| #583 | Amulet of Yendor | 32 |
| #6 | Junior Adventurer's merit badge | 1 |
| #82 | Libram of Divine Favors | 1 |
| #423 | Loudmouth Larry Lamprey | 91 |
| #211 | Ralph IX cognac | 1 |
| #6 | STYX deodorant body spray | 1 |
| #110 | abominable snowcone | 226 |
| #6 | awful poetry journal | 204,740 |
| #1849 | baby killer bee | 1 |
| #1151 | bag of airline peanuts | 14 |
| #241 | balloon monkey | 7 |
| #469 | barrrnacle | 33 |
| #399 | black candy heart | 21 |
| #424 | black-and-blue light | 100 |
| #413 | blue plasma ball | 102 |
| 🥈 | blue ribbon | 1 |
| #1437 | box of sunshine | 126 |
| #249 | calle de miel with a fly in it | 1 |
| #1823 | cheap plastic bottle opener | 1 |
| #455 | cheap studded belt | 66 |
| #1028 | clown hammer | 18 |
| #99 | cotton candy cocoon | 1 |
| #737 | defective skull | 23 |
| #10 | disturbing fanfic | 118,882 |
| #635 | encoder ring | 18 |
| #1137 | explosion-flavored chewing gum | 13 |
| #879 | fake fake vomit | 29 |
| #1540 | fake hand | 3 |
| #19 | flashing novelty button | 13 |
| #520 | flavored foot massage oil | 40 |
| #411 | foam dart | 87 |
| #2296 | fuzzy dice | 3 |
| #850 | grue egg | 31 |
| #924 | jazz soap | 24 |
| #1067 | joybuzzer | 17 |
| #235 | leprechaun hatchling | 2 |
| #794 | magical ice cube with a fly in it | 32 |
| #352 | mood ring | 25 |
| #942 | orange | 1 |
| #10 | orange glowstick | 26 |
| #133 | packet of mayfly bait | 1 |
| #548 | personal massager | 12 |
| #546 | personalized coffee mug | 78 |
| #772 | pet rock "Groucho" disguise | 25 |
| #1045 | pet rock "Snooty" disguise | 18 |
| #1433 | portable corkscrew | 1 |
| #1168 | potato sprout | 1 |
| #889 | rubber emo roe | 30 |
| #511 | shingle | 6 |
| #353 | spaghetti with Skullheads | 1 |
| #384 | stick-on eyebrow piercing | 98 |
| #422 | string of blue beads | 27 |
| #550 | string of green beads | 22 |
| #445 | string of red beads | 26 |
| #1963 | teddy borg | 1 |
| #6 | tin rations | 3 |
| #8 | trusty torch | 1 |
| #5 | white-label gin | 3 |
| #1609 | whoopie cushion | 4 |
| #1128 | wind-up chattering teeth | 18 |
| #621 | x-ray specs | 28 |
| #741 | yellow snowcone | 43 |