| 🥇 | Franken Stein | 1 |
| #1224 | 33398 scroll | 1 |
| #967 | A. W. O. L. commendation | 1 |
| #62 | BROS Energy Drink | 1 |
| #408 | Bit O' Ectoplasm | 5 |
| #933 | Breathetasticâ„¢ Premium Canned Air | 3 |
| #51 | ChibiBuddyâ„¢ (off) | 1 |
| #288 | Cinco Mayo Lager | 1 |
| #15 | Clan VIP Lounge invitation | 4 |
| #7 | Congressional Medal of Insanity | 1 |
| #272 | Crimbo ukulele | 1 |
| #2374 | Crimboween memo | 1 |
| #4 | CyberRealm keycode | 2 |
| #1051 | Ent cider | 2 |
| #77 | Flaming Mohobo | 1 |
| #89 | Fly-By-Knight Heraldry form | 1 |
| #31 | Fog Murderer | 11 |
| #15 | Gorillape | 1 |
| #425 | Imp Ale | 409 |
| #60 | Juju Mojo Mask | 1 |
| #8 | McHugeLarge deluxe ski set | 4 |
| #138 | Mon Tiki | 11 |
| #23 | Mr. Accessory | 10 |
| #34 | Ram's Face Lager | 3,164 |
| #15 | Sealed TakerSpace letter of Marque | 4 |
| #87 | The Encyclopedia of Fruit | 1 |
| #249 | Tiki lighter | 2 |
| #1250 | Uncle Crimbo's Rations | 1 |
| #200 | Unionize The Elves sign | 1 |
| #262 | Zu Mannkäse Dienen | 8 |
| #680 | anniversary balloon | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary balsa wood socks | 1 |
| 🥇 | anniversary burlap belt | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #2604 | anniversary gift box | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary pewter cape | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary tiny latex mask | 1 |
| #144 | antique 8-Bit Power magazine | 10 |
| #24 | antique bottle opener | 26 |
| #573 | antique pair of blue jeans | 1 |
| #8 | baby bark scorpion | 5 |
| #151 | baconstone | 45 |
| #287 | bag of lard | 4 |
| 🥇 | bejazzled eyepatch | 1 |
| #347 | big bad voodoo mask | 1 |
| #137 | blank diary | 1 |
| #2231 | bottle of goofballs | 9 |
| #1016 | bottle of rum | 11 |
| #5 | bowler | 16 |
| #50 | box of Gratitude chocolates | 2 |
| #78 | boxed Apriling band helmet | 1 |
| #43 | boxed bat wings | 2 |
| #15 | bread man | 18 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #116 | can of Swiller | 48 |
| #956 | can of spinach | 1 |
| #54 | cheap Chinese beer | 6 |
| #2110 | chunk of depleted Grimacite | 1 |
| #834 | coconut shell | 11 |
| #105 | colored-light "necklace" | 3 |
| #26 | comfy blanket | 1 |
| #7 | conquistador's breastplate | 1 |
| 🥉 | control crystal | 1 |
| #9 | crazy bastard sword | 3 |
| #261 | crystallized memory | 1 |
| #82 | cursed monkey glove | 1 |
| #618 | deck of tropical cards | 1 |
| #22 | dense meat stack | 1,000,000 |
| #154 | depleted Grimacite kneecapping stick | 3 |
| #6 | egg gun | 3 |
| #303 | fez of etymology | 1 |
| #529 | fire poi | 1 |
| #36 | floaty gravel | 4 |
| #164 | floaty inverse geode | 1 |
| #90 | floaty rock | 1 |
| #269 | floral print shirt | 1 |
| #15 | gilded trumpet | 1 |
| #194 | grass hat | 1 |
| #183 | grog | 11 |
| #165 | hamethyst | 44 |
| #1743 | herbal stuffing | 3 |
| #103 | hermit factoid | 1 |
| #231 | hot egg | 1 |
| #18 | hypnodisk | 1 |
| #1604 | iGoogly | 1 |
| #262 | ice-cold Sir Schlitz | 813 |
| #565 | ice-cold Willer | 65 |
| #160 | ice-cold fotie | 324 |
| #133 | ice-cold six-pack | 129 |
| #284 | jungle drum | 1 |
| #536 | lime | 11 |
| #1297 | little paper umbrella | 1 |
| #373 | loaded serum blowgun | 11 |
| #284 | lovecat tail | 3 |
| #218 | lucky Crimbo tiki necklace | 1 |
| #51 | mineapple | 12 |
| #56 | mini kiwi egg | 1 |
| #6 | moaiball | 1 |
| #4 | name change form | 2 |
| #96 | nasty rat mask | 1 |
| #65 | ninja pirate zombie robot | 1 |
| 🥈 | ninjammies | 7 |
| #864 | oriole-feather headdress | 1 |
| 🥇 | overflowing gift basket | 1 |
| #146 | overpriced "imported" beer | 1 |
| #55 | packaged model train set | 1 |
| #5 | paint palette | 26 |
| #17 | peace turkey outline | 3 |
| #88 | phish stick | 12 |
| #14 | photo booth sized crate | 1 |
| #82 | pilgrim shield | 1 |
| #165 | porquoise | 40 |
| #95 | potato alarm clock | 1 |
| #8 | potato jacket | 1 |
| #97 | prank Crimbo card | 1 |
| #623 | pretty bouquet | 1 |
| 🥉 | primitive alien blowgun | 1 |
| #128 | psycho sweater | 3 |
| #220 | questionable taco | 2 |
| #227 | raffle prize box | 1 |
| #140 | recording of Donho's Bubbly Ballad | 1 |
| #249 | roasted marshmallow | 152 |
| #84 | seal-clubbing club | 1,190 |
| #155 | seal-skull helmet | 145 |
| #422 | severed rocking horse head | 1 |
| #54 | shark tooth necklace | 1 |
| #28 | shimmering rainbow sand | 26 |
| #17 | shining star cap | 1 |
| #940 | skull-shaped Crimboween cookie | 2 |
| #14 | space blanket | 129 |
| #6 | space pirate treasure map | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #305 | spooky hockey mask | 5 |
| #71 | strange helix fossil | 1 |
| #131 | sub-molecular interocitor | 30 |
| #2610 | tiny plastic seal clubber | 2 |
| 🥇 | toast | 5,328,465 |
| #1842 | towel | 1 |
| #355 | twinkly wad | 430 |
| #33 | unevolved organism | 1 |
| #40 | unoccupied sheep suit | 1 |
| #55 | untorn tearaway pants package | 1 |
| #329 | volcanic ash | 11 |
| #601 | voodoo snuff | 1 |