| #12 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #9 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #10 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #26 | Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones (used) | 1 |
| #811 | Blizzards I Have Died In | 1 |
| #36 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) | 1 |
| #33 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) | 1 |
| #35 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) | 1 |
| #32 | CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) | 1 |
| #6 | Celsius 233 (singed) | 1 |
| #1479 | Crimbo Candy Cookbook | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Mathematical Precision (dirty) | 1 |
| 🥈 | Crimbot ROM: Rapid Prototyping (dirty) | 1 |
| #4 | Crimbot ROM: Ruthless Efficiency (dirty) | 1 |
| #16 | Ellsbury's journal (used) | 1 |
| #211 | Elron's Explosive Etude | 1 |
| #172 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy | 1 |
| #13 | Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy (shredded) | 1 |
| 🥈 | Fuzzby | 1 |
| #105 | Ghost Pinching Quarterly | 1 |
| 🥉 | Hjodor's Guide to Arctic Dalmatians (used) | 1 |
| #158 | NPZR chemistry set | 36 |
| #12 | Peek-a-Boo! | 1 |
| #143 | Really Expensive Jewelry and You | 1 |
| #7 | Spelunker of Fortune (used) | 1 |
| #68 | Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) | 1 |
| #21 | The Art of Slapfighting (used) | 1 |
| #48 | The Joy of Wassailing (used) | 1 |
| #57 | The Necbronomicon (used) | 1 |
| #102 | The Snitch's Manifesto | 1 |
| #98 | The Thorax's Codex of Tormenting Plants | 1 |
| #26 | Time Bandit Time Towel | 2 |
| #16 | Time Cape | 1 |
| #14 | alien source code printout (used) | 1 |
| #288 | bag of W&Ws | 6 |
| #241 | bag of lard | 5 |
| #447 | beet-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar | 2 |
| #193 | black eyedrops | 4 |
| #151 | blob of Alphredo™ | 3 |
| #175 | bottle of Mystic Shell | 5 |
| #343 | bottle of antifreeze | 3 |
| #133 | bottle of pirate juice | 6 |
| #152 | bottle of rhinoceros hormones | 3 |
| #335 | box of Dweebs | 1 |
| #464 | cabbage-flavored Mr. Mediocrebar | 2 |
| #733 | can of spinach | 2 |
| #435 | candied bolts | 4 |
| #177 | candied nuts | 6 |
| #82 | cube of billiard chalk | 5 |
| #72 | distention pill | 4 |
| #63 | disturbing fanfic | 5,617 |
| #4 | eldritch tincture (depleted) | 1 |
| #234 | electrical thingamabob | 33 |
| #32 | facehugging alien | 43 |
| #42 | furry fur | 6,097 |
| #425 | furry pants | 1 |
| #38 | hand-carved bokken | 3 |
| #80 | longhaired hippy wig | 7 |
| #241 | orange peel hat | 2 |
| #8 | papier-mâché toothpicks | 7 |
| #141 | plastic ingot | 85 |
| 🥈 | record of infuriating silence (used) | 1 |
| #25 | record of menacing silence | 1 |
| 🥉 | record of menacing silence (used) | 1 |
| 🥈 | record of tranquil silence (used) | 1 |
| #728 | squirming egg sac | 6 |
| #45 | warbear metalworking primer (used) | 1 |
| #325 | warbear whosit | 356 |
| #214 | wolf mask | 159 |