| #113 | "Humorous" T-shirt | 1 |
| #163 | Cerebral Cloche | 1 |
| #311 | Cerebral Crossbow | 1 |
| #188 | Cerebral Culottes | 1 |
| #264 | Cherry Cloaca Cola | 4 |
| #1485 | Cloaca-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1417 | Cloaca-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #1425 | Cloaca-Cola shield | 1 |
| #173 | Diet Cloaca Cola | 9 |
| #2054 | Dyspepsi-Cola | 1 |
| #1403 | Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1414 | Dyspepsi-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #1374 | Dyspepsi-Cola shield | 1 |
| #1689 | Feynman gate | 1 |
| #414 | Imp Ale | 426 |
| #692 | Jumbo Dr. Lucifer | 6 |
| #1004 | Knob Goblin harem pants | 1 |
| #995 | Knob Goblin harem veil | 1 |
| #968 | Lord of the Flies-sized fries | 1 |
| #1987 | MagiMechTech NanoMechaMech | 1 |
| #536 | Mountain Stream soda | 20 |
| #693 | Ram's Face Lager | 8 |
| #252 | Regular Cloaca Cola | 4 |
| #328 | White Citadel burger | 4 |
| #284 | White Citadel fries | 4 |
| #854 | Wint-O-Fresh mint | 10 |
| #706 | a little sump'm sump'm | 1 |
| #1654 | ancient unspeakable fruitcake | 4 |
| #884 | antique greaves | 1 |
| #893 | antique helmet | 1 |
| #904 | antique shield | 1 |
| #946 | antique spear | 1 |
| #2065 | astronaut pants | 1 |
| #1089 | atomic vector plotter | 1 |
| #1885 | bag of airline peanuts | 1 |
| #429 | balaclava | 1 |
| #998 | bat-shaped Crimboween cookie | 2 |
| #1023 | bi-lateral logic compressor | 1 |
| #1005 | big red clown nose | 1 |
| #965 | bloody clown pants | 1 |
| 🥈 | blue ribbon | 1 |
| #314 | bottle of popskull | 6 |
| #2703 | brick | 1 |
| #1104 | bugbear beanie | 1 |
| #1111 | bugbear bungguard | 1 |
| #534 | calle de miel | 1 |
| #547 | can of fake snow | 1 |
| #4785 | candy cane | 1 |
| #814 | candy stake | 8 |
| #1757 | capacitor relay | 1 |
| #1810 | carbon nanotube frame | 1 |
| #820 | chopsticks | 1 |
| #102 | clockwork hat | 1 |
| #101 | clockwork pants | 1 |
| #154 | clockwork trench coat | 1 |
| #797 | clown shoes | 1 |
| #508 | colored-light "necklace" | 1 |
| #1057 | computronic processing unit | 1 |
| #178 | deactivated MicroMechaMech | 1 |
| #531 | disbelief suspenders | 1 |
| #895 | dry noodles | 6 |
| #516 | ducha de oro | 1 |
| #896 | eXtreme mittens | 1 |
| #854 | eXtreme scarf | 1 |
| #2834 | eggnog | 1 |
| #2680 | evil teddy bear | 1 |
| #1646 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 2 |
| #508 | extra-spicy bloody mary | 1 |
| #1989 | fake fake vomit | 1 |
| #1793 | fake hand | 1 |
| #1148 | fancy but probably evil chocolate | 5 |
| #2423 | fancy dress ball | 1 |
| #997 | filthy corduroys | 1 |
| #970 | filthy knitted dread sack | 1 |
| #1759 | fire | 1 |
| #788 | foolscap fool's cap | 1 |
| #1091 | frigid ninja stars | 1 |
| #731 | frozen nunchaku | 1 |
| #603 | fuzzbump | 1 |
| #1638 | giant discarded bottlecap | 1 |
| #2409 | giant discarded plastic fork | 1 |
| #1517 | giant discarded torn-up glove | 1 |
| #3934 | gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #1070 | gingerbread horror | 6 |
| #222 | grass blade | 1 |
