| #80 | 1952 Mickey Mantle card | 70 |
| #72 | A Guide to Burning Leaves | 1 |
| #94 | Amulet of Yendor | 211 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #33 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 1 |
| #2126 | CRIMBCOIDS mints | 2 |
| #2423 | CRIMBCOLOAF | 1 |
| #6 | Celsius 233 (singed) | 1 |
| 🥉 | Cocktails of the Age of Sail (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | Comprehensive Cartographic Compendium (well-read) | 1 |
| #126 | Crimboysters Rockefeller | 2 |
| #2636 | Crimbuck | 9 |
| #79 | Dark Jill-of-All-Trades | 1 |
| 🥈 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Culinary Arts (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Extortion (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Wilderness Sleeping (used) | 1 |
| #89 | Gathered Meat-Clip | 1 |
| #34 | January's Garbage Tote (unopened) | 1 |
| #18 | Knob Goblin visor | 16,545 |
| #46 | Middle of the Road™ brand whiskey | 80 |
| #24 | Neverending Party favor | 54 |
| #11 | Neverending Party guest pass | 11 |
| #5 | New Age hurting crystal | 1,213 |
| 🥇 | PARTY HARD T-shirt | 1 |
| #62 | PB&J with the crusts cut off | 5 |
| #23 | Party-in-a-Can™ | 6 |
| 🥈 | Pocket Guide to Mild Evil (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | Pocket Meteor Guide (well-thumbed) | 1 |
| #43 | Purple Beast energy drink | 66 |
| #7 | Spelunker of Fortune (used) | 1 |
| #57 | TRIO cup of beer | 2 |
| 🥉 | The Encyclopedia of Fruit (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #57 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| 🥇 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Giving (used) | 1 |
| #1202 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 2 |
| #787 | Thwaitgold caterpillar statuette | 2 |
| #1401 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 1 |
| 🥉 | Thwaitgold fairyfly statue | 184 |
| #87 | Thwaitgold harvestman statuette | 1 |
| #509 | Thwaitgold mosquito statuette | 2 |
| #326 | Thwaitgold moth statuette | 1 |
| #432 | Thwaitgold nymph statuette | 1 |
| #52 | Thwaitgold protozoa statuette | 26 |
| #951 | Thwaitgold spider statuette | 1 |
| #92 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 143 |
| #362 | Tuesday's ruby | 5 |
| #55 | Wal-Mart gift certificate | 58 |
| #14 | alien source code printout (used) | 1 |
| #229 | ancient vinyl coin purse | 22 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| #57 | baby chest mimic | 2 |
| #59 | bag of airline peanuts | 332 |
| #11 | bag of gross foreign snacks | 19,415 |
| #137 | bag of park garbage | 1 |
| #29 | bagged Cargo Cultist Shorts | 1 |
| #227 | black pension check | 26 |
| #3304 | blob-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |
| #108 | blue money bag | 2 |
| #57 | book of facts | 2 |
| 🥇 | book of facts (dog-eared) | 1 |
| #117 | bottle of Crimbognac | 2 |
| #588 | box of sunshine | 546 |
| #27 | boxed Apriling band helmet | 3 |
| #37 | boxed Mayam Calendar | 3 |
| #79 | boxed august scepter | 1 |
| #68 | briefcase | 299 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #2436 | candy cane | 8 |
| #13 | cheap sunglasses | 3,063 |
| #1749 | circular CRIMBCOOKIE | 1 |
| #98 | clown hammer | 238 |
| #19 | cosmetic football | 186 |
| #100 | creepy voice box | 1 |
| #157 | decomposed boot | 2 |
| #103 | defective skull | 213 |
| #36 | denim jacket | 22 |
| #814 | dense meat stack | 10 |
| #241 | dollar-sign bag | 2 |
| #186 | donated booze | 50 |
| #139 | donated candy | 100 |
