| #73 | 'WILL WORK FOR BOOZE' sign | 19 |
| #1435 | 1-ball | 1 |
| #840 | 1337 7r0uZ0RZ | 3 |
| #1016 | 30669 scroll | 1 |
| #864 | 33398 scroll | 5 |
| #933 | 334 scroll | 1 |
| #1472 | 4-ball | 1 |
| #1433 | 5-ball | 1 |
| #1423 | 6-ball | 1 |
| #393 | 668 scroll | 1 |
| #923 | 7-Foot Dwarven mattock | 1 |
| #1485 | 7-ball | 1 |
| #2243 | 8-ball | 1 |
| #273 | Alewife™ Ale | 1 |
| #2228 | Ancient Saucehelm | 1 |
| #2096 | Angry Farmer candy | 1 |
| #1220 | Argarggagarg's fang | 1 |
| #733 | BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt | 1 |
| #675 | BGE temporary tattoo | 1 |
| #956 | BGE tiny plastic toy | 1 |
| 🥈 | C.B.F.G. | 1 |
| #588 | C.H.U.M. knife | 1 |
| #1013 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) | 1 |
| #529 | CRIMBCO lanyard | 1 |
| #1553 | CRIMBCO mug | 3 |
| #1702 | CRIMBCO scrip | 5 |
| #1937 | CRIMBCO wine | 1 |
| #1701 | CRIMBCOIDS mints | 3 |
| #369 | CRIMBCOLOAF | 7 |
| #208 | Colon Annihilation Hot Sauce | 2 |
| #479 | Corporal Fennel's Lonely Clubs Club Jacket | 1 |
| #1348 | Crimbo candied pecan | 1 |
| #1379 | Crimbo fudge | 1 |
| #1363 | Crimbo peppermint bark | 1 |
| #662 | Crimbuck | 1,433 |
| #4245 | Crown of the Goblin King | 1 |
| #12 | Dramatic™ range | 150 |
| #306 | FDKOL hotcakes | 10 |
| #724 | Jolly Roger charrrm | 2 |
| #234 | Knob nuts | 1 |
| #33 | Oreille Divisée brandy | 14 |
| #10 | Really Expensive Jewelry and You | 22 |
| #294 | Steal This Candy | 7 |
| #56 | The Big Book of Pirate Insults | 100 |
| 🥈 | The Spirit of Crimbo | 1 |
| #1038 | Warm Subject gift certificate | 2 |
| #363 | a butt tuba | 1 |
| #333 | abandoned candy | 1 |
| #1008 | acid-squirting flower | 1 |
| #1006 | acoustic guitarrr | 1 |
| #819 | adder bladder | 1 |
| #1432 | amulet of extreme plot significance | 1 |
| #658 | ancient Magi-Wipes | 1 |
| #671 | ancient protein powder | 1 |
| #533 | ancient spice | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #1079 | annoying pitchfork | 1 |
| #1064 | anticheese | 1 |
| #884 | antique greaves | 1 |
| #904 | antique shield | 1 |
| #946 | antique spear | 1 |
| #853 | arrrgyle socks | 1 |
| #1101 | asbestos ore | 1 |
| #386 | asbestos staff | 1 |
| #642 | asshat | 1 |
| #1924 | awful poetry journal | 1 |
| #407 | baconstone pendant | 1 |
| #5942 | badass belt | 3 |
| #764 | bag of Cheat-Os | 3 |
| #246 | ball-in-a-cup | 1 |
| #629 | ballroom blintz | 1 |
| #196 | bamboo bokuto | 1 |
| #1237 | bar skin | 1 |
| #122 | bar whip | 1 |
| #2120 | barrrnacle | 1 |
| #940 | bat guano | 1 |
| #1017 | bat wing | 1 |
| #783 | batblade | 1 |
| #1174 | batgut | 1 |
| #282 | beanbag chair | 1 |
| #965 | beer bomb | 1 |
| #540 | beer lens | 2 |
| #1005 | big red clown nose | 1 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg leg armor | 1 |
| #1500 | bit of clingfilm | 1 |
| #694 | black helmet | 1 |
| #1045 | black pixel | 1 |
| #2109 | black plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #2087 | black polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #667 | black shield | 1 |
| #724 | black sword | 1 |
| #204 | blue paisley oyster egg | 15 |
| #266 | blue plastic oyster egg | 18 |
| #2622 | blue striped oyster egg | 1 |
| #281 | bottle of Monsieur Bubble | 20 |
| #2555 | bottle of goofballs | 7 |
| #680 | bottle of pirate juice | 1 |
| #7445 | box of sunshine | 1 |
| #846 | burst hellseal brain | 1 |
| #1498 | can of CRIMBCOLA | 3 |
| #1107 | can of Red Minotaur | 1 |
| #4785 | candy cane | 1 |
| #701 | candy kneecapping stick | 4 |
| 🥈 | carbonite visor | 1 |
| #356 | chewing gum on a string | 25 |
| #392 | circular CRIMBCOOKIE | 4 |
| #2834 | eggnog | 1 |
| #1707 | elven suicide capsule | 7 |
| #1137 | fat stacks of cash | 2 |
| #59 | foam noodle | 40 |
| #351 | goat cheese | 53 |
| #211 | golden plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #4471 | grue egg | 2 |
| #11 | hemp string | 1,850 |
