| #307 | A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes | 3 |
| #67 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 | 3 |
| 🥇 | BRAINS shorts | 7,449 |
| 🥈 | Bartles and BRAAAINS wine cooler | 8,257 |
| #21 | Batfellow comic | 14 |
| #20 | Boris's Helm | 1 |
| #18 | Build-a-City Gingerbread kit | 1 |
| #107 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) | 5 |
| #1009 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) | 1 |
| #46 | Camp Scout backpack | 1 |
| 🥇 | Celsius 233 | 104 |
| #101 | Cinco Mayo Lager | 3 |
| #51 | Crown of Thrones | 1 |
| #13 | Dear Past Self Package | 1 |
| #25 | Doc Clock's thyme cocktail | 2 |
| #51 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy | 3 |
| #18 | LT&T telegraph office deed | 1 |
| #94 | Libram of BRICKOs | 1 |
| #5 | Rethinking Candy | 4 |
| #90 | Schrödinger's thermos | 420 |
| #601 | The Art of Slapfighting | 1 |
| #681 | The Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones | 1 |
| #137 | The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder | 1 |
| #24 | The Confiscator's Grimoire | 1 |
| #336 | The Cooler Out of Space | 6 |
| #41 | The Smith's Tome | 1 |
| #1558 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 1 |
| #36 | Thwaitgold bee statuette | 15 |
| #196 | Thwaitgold bug statuette | 8 |
| #1013 | Thwaitgold butterfly statuette | 1 |
| #1398 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 2 |
| #519 | Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette | 6 |
| #88 | Thwaitgold maggot statuette | 19 |
| #623 | Thwaitgold praying mantis statuette | 1 |
| #694 | Thwaitgold scarab beetle statuette | 5 |
| #387 | Thwaitgold stag beetle statuette | 16 |
| #219 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 54 |
| #851 | Uncle Crimbo's Rations | 2 |
| #9 | Witchess Set | 1 |
| #121 | antique 8-Bit Power magazine | 12 |
| #13 | antique painting of a landscape | 50 |
| #571 | antique pair of blue jeans | 1 |
| #343 | antique record album | 9 |
| #11 | antique souvenir drawing | 44 |
| #246 | ball-in-a-cup | 1 |
| #661 | battered Crimbo Crate | 13 |
| #88 | beautiful rainbow | 5 |
| #14 | bitter pill | 7 |
| #16 | bottled day | 8 |
| #94 | bottled green pixie | 1 |
| #48 | box of bear arms | 1 |
| #31 | caustic slime nodule | 15 |
| #230 | chocolate cigar | 8 |
| #508 | colored-light "necklace" | 1 |
| #681 | colorful plastic ball | 1 |
| 🥈 | corked genie bottle | 8 |
| #189 | deluxe fax machine | 2 |
| #17 | disconnected intergnat | 1 |
| #53 | haiku katana | 2 |
| #236 | handmade hobby horse | 1 |
| #40 | moveable feast | 1 |
| #212 | natty blue ascot | 2 |
| #5 | necrotizing body spray | 4,395 |
| #27 | pet bad vibe | 1 |
| #178 | phish stick | 6 |
| #169 | pile of loose snow | 1 |
| #75 | quantum taco | 500 |
| 🥇 | sorority brain | 5,974 |
| #5 | tattered scrap of paper | 9,000 |