| #414 | Aluminum Epsilon of Humility | 1 |
| #124 | Ankh of Badahnkadh | 3 |
| #788 | Argarggagarg's fang | 2 |
| #27 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #8 | Booke of Vampyric Knowledge | 15 |
| #38 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| #17 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #759 | Heimandatz's heart | 2 |
| #200 | Hollandaise helmet | 30 |
| #880 | Jocko Homo's head | 2 |
| #229 | Lead Zeta of Chastity | 1 |
| #4 | LyleCo Contractor's Manual | 1 |
| #48 | Manual of Lock Picking | 1 |
| #88 | Mer-kin darkbook | 1 |
| #172 | My First Art of War | 1 |
| #19 | Purple Beast energy drink | 750 |
| #232 | Purple Horseshoe of Honor | 1 |
| #1074 | Safari Jack's moustache | 1 |
| #31 | Space Tourist Phaser | 37 |
| #702 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 2 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #48 | The Nose Knows, A Guide to Smells | 1 |
| #10 | The Nose Knows, A Guide to Smells (read) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Giving (used) | 1 |
| #1005 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 3 |
| #411 | Thwaitgold bombardier beetle statuette | 1 |
| #352 | Thwaitgold buzzy beetle statuette | 1 |
| #989 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 1 |
| #175 | Thwaitgold keyhole spider statuette | 2 |
| #1813 | Thwaitgold maggot statuette | 1 |
| #32 | Thwaitgold mosquito statuette | 24 |
| #215 | Thwaitgold nymph statuette | 5 |
| #122 | Thwaitgold quantum bug statuette | 12 |
| #1042 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 2 |
| #665 | Thwaitgold scorpion statuette | 1 |
| #379 | Thwaitgold slug statuette | 11 |
| #2345 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 1 |
| #1267 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 1 |
| #1119 | Yakisoba's hat | 1 |
| #11 | actual blood sausage | 2 |
| #676 | adorable seal larva | 4 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| #5939 | badass belt | 3 |
| #14 | blood roll-up | 1 |
| #8 | blood-soaked sponge cake | 24 |
| #7 | blue money bag | 20 |
| #6716 | box of sunshine | 2 |
| #588 | corrupted data | 8 |
| #32 | crated wardrobe-o-matic | 1 |
| #134 | demon-horned hat | 1 |
| #3285 | diamond necklace | 1 |
| #7 | dusty bottle of blood | 6 |
| #1086 | eyepatch | 1 |
| #408 | friendly cheez blob | 6 |
| #309 | huge Crimbo cookie | 2 |
| #320 | lemon | 148 |
| #596 | macaroni duck | 4 |
| #444 | mariachi hat | 1 |
| #8 | mulled blood | 2 |
| #2223 | old sweatpants | 1 |
| #1884 | phish stick | 2 |
| #1729 | really dense meat stack | 1 |
| #12 | red money bag | 81 |
| #16 | ring of the Skeleton Lord | 1 |
| #1170 | [2108]rock | 2 |
| #1543 | solid gold bowling ball | 6 |
| #530 | squirming egg sac | 14 |
| #452 | stray chihuahua | 6 |
| #8936 | stuffed Cheshire bitten | 1 |
| #8860 | stuffed angry cow | 1 |
| #8947 | stuffed baby gravy fairy | 1 |
| #161 | stuffed carpenter | 1 |
| #6178 | stuffed cocoabo | 4 |
| #8922 | stuffed flaming gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8969 | stuffed frozen gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8910 | stuffed mind flayer | 1 |
| #8939 | stuffed scary death orb | 1 |
| #8960 | stuffed sleazy gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8881 | stuffed spooky gravy fairy | 1 |
| #7822 | stuffed undead elbow macaroni | 2 |
| #3940 | tiny plastic Black Knight | 1 |
| #6227 | tiny plastic Cheshire bat | 2 |
| #3911 | tiny plastic Hellion | 1 |
| #4543 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 1 |
| #4843 | tiny plastic angry goat | 3 |
| #8251 | tiny plastic baby gravy fairy | 1 |
| #4901 | tiny plastic barrrnacle | 3 |
| #8175 | tiny plastic blood-faced volleyball | 1 |
| #6131 | tiny plastic cocoabo | 2 |
| #3300 | tiny plastic coffee pixie | 5 |
| #3937 | tiny plastic demoninja | 1 |
| #4498 | tiny plastic disco bandit | 1 |
| #6181 | tiny plastic fuzzy dice | 2 |
| #8187 | tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick | 1 |
| #6156 | tiny plastic ghuol whelp | 2 |
| #6100 | tiny plastic grue | 2 |
| #6149 | tiny plastic howling balloon monkey | 2 |
| #2462 | tiny plastic killer bee | 7 |
| #4877 | tiny plastic leprechaun | 3 |
| #8103 | tiny plastic levitating potato | 1 |
| #6161 | tiny plastic mosquito | 2 |
| #3996 | tiny plastic ninja snowman | 1 |
| #4346 | tiny plastic pastamancer | 1 |
| #4798 | tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime | 3 |
| #4467 | tiny plastic sauceror | 1 |
| #4450 | tiny plastic seal clubber | 1 |
| #3838 | tiny plastic spiny skelelton | 1 |
| #8225 | tiny plastic spooky pirate skeleton | 1 |
| #8160 | tiny plastic stab bat | 1 |
| #4893 | tiny plastic star starfish | 3 |
| #4481 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 1 |
| #3873 | tiny plastic warwelf | 1 |
| #1082 | toast | 541 |
| #767 | tortoise's blessing | 1 |
| #445 | untamable turtle | 5 |
| #451 | unusual disco ball | 6 |
| #13 | vampagne | 28 |
| #9 | white money bag | 34 |
| #78 | zombie dinosaur egg | 1 |