| #404 | herb brownies | 50 |
| #32 | inflatable duck | 175 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #1453 | jawbruiser | 2 |
| #2151 | killing feather | 13 |
| #2490 | laser-broiled pear | 9 |
| #1117 | lavender striped oyster egg | 2 |
| #975 | licorice garrote | 3 |
| #310 | lump of diamond | 8 |
| #1344 | motivational poster | 1 |
| #79 | nailswurst | 1 |
| #42 | party hat | 500 |
| #654 | patchouli incense stick | 7 |
| #330 | phish stick | 3 |
| #580 | probability potion | 42 |
| #256 | radium-flavored potato chips | 228 |
| #242 | rave whistle | 15 |
| #217 | red China marble | 1 |
| #2203 | red polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #3646 | rubber WWtNSD? bracelet | 1 |
| #479 | six pack of Mountain Stream | 6 |
| #1729 | square CRIMBCOOKIE | 1 |
| #4195 | stuffed Cheshire bitten | 9 |
| #4232 | stuffed MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech | 9 |
| #5706 | stuffed angry cow | 5 |
| #7818 | stuffed astral badger | 2 |
| #7016 | stuffed baby gravy fairy | 3 |
| #8820 | stuffed cocoabo | 1 |
| #5307 | stuffed flaming gravy fairy | 6 |
| #5330 | stuffed frozen gravy fairy | 6 |
| #5282 | stuffed hand turkey | 6 |
| #4939 | stuffed mind flayer | 7 |
| #4954 | stuffed scary death orb | 7 |
| #2452 | stuffed shoulder parrot | 6 |
| #7038 | stuffed sleazy gravy fairy | 3 |
| #5149 | stuffed snowy owl | 6 |
| #4941 | stuffed spooky gravy fairy | 7 |
| #1685 | stuffed spooky mushroom | 4 |
| #8868 | stuffed stinky gravy fairy | 1 |
| #4290 | stuffed undead elbow macaroni | 9 |
| #371 | sunken chest | 37 |
| #219 | targeting chip | 3 |
| #537 | tiny bottle of absinthe | 13 |
| #649 | tiny plastic 11 Dealer | 1 |
| #3074 | tiny plastic Boss Bat | 1 |
| #6213 | tiny plastic Cheshire bat | 2 |
| #620 | tiny plastic Crimbo Casino | 1 |
| #577 | tiny plastic Crimbomination | 1 |
| #632 | tiny plastic Don Crimbo | 1 |
| #3904 | tiny plastic Hellion | 1 |
| #3878 | tiny plastic Iiti Kitty | 1 |
| #3071 | tiny plastic Knob Goblin King | 1 |
| #3865 | tiny plastic Knob Goblin harem girl | 1 |
| #3866 | tiny plastic Protagonist | 1 |
| #3919 | tiny plastic Trouser Snake | 1 |
| #6105 | tiny plastic angry goat | 2 |
| #3964 | tiny plastic baby gravy fairy | 4 |
| #8108 | tiny plastic barrrnacle | 1 |
| #4472 | tiny plastic bitchin' meatcar | 1 |
| #3946 | tiny plastic brainsweeper | 1 |
| #4866 | tiny plastic cocoabo | 3 |
| #8210 | tiny plastic coffee pixie | 1 |
| #3907 | tiny plastic filthy hippy jewelry maker | 1 |
| #8145 | tiny plastic fuzzy dice | 1 |
| #6227 | tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick | 2 |
| #4802 | tiny plastic ghuol whelp | 3 |
| #3855 | tiny plastic goth giant | 1 |
| #6085 | tiny plastic grue | 2 |
| #2788 | tiny plastic handsome mariachi | 2 |
| #8115 | tiny plastic howling balloon monkey | 1 |
| #3897 | tiny plastic killer bee | 4 |
| #8190 | tiny plastic leprechaun | 1 |
| #3930 | tiny plastic levitating potato | 4 |
| #3832 | tiny plastic lobsterfrogman | 1 |
| #3970 | tiny plastic mosquito | 4 |
| #3992 | tiny plastic ninja snowman | 1 |
| #4340 | tiny plastic pastamancer | 1 |
| #3296 | tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime | 5 |
| #4459 | tiny plastic sauceror | 1 |
| #3848 | tiny plastic senile lihc | 1 |
| #8214 | tiny plastic spooky pirate skeleton | 1 |
| #3926 | tiny plastic spooky vampire | 1 |
| #6123 | tiny plastic stab bat | 2 |
| #4882 | tiny plastic star starfish | 3 |
| #585 | tiny plastic stocking mimic | 1 |
| #3855 | tiny plastic topiary golem | 1 |
| #4474 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 1 |
| #3865 | tiny plastic warwelf | 1 |
| #896 | tires | 1 |
| #1653 | toast | 191 |
| #446 | torn hellseal sinew | 7 |
| #1159 | triangular CRIMBCOOKIE | 2 |
| #2163 | unstable laser battery | 22 |
| #937 | water pipe bomb | 1 |
| #67 | water wings | 20 |
| #1095 | yeti fur | 20 |