| #114 | 1.21 jigawatts | 1 |
| #1458 | Amulet of Yendor | 1 |
| #1728 | Cloaca grenade | 1 |
| #1496 | Cloaca-Cola | 1 |
| #1151 | Cloaca-Cola c-rations | 1 |
| #1486 | Cloaca-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1418 | Cloaca-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #904 | Cloaca-Cola knapsack | 1 |
| #1426 | Cloaca-Cola shield | 1 |
| #610 | Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife | 1 |
| #281 | Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration | 1 |
| #1666 | Dyspepsi grenade | 1 |
| #2054 | Dyspepsi-Cola | 1 |
| #1084 | Dyspepsi-Cola d-rations | 1 |
| #1404 | Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1415 | Dyspepsi-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #857 | Dyspepsi-Cola knapsack | 1 |
| #1375 | Dyspepsi-Cola shield | 1 |
| #580 | Dyspepsi-Cola-issue canteen | 1 |
| #277 | Gazpacho's Glacial Grimoire | 1 |
| #613 | Hell ramen | 1 |
| 🥈 | Junior LAAAAME merit badge | 1 |
| #723 | Lucky Surprise Egg | 1 |
| #2247 | Mob Penguin cellular phone | 1 |
| #172 | Super Magic Power Sword X | 1 |
| #711 | Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix | 1 |
| #1623 | Valentine | 5 |
| #1286 | Wand of Nagamar | 1 |
| #1478 | abominable snowcone | 1 |
| #2445 | baconstone | 1 |
| #407 | baconstone pendant | 1 |
| #7432 | badass belt | 1 |
| #1885 | bag of airline peanuts | 1 |
| #2562 | black paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #2087 | black polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #812 | black snowcone | 1 |
| #2553 | blue paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #2374 | blue polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #877 | blue snowcone | 1 |
| #2621 | blue striped oyster egg | 1 |
| #5030 | bottle of goofballs | 1 |
| #6711 | box of sunshine | 2 |
| #247 | brains casserole | 1 |
| #2704 | brick | 1 |
| #1817 | can of Binarrrca | 1 |
| #1108 | can of Red Minotaur | 1 |
| #547 | can of fake snow | 1 |
| #856 | candy brain | 1 |
| #4784 | candy cane | 1 |
| #330 | cardboard katana | 1 |
| #683 | cardboard wakizashi | 1 |
| #1187 | cheap plastic bottle opener | 4 |
| #109 | chocolate box | 1 |
| #821 | chopsticks | 1 |
| #1796 | clown hammer | 1 |
| #559 | cold ninja mask | 3 |
| #508 | colored-light "necklace" | 1 |
| #1129 | dry noodles | 1 |
| #228 | eXtreme nose ring | 1 |
| #4231 | easter egg balloon | 2 |
| #2835 | eggnog | 1 |
| #870 | empty blowgun | 1 |
| #1776 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 1 |
| #1989 | fake fake vomit | 1 |
| #1792 | fake hand | 1 |
| #2519 | fancy chocolate | 1 |
| #303 | fez of etymology | 1 |
| #528 | flange | 2 |
| #449 | fricasseed brains | 1 |
| #753 | frigid ninja stars | 12 |
| #826 | frozen mushroom | 1 |
| #731 | frozen nunchaku | 1 |
| #3426 | fruitcake | 1 |
| #1921 | ghost cucumber | 1 |
| #3936 | gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #1908 | green beer | 1 |
| #841 | green snowcone | 1 |
| #2398 | hamethyst | 1 |
| #264 | hamethyst ring | 1 |
| #234 | henna tattoo | 3 |
| #424 | icy-hot katana | 1 |
| #1832 | jazz soap | 1 |
| #1885 | joybuzzer | 1 |
| #2029 | lavender polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #1895 | magical ice cube with a fly in it | 1 |
| #1086 | marionette | 1 |
| #1982 | mauve paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #405 | mugcake | 4 |
| #857 | ninja hot pants | 1 |
| #628 | ninja mop | 1 |
| #1822 | off-white plastic oyster egg | 2 |
| #218 | onion shurikens | 1 |
| #860 | orange snowcone | 1 |
| #865 | oriole-feather headdress | 1 |
| #1716 | pet rock "Snooty" disguise | 2 |
| #745 | picture of a dead guy's girlfriend | 1 |
| #2212 | porquoise | 1 |
| #294 | porquoise necklace | 1 |
| #2033 | puce paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #2102 | puce plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #2250 | puce polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #891 | purple snowcone | 1 |
| #2227 | red paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #2537 | red plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #845 | red snowcone | 1 |
| #9 | red traffic cone | 1 |
| #609 | rice bowl | 1 |
| #890 | ridiculously huge sword | 3 |
| #666 | ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon | 1 |
| #810 | ring of aggravate monster | 3 |
| #352 | ring of cold resistance | 1 |
| #338 | ring of fire resistance | 1 |
| #858 | ring of half-assed regeneration | 2 |
| #415 | ring of increase damage | 1 |
| #10 | rose-colored glasses | 1 |
| #1959 | rubber emo roe | 1 |
| #237 | slap and tickle with a fly in it | 1 |
| #284 | spaghetti with Skullheads | 2 |
| #1391 | spectral pickle | 1 |
| #1479 | spooky hockey mask | 1 |
| #1130 | squashed frog | 1 |
| #193 | star throwing star | 1 |
| #1574 | stuffed dodecapede | 1 |
| #776 | stuffed zmobie | 1 |
| #524 | sweet ninja sword | 1 |
| #500 | teeny-tiny ninja stars | 1 |
| #1216 | thin black candle | 12 |
| #625 | tiny ninja sword | 1 |
| #2947 | tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo | 1 |
| #4533 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 1 |
| #8194 | tiny plastic angry goat | 1 |
| #8079 | tiny plastic cocoabo | 1 |
| #8207 | tiny plastic coffee pixie | 1 |
| #8054 | tiny plastic killer bee | 1 |
| #8097 | tiny plastic mosquito | 1 |
| #33 | tires | 1,050 |
| #1055 | toast | 566 |
| #1190 | toy soldier | 1 |
| #479 | tree skirt | 1 |
| #538 | twinkly nuggets | 1 |
| #515 | twinkly powder | 1 |
| #1078 | twinkly wad | 1 |
| #227 | white balloon | 55 |
| #1937 | whoopie cushion | 1 |
| #2053 | wind-up chattering teeth | 1 |
| #2048 | yellow plastic oyster egg | 2 |
| #2120 | yellow snowcone | 1 |