| #123 | donated food | 150 |
| #34 | dorky glasses | 32 |
| #502 | effluvious emerald | 1 |
| #37 | electronics kit | 83 |
| #66 | encoder ring | 245 |
| #15 | everfull glass | 4 |
| #12 | expensive camera | 24,921 |
| #1337 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 8 |
| #140 | fake fake vomit | 198 |
| #1375 | fat stacks of cash | 1 |
| #139 | fat wallet | 4 |
| #8 | filthy child leash | 4,777 |
| #13 | gas can | 585 |
| #18 | gold skull ring | 3 |
| #166 | gold wedding ring | 57 |
| #103 | green pill | 1 |
| #114 | half of a gold tooth | 16 |
| #659 | handful of confetti | 62 |
| #21 | handful of tips | 169 |
| #1203 | heart of the volcano | 3 |
| #29 | hot watered rum | 1,000 |
| #286 | huge gold coin | 1 |
| #27 | in-the-box spring shoes | 3 |
| #17 | jam band bootleg | 365 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #102 | jazz soap | 219 |
| #95 | joybuzzer | 227 |
| #10 | lump of bauxite | 23 |
| #146 | magical ice cube with a fly in it | 176 |
| #104 | magical pony: Dusk Shiny | 40 |
| #44 | magical pony: Pearjack | 87 |
| #32 | magical pony: Rosey Cake | 225 |
| #77 | magical pony: Shutterfly | 56 |
| #65 | magical pony: Spectrum Dash | 74 |
| #95 | magical pony: Uniquity | 40 |
| #19 | meat from yesterday | 1,229 |
| #38 | meat stack | 34,608 |
| #18 | mini kiwi egg | 3 |
| #75 | mood ring | 190 |
| #294 | nanite-infested candy cane | 55 |
| #3426 | nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #32 | neverending wallet chain | 26 |
| #36 | noticeable pumps | 25 |
| #66 | old coin purse | 470 |
| #85 | old leather wallet | 239 |
| #319 | orange candygram | 1 |
| #27 | packaged Everfull Dart Holster | 3 |
| #26 | paint palette | 1 |
| #37 | party balloon | 9 |
| #36 | party beer bomb | 10 |
| #24 | party platter for one | 7 |
| #39 | pentagram bandana | 22 |
| #78 | pet rock "Groucho" disguise | 255 |
| #116 | pet rock "Snooty" disguise | 202 |
| #36 | ponytail clip | 25 |
| #586 | radio button candy | 1 |
| #30 | ratty knitted cap | 33 |
| #1723 | really dense meat stack | 1 |
| #100 | red money bag | 10 |
| #4 | residual chitin paste | 99 |
| #47 | roll of meat | 8 |
| #102 | rubber emo roe | 232 |
| #15 | runproof mascara | 545 |
| #200 | shiny stones | 35 |
| #34 | shoe ad T-shirt | 48 |
| #65 | shrink-wrapped 2002 Mr. Store Catalog | 1 |
| #67 | shrink-wrapped Cincho de Mayo | 1 |
| #137 | silent B | 1 |
| #240 | silent O | 1 |
| #185 | silent X | 1 |
| #90 | silver cow skull | 1 |
| #43 | sleeping patriotic eagle | 2 |
| #115 | smut orc keepsake box | 5 |
| #73 | solid gold bowling ball | 200 |
| #79 | solid gold jewel | 12 |
| #73 | spaghetti breakfast | 23 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| 🥈 | spinal-fluid-covered emotion chip | 1 |
| #2760 | stuffed Meat | 3 |
| #37 | surprisingly capacious handbag | 22 |
| #26 | sweet party mix | 13 |
| #4 | the Crymbich Manuscript (used) | 1 |
| #64 | traditional Crimbo cookie | 12 |
| #16 | unremarkable duffel bag | 526 |
| #287 | valuable trinket | 315 |
| #15 | van key | 447 |
| #35 | very small red dress | 69 |
| #54 | void stone | 42 |
| #205 | warehouse key | 2 |
| #150 | waterlogged crate | 1 |
| #197 | white candygram | 2 |
| #94 | white money bag | 4 |
| #105 | whoopie cushion | 220 |
| #2053 | wind-up chattering teeth | 1 |
| #50 | wrapped candy cane sword cane | 2 |
| #104 | x-ray specs | 196 |
| #131 | yellow candygram | 9 |
| #2120 | yellow snowcone | 1 |
| #27 | yule gruel | 1,000 |