| #426 | "DRINK ME" potion | 13 |
| #419 | 1337 7r0uZ0RZ | 15 |
| #1452 | 3-ball | 1 |
| #329 | 30669 scroll | 27 |
| #471 | 33398 scroll | 29 |
| #280 | 334 scroll | 22 |
| #1432 | 5-ball | 1 |
| #923 | 7-Foot Dwarven mattock | 1 |
| #1113 | 7-ball | 2 |
| #1419 | 8-ball | 6 |
| #2228 | Ancient Saucehelm | 1 |
| #812 | Angry Farmer candy | 60 |
| #4300 | Baron von Ratsworth's monocle | 1 |
| #586 | Blatantly Canadian | 1 |
| #1919 | Bonerdagon necklace | 2 |
| #926 | Boris's ring | 1 |
| #1678 | Boss Bat bling | 1 |
| #2772 | Boss Bat britches | 1 |
| #163 | Cerebral Cloche | 1 |
| #312 | Cerebral Crossbow | 1 |
| #188 | Cerebral Culottes | 1 |
| #272 | Crimbo ukulele | 1 |
| #1436 | Green Clover of Justice | 1 |
| #1987 | MagiMechTech NanoMechaMech | 1 |
| #969 | St. Sneaky Pete's Day goodies basket | 4 |
| #69 | Travoltan trousers | 1 |
| #200 | Unionize The Elves sign | 1 |
| #308 | a little sump'm sump'm | 9 |
| #895 | abominable snowcone | 6 |
| #1008 | acid-squirting flower | 1 |
| #663 | acoustic guitarrr | 3 |
| #714 | adder bladder | 2 |
| #616 | all-purpose cleaner | 2 |
| #498 | amulet of extreme plot significance | 22 |
| #601 | ancient Magi-Wipes | 2 |
| #672 | ancient protein powder | 1 |
| #3684 | ancient unspeakable fruitcake | 1 |
| #609 | ancient vinyl coin purse | 1 |
| #677 | anniversary balloon | 1 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| #1079 | annoying pitchfork | 1 |
| #521 | anticheese | 7 |
| #731 | antique hand mirror | 1 |
| #533 | antique painting of a landscape | 1 |
| #341 | arrrgyle socks | 7 |
| #435 | asbestos crossbow | 1 |
| #693 | asbestos ore | 6 |
| #262 | asbestos staff | 2 |
| #478 | asbestos sword | 1 |
| #883 | asparagus knife | 2 |
| #451 | aspirin | 2 |
| #197 | astral mushroom | 75 |
| #2065 | astronaut pants | 1 |
| #763 | awful poetry journal | 62 |
| #1539 | baby killer bee | 2 |
| #2445 | baconstone | 1 |
| #216 | baconstone pendant | 2 |
| #261 | baconstone ring | 1 |
| #6544 | badass belt | 2 |
| #1885 | bag of airline peanuts | 1 |
| #294 | balaclava | 2 |
| #493 | balaclava baklava | 3 |
| #305 | balloon helmet | 1 |
| #1026 | balloon monkey | 1 |
| #630 | ballroom blintz | 1 |
| #708 | bar skin | 8 |
| #958 | barbed-wire fence | 1 |
| #1588 | barrrnacle | 3 |
| #366 | barskin hat | 1 |
| #340 | baseball | 13 |
| #457 | bat guano | 16 |
| #512 | bat wing | 16 |
| #664 | bat-shaped Crimboween cookie | 3 |
| #522 | batblade | 3 |
| #589 | batgut | 24 |
| #585 | beach glass bead | 2 |
| #604 | beer bomb | 14 |
| #462 | beer bong | 2 |
| #284 | beer helmet | 13 |
| #540 | beer lens | 2 |
| #784 | beertini | 1 |
| #822 | bejeweled cufflinks | 2 |
| #329 | bejeweled pledge pin | 11 |
| #1062 | bell-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |
| #1006 | big red clown nose | 1 |
| #464 | big rock | 1 |
| #117 | bigger stick | 1 |
| #1501 | bit of clingfilm | 1 |
| #695 | black helmet | 1 |
| #2562 | black paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #609 | black pension check | 1 |
| #379 | black picnic basket | 2 |
