| #3370 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 2 |
| #1728 | Cloaca grenade | 1 |
| #1485 | Cloaca-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #1417 | Cloaca-Cola helmet | 1 |
| #904 | Cloaca-Cola knapsack | 1 |
| #1425 | Cloaca-Cola shield | 1 |
| #610 | Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife | 1 |
| #2647 | Crown of the Goblin King | 5 |
| #1084 | Dyspepsi-Cola d-rations | 1 |
| #1782 | El Sombrero De Lopez | 1 |
| #52 | Gummi-Gnauga | 110 |
| #18 | Lord of the Flies-sized fries | 2,037 |
| #1757 | Mob Penguin cellular phone | 3 |
| #282 | Raggedy Hippy doll | 1 |
| #200 | Unionize The Elves sign | 1 |
| #2404 | Valentine | 1 |
| #131 | White Citadel fries | 11 |
| #116 | alpha-mail pants | 1 |
| #1432 | amulet of extreme plot significance | 1 |
| #147 | apathetic lizardman doll | 1 |
| #769 | aspirin | 1 |
| #1269 | awful poetry journal | 12 |
| #1321 | baby killer bee | 3 |
| #6543 | badass belt | 2 |
| #97 | basic meat fez | 1 |
| #520 | bell-shaped Crimbo cookie | 2 |
| 🥈 | blue traffic cone | 1 |
| #3302 | bottle of goofballs | 4 |
| #1066 | bottle of single-barrel whiskey | 1 |
| #6710 | box of sunshine | 2 |
| #793 | bugbear beanie | 3 |
| #2974 | can-shaped gelatinous cranberry sauce | 1 |
| #1457 | dill | 3 |
| #1475 | duck-on-a-string | 1 |
| #870 | empty blowgun | 1 |
| #145 | exotic orchid | 1 |
| #968 | fancy chocolate | 3 |
| #303 | fez of etymology | 1 |
| #879 | fine wine | 1 |
| #3214 | fuzzy dice | 2 |
| #1516 | ghost cucumber | 6 |
| #77 | giant stuffed bugbear | 1 |
| #2002 | gingerbread bugbear | 6 |
| #516 | green balloon | 3 |
| #2061 | kite | 1 |
| #960 | loaded serum blowgun | 4 |
| #1458 | mafia aria | 5 |
| #1086 | marionette | 1 |
| #2254 | mauve plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| 🥇 | old-fashioned Crimbo Pressie | 1 |
| #84 | penguinskin mini-skirt | 1 |
| #2714 | pet rock | 1 |
| #745 | picture of a dead guy's girlfriend | 1 |
| #1205 | piece of wedding cake | 1 |
| #1725 | pixellated candy heart | 2 |
| #1303 | rag doll | 1 |
| #938 | spectral pickle | 5 |
| #494 | stuffed can of asparagus | 9 |
| #718 | stuffed dodecapede | 3 |
| #2480 | stuffed doppelshifter | 2 |
| #83 | stuffed sabre-toothed lime | 1 |
| #367 | sucky decal | 5 |
| #1488 | support cummerbund | 1 |
| #2031 | teddy bear | 1 |
| #4308 | tiny plastic Crimbo elf | 1 |
| #4228 | tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #2898 | tiny plastic Crimbo wreath | 1 |
| #2947 | tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo | 1 |
| #4533 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 1 |
| #4490 | tiny plastic disco bandit | 1 |
| #6063 | tiny plastic killer bee | 2 |
| #4459 | tiny plastic sauceror | 1 |
| #4037 | tiny plastic sweet nutcracker | 1 |
| #4474 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 1 |
| #2068 | top | 1 |
| #1190 | toy soldier | 1 |
| #891 | toy train | 2 |
| #1819 | vertebra of the Bonerdagon | 1 |
| #537 | white balloon | 3 |
| #2053 | wind-up chattering teeth | 1 |
| #1041 | wreath-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |
| #1017 | zombie pineal gland | 4 |