| #113 | "Humorous" T-shirt | 1 |
| #1047 | 2-ball | 2 |
| #1638 | 8-ball | 4 |
| #1272 | Amulet of Yendor | 3 |
| #2228 | Ancient Saucehelm | 1 |
| #508 | Black No. 2 | 6 |
| #299 | Blackfly Chardonnay | 11 |
| #118 | Cherry Cloaca Cola | 16 |
| #830 | Cloaca-Cola | 24 |
| #1151 | Cloaca-Cola c-rations | 1 |
| #1485 | Cloaca-Cola fatigues | 1 |
| #997 | Cloaca-Cola helmet | 2 |
| #904 | Cloaca-Cola knapsack | 1 |
| #1425 | Cloaca-Cola shield | 1 |
| #354 | Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife | 2 |
| #280 | Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration | 1 |
| #4245 | Crown of the Goblin King | 1 |
| #95 | Diet Cloaca Cola | 15 |
| #1940 | Dolphin King's crown | 1 |
| #126 | Frost™ brand sword | 1 |
| #365 | Knob Goblin melon baller | 4 |
| #321 | Knob Goblin seltzer | 44 |
| #240 | Knob Goblin spatula | 46 |
| #379 | Knob Goblin steroids | 21 |
| #482 | Knob Goblin superseltzer | 6 |
| #717 | Knob Goblin tongs | 6 |
| #793 | M-242 | 6 |
| #400 | Manetwich | 1 |
| #129 | New Cloaca-Cola | 1 |
| #470 | Queue Du Coq cocktailcrafting kit | 1 |
| #98 | Regular Cloaca Cola | 15 |
| #237 | WA | 1 |
| #1012 | amulet of extreme plot significance | 4 |
| #638 | ancient frozen dinner | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| #681 | annoying pitchfork | 3 |
| #893 | antique helmet | 1 |
| #853 | arrrgyle socks | 1 |
| #5464 | badass belt | 4 |
| #1885 | bag of airline peanuts | 1 |
| #1026 | balloon monkey | 1 |
| #381 | black forest cake | 6 |
| #389 | black forest ham | 3 |
| #407 | black greaves | 4 |
| #402 | black helmet | 4 |
| #461 | black shield | 3 |
| #339 | black snake skin | 15 |
| #435 | black sword | 4 |
| #50 | blackberry | 1,001 |
| #269 | blackberry combat boots | 1 |
| #220 | blackberry moccasins | 1 |
| #226 | blackberry slippers | 1 |
| 🥈 | blue ribbon | 1 |
| #462 | bottle of Pinot Renoir | 2 |
| #459 | bottle of Vangoghbitussin | 1 |
| #4253 | bottle of goofballs | 2 |
| #461 | bottle of popskull | 3 |
| #403 | bowl of fishysoisse | 2 |
| #2495 | box of sunshine | 43 |
| #181 | box-in-the-box-in-the-box | 1 |
| #379 | bubblewrap ore | 4 |
| #956 | bubbly potion | 1 |
| #592 | can of maces | 1 |
| #442 | cardboard ore | 3 |
| #1660 | cheap toaster | 1 |
| #1066 | chef's hat | 1 |
| #370 | chrome sword | 2 |
| #1796 | clown hammer | 1 |
| #247 | cold hi mein | 1 |
| #705 | crowbarrr | 1 |
| #308 | daisy | 10 |
| #875 | dark potion | 2 |
| #1293 | dead guy's watch | 1 |
| #1480 | defective skull | 1 |
| #603 | dehydrated caviar | 2 |
| #58 | demon skin | 394 |
| #595 | desiccated apricot | 3 |
| #343 | dishrag | 1 |
| #1164 | drywall axe | 6 |
| #4232 | easter egg balloon | 2 |
| #796 | empty Cloaca-Cola bottle | 7 |
| #440 | enchanted barbell | 2 |
| #1374 | fat stacks of cash | 1 |
| #2393 | felt | 1 |
| #885 | flaming mushroom | 1 |
| #1610 | flashing novelty button | 1 |
| #274 | flower petal pie | 1 |
| #730 | flute of flat champagne | 2 |
| #576 | frozen Mob Penguin | 1 |
| #4728 | fuzzy dice | 1 |
| #1921 | ghost cucumber | 1 |
| #823 | gob of wet hair | 1 |
| #1244 | googly eye | 8 |
| #54 | grouchy restless spirit | 1,220 |
| #735 | grue egg omelette | 1 |
| #5198 | handful of confetti | 1 |
| #702 | handful of hand chalk | 17 |
| #796 | ice-cold Sir Schlitz | 63 |
| #424 | icy-hot katana | 1 |
| #210 | jabañero pepper | 2 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #1885 | joybuzzer | 1 |
| #1275 | length of string | 5 |
| #1023 | line | 1 |
| #162 | meat from yesterday | 14 |
| #856 | ninja hot pants | 1 |
| #153 | outrageous sombrero | 1 |
| #301 | phat turquoise bracelet | 1 |
| #590 | pitchfork | 1 |
| #588 | plot hole | 93 |
| #1183 | pool cue | 1 |
| #1434 | portable corkscrew | 1 |
| #768 | razor-tipped yo-yo | 10 |
| #407 | rhesus monkey | 1 |
| #795 | ridiculously huge sword | 5 |
| #1126 | ring of aggravate monster | 1 |
| #2133 | roll of toilet paper | 2 |
| #1959 | rubber emo roe | 1 |
| #487 | rusty grave robbing shovel | 5 |
| #253 | sausage pizza | 5 |
| #23 | seal tooth | 5,648 |
| #24 | seal-clubbing club | 11,121 |
| #16 | seal-skull helmet | 5,198 |
| #387 | secret blend of herbs and spices | 1 |
| #318 | sinister altar fragment | 1 |
| #1413 | skeleton bone | 1 |
| #944 | skeleton key | 1 |
| #1016 | smart skull | 1 |
| #397 | snarling wolf shield | 1 |
| #789 | snifter of thoroughly aged brandy | 3 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #222 | spicy noodles | 1 |
| #971 | spooky cosmetics bag | 2 |
| #1063 | spooky eyeliner | 1 |
| #433 | stale baguette | 2 |
| #925 | support cummerbund | 4 |
| #1272 | thin black candle | 10 |
| #508 | three-tiered wedding cake | 1 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #174 | tin star | 1 |
| #2766 | tiny plastic demoninja | 2 |
| #562 | tomato | 35 |
| #83 | turtle pheromones | 99 |
| #478 | wad of dough | 68 |
| #357 | walrus-tusk earring | 3 |
| #129 | whip kit | 3 |
| #391 | white chocolate chip cookies | 7 |
| #607 | white pixel | 20 |
| #552 | worn tophat | 1 |
| #740 | yellow glowstick | 1 |
| #202 | yummy death watch beetle | 1 |