| #2108 | black plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #2087 | black polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #667 | black shield | 1 |
| #855 | black snake skin | 1 |
| #2664 | black striped oyster egg | 1 |
| #801 | blackberry | 2 |
| #924 | blob-shaped Crimbo cookie | 7 |
| #1032 | bloody beer | 1 |
| #818 | bloody clown pants | 2 |
| #620 | bloody mary | 1 |
| #388 | blue class ring | 6 |
| #2553 | blue paisley oyster egg | 1 |
| #41 | blue pixel | 6,044 |
| #2408 | blue plastic oyster egg | 1 |
| #2374 | blue polka-dot oyster egg | 1 |
| #645 | blue snowcone | 4 |
| #1835 | blue striped oyster egg | 2 |
| #438 | blue-frosted astral cupcake | 2 |
| #665 | bone rattle | 1 |
| #188 | bottle of Definit | 10 |
| #564 | bottle of alcohol | 2 |
| #1080 | bottle of gin | 3 |
| #490 | bottle of sewage schnapps | 6 |
| #584 | bottle of vodka | 18 |
| #569 | bottle of whiskey | 43 |
| #910 | boxed wine | 7 |
| #569 | broken skull | 21 |
| #547 | can of fake snow | 1 |
| #213 | colored-light "necklace" | 2 |
| #619 | deck of tropical cards | 1 |
| #1635 | fake hand | 2 |
| #1290 | fancy but probably evil chocolate | 4 |
| #633 | fancy chocolate | 5 |
| #2154 | fruitcake | 4 |
| #2822 | gingerbread bugbear | 3 |
| #1070 | gingerbread horror | 6 |
| #39 | green pixel | 3,679 |
| #562 | green snowcone | 7 |
| #758 | herbal stuffing | 10 |
| #1885 | joybuzzer | 1 |
| #105 | misshapen animal skeleton | 1 |
| #2528 | nanite-infested candy cane | 3 |
| #2561 | nanite-infested eggnog | 2 |
| #2620 | nanite-infested fruitcake | 2 |
| #2716 | nanite-infested gingerbread bugbear | 2 |
| #388 | pink-frosted astral cupcake | 2 |
| #623 | purple snowcone | 7 |
| #647 | purple-frosted astral cupcake | 1 |
| #113 | red pixel | 178 |
| #4 | red pixel potion | 2,946 |
| #9 | red traffic cone | 1 |
| #106 | spandex anniversary shorts | 1 |
| #1948 | spooky eggnog | 3 |
| #942 | spooky stick | 3 |
| #945 | stick of "gum" | 1 |
| #2031 | teddy bear | 1 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #3079 | tiny plastic Crimbo elf | 2 |
| #4229 | tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #2898 | tiny plastic Crimbo wreath | 1 |
| #1548 | tiny plastic Crimboween pentagram | 1 |
| #1530 | tiny plastic Scream Queen | 1 |
| #2947 | tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo | 1 |
| #4533 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 1 |
| #1731 | tiny plastic ancient yuletide troll | 1 |
| #4471 | tiny plastic bitchin' meatcar | 1 |
| #1736 | tiny plastic gift-wrapping vampire | 1 |
| #2703 | tiny plastic hermit | 2 |
| #2595 | tiny plastic pastamancer | 2 |
| #1557 | tiny plastic skeletal reindeer | 1 |
| #2290 | tiny plastic sweet nutcracker | 3 |
| #4474 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 1 |
| #1100 | tofurkey gravy | 7 |
| #1101 | tofurkey leg | 7 |
| #2210 | toy jet pack | 1 |
| #2475 | toy ray gun | 1 |
| #2263 | toy space helmet | 1 |
| #479 | tree skirt | 1 |
| #1135 | tropical wrapping paper | 1 |
| #21 | white pixel | 6,278 |
| #1041 | wreath-shaped Crimbo cookie | 1 |