4 |
| #143 | Alice's Army Swordsman | 5 |
| #160 | Alice's Army Wallman | 4 |
| #441 | BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt | 2 |
| #732 | BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt | 1 |
| #203 | BGE merchandise order form | 21 |
| #240 | BGE pocket calendar | 3 |
| #1310 | BGE shotglass | 5 |
| #675 | BGE temporary tattoo | 1 |
| #224 | BGE tiny plastic toy | 5 |
| #1117 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) | 1 |
| #529 | CRIMBCO lanyard | 1 |
| #1033 | CRIMBCO mug | 8 |
| #315 | CRIMBCO scrip | 1,020 |
| #2127 | CRIMBCOIDS mints | 2 |
| #535 | CRIMBCOLOAF | 6 |
| #182 | Chester's bag of candy | 1 |
| #175 | Chester's cutoffs | 1 |
| #185 | Chester's moustache | 1 |
| #82 | Chester's muscle shirt | 1 |
| #109 | Crimbo P. R. E. S. S. I. E. | 1 |
| #1367 | Crimbo peppermint bark | 1 |
| #1296 | Dickory Farms Gift Basket | 2 |
| #85 | Golden Mr. Accessory | 1 |
| 🥇 | Great S-Cape | 1 |
| 🥇 | Gummi-DNA | 9,584 |
| #1195 | Jack-in-the-box | 1 |
| #6 | Junior Adventurer's merit badge | 1 |
| 🥇 | Superhero Reboots | 1 |
| #848 | Time Juice | 7 |
| #114 | Tome of Clip Art | 1 |
| #200 | Unionize The Elves sign | 1 |
| #109 | adhesive tape dolly | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| #121 | battered Crimbo Crate | 126 |
| #81 | big slimy cyst | 3 |
| #296 | bottle of Blank-Out | 40 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #736 | can of CRIMBCOLA | 5 |
| #110 | candy cornucopia | 1 |
| #662 | circular CRIMBCOOKIE | 3 |
| #52 | extra-potent gremlin mutagen | 11 |
| #124 | fancy ball mask | 1 |
| #5 | gasmask | 2 |
| #91 | globe of Deep Sauce | 2 |
| 🥉 | gremlin mutagen | 352 |
| #626 | holiday cheese log | 2 |
| #71 | infant sandworm | 1 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #59 | medium slimy cyst | 3 |
| 🥇 | old-fashioned Crimbo Pressie | 1 |
| #93 | portable photocopier | 64 |
| #4 | radium-flavored potato chips | 5,618 |
| #227 | raffle prize box | 1 |
| 🥉 | refrigerated biohazard container | 25 |
| 🥇 | space trooper helmet | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #139 | tiny plastic strand of DNA | 6 |
| #265 | unstable DNA | 199 |
| #51 | vinyl shield | 1 |
| 🥇 | webbed comic mask | 1 |