| #410 | Aluminum Epsilon of Humility | 1 |
| #123 | Ankh of Badahnkadh | 3 |
| #786 | Argarggagarg's fang | 2 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #8 | Booke of Vampyric Knowledge | 15 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #35 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| #16 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #753 | Heimandatz's heart | 2 |
| #197 | Hollandaise helmet | 30 |
| #875 | Jocko Homo's head | 2 |
| #226 | Lead Zeta of Chastity | 1 |
| 🥉 | LyleCo Contractor's Manual | 1 |
| #46 | Manual of Lock Picking | 1 |
| #88 | Mer-kin darkbook | 1 |
| #167 | My First Art of War | 1 |
| #17 | Purple Beast energy drink | 750 |
| #233 | Purple Horseshoe of Honor | 1 |
| #1068 | Safari Jack's moustache | 1 |
| #31 | Space Tourist Phaser | 37 |
| #699 | The Mariachi's guitar case | 2 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #49 | The Nose Knows, A Guide to Smells | 1 |
| #9 | The Nose Knows, A Guide to Smells (read) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Giving (used) | 1 |
| #1000 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 3 |
| #396 | Thwaitgold bombardier beetle statuette | 1 |
| #336 | Thwaitgold buzzy beetle statuette | 1 |
| #970 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 1 |
| #169 | Thwaitgold keyhole spider statuette | 2 |
| #1783 | Thwaitgold maggot statuette | 1 |
| #32 | Thwaitgold mosquito statuette | 24 |
| #204 | Thwaitgold nymph statuette | 5 |
| #111 | Thwaitgold quantum bug statuette | 12 |
| #1021 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 2 |
| #653 | Thwaitgold scorpion statuette | 1 |
| #356 | Thwaitgold slug statuette | 11 |
| #2327 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 1 |
| #1242 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 1 |
| #1114 | Yakisoba's hat | 1 |
| #11 | actual blood sausage | 2 |
| #668 | adorable seal larva | 4 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| #5942 | badass belt | 3 |
| #14 | blood roll-up | 1 |
| #8 | blood-soaked sponge cake | 24 |
| #7 | blue money bag | 20 |
| #6710 | box of sunshine | 2 |
| #587 | corrupted data | 8 |
| #31 | crated wardrobe-o-matic | 1 |
| #134 | demon-horned hat | 1 |
| #3286 | diamond necklace | 1 |
| #7 | dusty bottle of blood | 6 |
| #1085 | eyepatch | 1 |
| #402 | friendly cheez blob | 6 |
| #308 | huge Crimbo cookie | 2 |
| #318 | lemon | 148 |
| #587 | macaroni duck | 4 |
| #437 | mariachi hat | 1 |
| #8 | mulled blood | 2 |
| #2216 | old sweatpants | 1 |
| #1883 | phish stick | 2 |
| #1723 | really dense meat stack | 1 |
| #12 | red money bag | 81 |
| #17 | ring of the Skeleton Lord | 1 |
| #1170 | [2108]rock | 2 |
| #1541 | solid gold bowling ball | 6 |
| #530 | squirming egg sac | 14 |
| #443 | stray chihuahua | 6 |
| #8926 | stuffed Cheshire bitten | 1 |
| #8850 | stuffed angry cow | 1 |
| #8938 | stuffed baby gravy fairy | 1 |
| #161 | stuffed carpenter | 1 |
| #6161 | stuffed cocoabo | 4 |
| #8912 | stuffed flaming gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8958 | stuffed frozen gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8902 | stuffed mind flayer | 1 |
| #8935 | stuffed scary death orb | 1 |
| #8951 | stuffed sleazy gravy fairy | 1 |
| #8871 | stuffed spooky gravy fairy | 1 |
| #7813 | stuffed undead elbow macaroni | 2 |
| #3934 | tiny plastic Black Knight | 1 |
| #6213 | tiny plastic Cheshire bat | 2 |
| #3904 | tiny plastic Hellion | 1 |
| #4533 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 1 |
| #4831 | tiny plastic angry goat | 3 |
| #8240 | tiny plastic baby gravy fairy | 1 |
| #4888 | tiny plastic barrrnacle | 3 |
| #8160 | tiny plastic blood-faced volleyball | 1 |
| #6120 | tiny plastic cocoabo | 2 |
| #3290 | tiny plastic coffee pixie | 5 |
| #3932 | tiny plastic demoninja | 1 |
| #4490 | tiny plastic disco bandit | 1 |
| #6172 | tiny plastic fuzzy dice | 2 |
| #8177 | tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick | 1 |
| #6146 | tiny plastic ghuol whelp | 2 |
| #6085 | tiny plastic grue | 2 |
| #6137 | tiny plastic howling balloon monkey | 2 |
| #2457 | tiny plastic killer bee | 7 |
| #4865 | tiny plastic leprechaun | 3 |
| #8088 | tiny plastic levitating potato | 1 |
| #6151 | tiny plastic mosquito | 2 |
| #3992 | tiny plastic ninja snowman | 1 |
| #4340 | tiny plastic pastamancer | 1 |
| #4790 | tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime | 3 |
| #4459 | tiny plastic sauceror | 1 |
| #4445 | tiny plastic seal clubber | 1 |
| #3829 | tiny plastic spiny skelelton | 1 |
| #8214 | tiny plastic spooky pirate skeleton | 1 |
| #8148 | tiny plastic stab bat | 1 |
| #4882 | tiny plastic star starfish | 3 |
| #4474 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 1 |
| #3865 | tiny plastic warwelf | 1 |
| #1080 | toast | 541 |
| #768 | tortoise's blessing | 1 |
| #440 | untamable turtle | 5 |
| #446 | unusual disco ball | 6 |
| #13 | vampagne | 28 |
| #9 | white money bag | 34 |
| #74 | zombie dinosaur egg | 1 |