| #193 | grass hat | 1 |
| #188 | grass skirt | 1 |
| #1111 | high-resistance ultrapolymer plating | 1 |
| #1000 | hot katana blade | 1 |
| #330 | hot wing | 211 |
| #1027 | hyperbolic plasma focuser | 1 |
| #277 | ice stein | 1 |
| #497 | ice-cold Sir Schlitz | 191 |
| #536 | ice-cold Willer | 70 |
| #888 | ice-cold fotie | 8 |
| #424 | icy-hot katana | 1 |
| #1371 | incredibly creepy marionette | 1 |
| #1776 | ion grid | 1 |
| #1082 | ion-pulse modulation stabilizer | 1 |
| #1195 | jabañero-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #1831 | jazz soap | 1 |
| #1885 | joybuzzer | 1 |
| #1288 | killer rag doll | 1 |
| #2180 | lavender paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #1209 | lime-and-chile-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #1725 | logic synthesizer | 1 |
| #375 | los chinos | 1 |
| #1349 | mad scientist's sock monkey | 1 |
| #1896 | magical ice cube with a fly in it | 1 |
| #2385 | mauve striped oyster egg | 1 |
| #627 | ninja mop | 1 |
| #1732 | off-white polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #218 | onion shurikens | 1 |
| #472 | perpendicular hula | 1 |
| #2033 | pet rock | 2 |
| #1653 | pet rock "Groucho" disguise | 1 |
| #1884 | pet rock "Snooty" disguise | 1 |
| #1235 | pickle-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #1155 | pink candy heart | 1 |
| #286 | pixel hat | 1 |
| #159 | pixel pants | 1 |
| #209 | pixel sword | 1 |
| #358 | polka-dot bow tie | 1 |
| #2220 | possessed top | 1 |
| #1614 | prehistoric spear | 1 |
| #2250 | puce polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #465 | purple-frosted astral cupcake | 2 |
| #1069 | quantum polarity inducer | 1 |
| #2248 | razor-tipped yo-yo | 1 |
| #1006 | recursive spline reticulator | 1 |
| #1109 | reverse-oscillating klystron | 1 |
| #665 | ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon | 1 |
| #493 | roll in the hay | 1 |
| #1959 | rubber emo roe | 1 |
| #1089 | servomechanical torsion facilitator | 1 |
| #2957 | shiny ring | 1 |
| #1807 | skull-shaped Crimboween cookie | 1 |
| #547 | slap and tickle | 1 |
| #799 | snowboarder pants | 1 |
| #705 | spooky eggnog | 8 |
| #832 | spooky hockey mask | 2 |
| #1520 | stick-on-a-string | 1 |
| #3171 | stuffed alien blob | 1 |
| #8935 | stuffed scary death orb | 1 |
| #1050 | sub-molecular interocitor | 1 |
| #524 | sweet ninja sword | 1 |
| #1188 | ten-leaf clover | 1 |
| #1548 | tiny plastic Crimboween pentagram | 1 |
| #1530 | tiny plastic Scream Queen | 1 |
| #1731 | tiny plastic ancient yuletide troll | 1 |
| #1736 | tiny plastic gift-wrapping vampire | 1 |
| #1557 | tiny plastic skeletal reindeer | 1 |
| #2525 | toothsome rock | 1 |
| #2400 | toy crazy train | 1 |
| #2210 | toy jet pack | 1 |
| #2128 | toy mercenary | 1 |
| #2475 | toy ray gun | 1 |
| #2262 | toy space helmet | 1 |
| #479 | tree skirt | 1 |
| #3145 | tree-eating kite | 1 |
| #2526 | vampire duck-on-a-string | 1 |
| #1538 | wheel | 1 |
| #1752 | whoopie cushion | 2 |
| #2053 | wind-up chattering teeth | 1 |
| #2204 | yo | 1 |