| #774 | 'WILL WORK FOR BOOZE' sign | 1 |
| #322 | 7-Foot Dwarven mattock | 9 |
| #468 | ASCII shirt | 3 |
| #415 | Aluminum Epsilon of Humility | 1 |
| #865 | Amulet of Yendor | 14 |
| #1322 | Ancient Saucehelm | 2 |
| #1378 | Angry Farmer candy | 13 |
| #4251 | Crown of the Goblin King | 1 |
| #189 | Tropical Crimbo Sword | 1 |
| #1000 | Wand of Nagamar | 2 |
| #365 | a butt tuba | 1 |
| #309 | a little sump'm sump'm | 9 |
| #570 | abominable snowcone | 15 |
| #461 | adder bladder | 10 |
| #486 | all-purpose cleaner | 5 |
| #116 | alpha-mail pants | 1 |
| #852 | amulet of extreme plot significance | 7 |
| #353 | ancient Magi-Wipes | 11 |
| #166 | ancient frozen dinner | 14 |
| #433 | ancient protein powder | 6 |
| #1252 | ancient unspeakable fruitcake | 5 |
| #409 | anniversary balloon | 2 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| #630 | ant agonist | 1 |
| #416 | anti-anti-antidote | 2 |
| #269 | anticheese | 31 |
| #731 | antique hand mirror | 1 |
| #899 | antique helmet | 1 |
| #906 | antique shield | 1 |
| #485 | armgun | 1 |
| #238 | arrrgyle socks | 11 |
| #181 | asbestos crossbow | 4 |
| #801 | asbestos ore | 4 |
| #188 | asbestos staff | 3 |
| #478 | asbestos sword | 1 |
| #303 | asparagus knife | 24 |
| #469 | asshat | 2 |
| #1082 | astronaut pants | 5 |
| #1660 | awful poetry journal | 3 |
| #1328 | baby killer bee | 3 |
| #657 | baconstone | 12 |
| #407 | baconstone pendant | 1 |
| #5055 | badass belt | 5 |
| #133 | badger badge | 1 |
| #712 | bag of airline peanuts | 39 |
| #1216 | baggie of powdered sugar | 1 |
| #430 | balaclava | 1 |
| #247 | ball-in-a-cup | 1 |
| #1030 | balloon monkey | 1 |
| #525 | ballroom blintz | 2 |
| #88 | bamboo bokuto | 3 |
| #458 | bar skin | 19 |
| #252 | barbed-wire fence | 24 |
| #103 | bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme | 1 |
| #290 | blood of the Wereseal | 1 |
| #283 | calle de miel | 5 |
| #1373 | fat stacks of cash | 1 |
| #158 | funky brass fez | 1 |
| #56 | gazing shoes | 1 |
| #3940 | gingerbread bugbear | 1 |
| #2077 | mafia aria | 1 |
| #709 | mariachi G-string | 1 |
| #84 | menorette | 4 |
| #323 | tasket | 1 |
| 🥇 | time sleigh | 1 |
| #28 | tiny knife and fork | 13 |
| #650 | tiny plastic 11 Dealer | 1 |
| #3991 | tiny plastic 7-foot dwarf | 1 |
| #3116 | tiny plastic Baron von Ratsworth | 1 |
| #1130 | tiny plastic Cheshire bat | 16 |
| #4313 | tiny plastic Crimbo elf | 1 |
| #4232 | tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer | 1 |
| #1747 | tiny plastic Crimbo wreath | 2 |
| #403 | tiny plastic Mr. Mination | 1 |
| #3065 | tiny plastic The Big Wisniewski | 1 |
| #2948 | tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo | 1 |
| #1794 | tiny plastic accordion thief | 3 |
| #1415 | tiny plastic angry goat | 13 |
| #1134 | tiny plastic baby gravy fairy | 16 |
| #1214 | tiny plastic barrrnacle | 15 |
| #990 | tiny plastic bitchin' meatcar | 5 |
| #1177 | tiny plastic blood-faced volleyball | 15 |
| #1638 | tiny plastic cocoabo | 11 |
| #1112 | tiny plastic coffee pixie | 16 |
| #1097 | tiny plastic disco bandit | 5 |
| #1408 | tiny plastic fuzzy dice | 13 |
| #1305 | tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick | 14 |
| #1128 | tiny plastic ghuol whelp | 16 |
| #1218 | tiny plastic grue | 15 |
| #845 | tiny plastic hermit | 6 |
| #1517 | tiny plastic howling balloon monkey | 12 |
| #912 | tiny plastic killer bee | 19 |
| #952 | tiny plastic leprechaun | 19 |
| #940 | tiny plastic levitating potato | 19 |
| #1303 | tiny plastic mosquito | 14 |
| #830 | tiny plastic pastamancer | 6 |
| #754 | tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime | 23 |
| #830 | tiny plastic sauceror | 6 |
| #841 | tiny plastic seal clubber | 6 |
| #1655 | tiny plastic spooky pirate skeleton | 11 |
| #766 | tiny plastic stab bat | 23 |
| #4041 | tiny plastic sweet nutcracker | 1 |
| #2660 | tiny plastic turtle tamer | 2 |
| #3854 | tiny plastic whitesnake | 1 |
| #265 | tisket | 1 |
| #673 | toothsome rock | 14 |
| #504 | tropical orchid | 2 |
| #599 | tropical paperweight | 1 |
| #1132 | tropical wrapping paper | 1 |
| #429 | white hat hacker T-shirt | 2 |
| #330 | wreath-shaped Crimbo cookie | 3 |
| #2366 | yo-yo | 1 |
| #1862 | zombie pineal gland | 1 |