| #22 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes (used) | 1 |
| #1132 | Asleep in the Cemetery | 1 |
| #11 | Ass-Stompers of Violence | 2 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #33 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 1 |
| #35 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) | 1 |
| #6 | Celsius 233 (singed) | 1 |
| #132 | Crimbeau de toilette | 1 |
| #159 | Crimbo candle | 1 |
| #751 | Crimbo pie | 1 |
| #179 | Crimboysters Rockefeller | 1 |
| #347 | D roll | 1 |
| #20 | Jodhpurs of Violence | 1 |
| #849 | Maxing, Relaxing | 1 |
| 🥇 | Pocket Meteor Guide (well-thumbed) | 1 |
| #974 | Sensual Massage for Creeps | 1 |
| #938 | Tales from the Fireside | 1 |
| #21 | The Art of Slapfighting (used) | 1 |
| #967 | The Joy of Wassailing | 1 |
| #216 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 16 |
| #494 | Thwaitgold amoeba statuette | 1 |
| #415 | Thwaitgold bug statuette | 2 |
| #691 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 3 |
| #415 | Thwaitgold cockroach statuette | 1 |
| #1398 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 2 |
| #183 | Thwaitgold masked hunter statuette | 2 |
| #307 | Thwaitgold metabug statuette | 1 |
| #241 | Thwaitgold moth statuette | 2 |
| #259 | Thwaitgold nit statuette | 1 |
| #1021 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 2 |
| #591 | Thwaitgold spider statuette | 4 |
| #1242 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 1 |
| #126 | Thwaitgold time fly statuette | 1 |
| #931 | Travels with Jerry | 1 |
| #22 | Uncle Romulus (used) | 1 |
| #24 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used) | 1 |
| #212 | bag of GORF | 1 |
| #66 | bag of grain | 1 |
| #74 | beaver punch (cherry) | 1 |
| #73 | beaver punch (papaya) | 1 |
| #88 | beaver punch (peach) | 1 |
| #93 | blood-drive sticker | 1 |
| #164 | bottle of Crimbognac | 1 |
| #59 | bowl of Tastee-Wheet™ | 2 |
| #41 | box of Gratitude chocolates | 2 |
| #119 | cookie cookie | 5 |
| #82 | emergency margarita | 1 |
| #137 | fancy beef jerky | 1 |
| #294 | grilled mooseflank | 1 |
| #22 | half double fruitcake | 3 |
| #173 | hot watered rum | 1 |
| #251 | hushed puppy | 2 |
| #569 | java cookie | 1 |
| #82 | mime army camouflage kit | 2 |
| #150 | mime army rations | 2 |
| #88 | mime army superserum | 2 |
| #205 | mime army wine | 1 |
| #72 | mime pocket probe | 1 |
| #180 | mooseflank | 12 |
| #35 | muffled muffuletta | 7 |
| #47 | neg grog | 1 |
| #191 | nega-mushroom | 7 |
| #860 | nut-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |
| #544 | petit fortran | 1 |
| #75 | pocket maze | 1 |
| #88 | sausage without a cause | 1 |
| #93 | seared dino steak | 1 |
| #67 | shady shades | 1 |
| #82 | silver face paint | 1 |
| #78 | squeaky toy rose | 1 |
| #110 | stale Cheer-E-Os | 9 |
| #234 | still-beating spleen | 1 |
| #239 | traditional Crimbo cookie | 9 |
| #83 | vintage smart drink | 1 |
| #96 | weird gazelle steak | 1 |
| #195 | yule gruel | 1 |
| #102 | yule pup | 1 |