| #883 | Biddy Cracker's Old-Fashioned Cookbook | 1 |
| 🥈 | C.B.F.G. | 1 |
| #1488 | Cloaca-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1419 | Cloaca-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #1429 | Cloaca-Cola shield | 1 |
| #1369 | Copper Alpha of Sincerity | 1 |
| #129 | Discount Telescope Warehouse gift certificate | 2 |
| #1406 | Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1417 | Dyspepsi-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #1376 | Dyspepsi-Cola shield | 1 |
| #1440 | Green Clover of Justice | 1 |
| #1674 | Iron Beta of Industry | 1 |
| #1574 | Nickel Gamma of Frugality | 1 |
| #1269 | Orange Star of Sacrifice | 1 |
| #725 | Pan-Dimensional Gargle Blaster | 10 |
| #814 | Pink Heart of Spirit | 1 |
| #1612 | Yellow Moon of Compassion | 1 |
| #1883 | anniversary gift box | 2 |
| #24 | banana smoothie | 70 |
| #103 | bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme | 1 |
| 🥈 | biomechanical crimborg helmet | 1 |
| #5026 | bottle of goofballs | 1 |
| #1075 | bottle of single-barrel whiskey | 1 |
| #771 | bouquet of circular saw blades | 1 |
| #1948 | box of sunshine | 71 |
| #13 | brick of sand | 147 |
| #1107 | can of Red Minotaur | 1 |
| #110 | candy cornucopia | 1 |
| #939 | chocolate-covered diamond-studded roses | 1 |
| #102 | clockwork hat | 1 |
| #101 | clockwork pants | 1 |
| #154 | clockwork trench coat | 1 |
| #145 | cocoa egg | 103 |
| #555 | concentrated garbage juice | 1 |
| #35 | cursed breeches | 1 |
| #64 | cursed cutlass | 1 |
| #42 | cursed eyepatch | 1 |
| #67 | divine champagne flute | 360 |
| #232 | duct tape sword | 1 |
| #1083 | enchanted leopard-print barbell | 5 |
| #1710 | filthy lucre | 4 |
| #80 | foreign box | 2 |
| #365 | gloomy mushroom wine | 1 |
| #2378 | golden ring | 16 |
| #190 | handful of confetti | 167 |
| #3382 | heart necklace | 1 |
| #247 | makeshift cape | 1 |
| #171 | makeshift skirt | 1 |
| #181 | makeshift turban | 1 |
| #278 | oily mushroom wine | 1 |
| #2126 | polyalloy shield | 1 |
| #1729 | really dense meat stack | 1 |
| #691 | rogue swarmer | 64 |
| #92 | sandcastle | 1 |
| #602 | sandwich of the gods | 12 |
| #1479 | sawblade fragment | 38 |
| #318 | sinister altar fragment | 1 |
| #2845 | solid gold bowling ball | 1 |
| #155 | spectre scepter | 168 |
| #939 | strange shiny disc | 1 |
| #410 | stuffed Hodgman | 1 |
| #1032 | unstable laser battery | 45 |
| #1777 | vibrating cyborg knife | 4 |