| #113 | "Humorous" T-shirt | 1 |
| #22 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes (used) | 1 |
| #12 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #9 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #10 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #967 | A. W. O. L. commendation | 1 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #269 | Bartles and BRAAAINS wine cooler | 10 |
| #300 | Bone's Farm "wine" | 6 |
| 🥈 | C.B.F.G. | 1 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #33 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 1 |
| #35 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) | 1 |
| #17 | Cloaca-Cola knapsack | 1,207 |
| #907 | Crimbo Candy Cookbook | 4 |
| #269 | Ecto-Cooler | 4 |
| #16 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #13 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy (shredded) | 1 |
| #1197 | Jack-in-the-box | 1 |
| #143 | MagiMechTech NanoMechaMech | 66 |
| #396 | Miniborg beeper | 1 |
| #362 | Miniborg hiveminder | 1 |
| #394 | Miniborg laser | 1 |
| #443 | Miniborg stomper | 1 |
| #405 | Miniborg strangler | 1 |
| #999 | Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster | 6 |
| #367 | Silver Bullet beer | 5 |
| #68 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) | 1 |
| #112 | The Cooler Out of Space | 26 |
| #48 | The Joy of Wassailing (used) | 1 |
| #7 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 2 |
| #603 | Thwaitgold bee statuette | 4 |
| #334 | Thwaitgold butterfly statuette | 4 |
| #671 | Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette | 5 |
| #1379 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 6 |
| #22 | Uncle Romulus (used) | 1 |
| #24 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used) | 1 |
| #214 | ammonite fossil | 24 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #156 | belemnite fossil | 34 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg helmet | 1 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg leg armor | 1 |
| #2866 | blob-shaped Crimbo cookie | 5 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #3271 | club necklace | 1 |
| #477 | cyborg doll | 3 |
| #905 | enchanted leopard-print barbell | 7 |
| #2680 | evil teddy bear | 1 |
| #2423 | fancy dress ball | 1 |
| #1610 | flashing novelty button | 1 |
| #1335 | gingerbread mutant bugbear | 4 |
| #1801 | golden ring | 39 |
| #1007 | green glowstick | 1 |
| #1328 | handful of confetti | 29 |
| #3379 | heart necklace | 1 |
| 🥇 | heart of dark chocolate | 1 |
| #1922 | immense cyborg hand | 2 |
| #977 | irradiated candy cane | 5 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #2114 | killing feather | 15 |
| #737 | laser-broiled pear | 12 |
| #164 | left half of a heart necklace | 3 |
| #1226 | monomolecular yo-yo | 11 |
| #1677 | nanite-infested candy cane | 5 |
| #1023 | nanite-infested fruitcake | 5 |
| #2028 | nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear | 3 |
| #2043 | oozenog | 2 |
| #153 | outrageous sombrero | 1 |
| #330 | phish stick | 3 |
| #35 | record of infuriating silence | 1 |
| #25 | record of menacing silence | 1 |
| #28 | record of tranquil silence | 1 |
| #146 | ridiculous cocktail | 11 |
| #136 | ridiculous sandwich | 11 |
| #917 | robotronic egg | 30 |
| #1882 | rogue swarmer | 30 |
| #862 | sandwich of the gods | 8 |
| #2174 | sawblade fragment | 19 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #1729 | square CRIMBCOOKIE | 1 |
| #1190 | theoretical string | 4 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #174 | tin star | 1 |
| #932 | tiny die-cast Bashful the Reindeer | 1 |
| #949 | tiny die-cast CrimboTown Toy Factory | 1 |
| #933 | tiny die-cast Doc the Reindeer | 1 |
| #610 | tiny die-cast Don Crimbo | 1 |
| #926 | tiny die-cast Dopey the Reindeer | 1 |
| #598 | tiny die-cast Father Crimbo | 1 |
| #629 | tiny die-cast Father Crimborg | 1 |
| #928 | tiny die-cast Grumpy the Reindeer | 1 |
| #926 | tiny die-cast Happy the Reindeer | 1 |
| #613 | tiny die-cast Rudolphus of Crimborg | 1 |
| #928 | tiny die-cast Sleepy the Reindeer | 1 |
| #940 | tiny die-cast Sneezy the Reindeer | 1 |
| #563 | tiny die-cast Swiss hen | 1 |
| #587 | tiny die-cast Uncle Hobo | 1 |
| #937 | tiny die-cast Unionize the Elves Sign | 1 |
| #932 | tiny die-cast Zeppo the Reindeer | 1 |
| #562 | tiny die-cast arc-welding Elfborg | 1 |
| #589 | tiny die-cast blade a-spinning | 1 |
| #585 | tiny die-cast death ray in a pear tree | 1 |
| #948 | tiny die-cast factory worker elf | 1 |
| #924 | tiny die-cast gift-wrapping elf | 1 |
| #551 | tiny die-cast golden ring | 1 |
| #565 | tiny die-cast goose a-laying | 1 |
| #548 | tiny die-cast killing bird | 1 |
| #944 | tiny die-cast middle-management elf | 1 |
| #945 | tiny die-cast pencil-pusher elf | 1 |
| #578 | tiny die-cast ribbon-cutting Elfborg | 1 |
| #937 | tiny die-cast stocking-stuffer elf | 1 |
| #550 | tiny die-cast swarm a-swarming | 1 |
| #564 | tiny die-cast turtle mech | 1 |
| #2400 | toy crazy train | 1 |
| #2128 | toy mercenary | 1 |
| #2475 | toy ray gun | 1 |
| #1439 | toy space helmet | 3 |
| #2484 | tree-eating kite | 3 |
| #602 | trilobite fossil | 5 |
| #2302 | unstable laser battery | 19 |
| #2526 | vampire duck-on-a-string | 1 |
| #1779 | vibrating cyborg knife | 4 |
| #104 | wind-up meatcar | 105 |
| #1584 | yo | 3 |