| #19 | Cocktails of the Age of Sail | 4 |
| #59 | Crimbuccaneer bombjacket | 1 |
| #22 | Crimbuccaneer fledges (disintegrating) | 3 |
| #33 | Crimbuccaneer invasion map | 3 |
| #52 | Crimbuccaneer lantern | 1 |
| #69 | Crimbuccaneer nose ring | 1 |
| #35 | Crimbuccaneer premium booty sack | 4 |
| #47 | Crimbuccaneer runebone | 1 |
| #94 | Crimbuccaneer shirt | 3 |
| #41 | Crimbuccaneer tattoo gift certificate | 3 |
| #35 | Crimbuccaneer tavern swab | 1 |
| #9 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Culinary Arts | 9 |
| #34 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Extortion | 5 |
| #10 | Elf Guard Field Manual: Wilderness Sleeping | 7 |
| #24 | Elf Guard SCUBA tank | 2 |
| #41 | Elf Guard broom | 1 |
| #53 | Elf Guard clipboard | 1 |
| #18 | Elf Guard fuel tank | 4 |
| #32 | Elf Guard hangover cure | 2 |
| #30 | Elf Guard honor present | 10 |
| #17 | Elf Guard insignia (general) | 7 |
| #21 | Elf Guard red and white beret | 3 |
| #19 | Elf Guard safety bear | 7 |
| #28 | Elf Guard squirtgun | 2 |
| #31 | Elf Guard strategic map | 3 |
| #24 | Elf Guard temporary (permanent) tattoo | 4 |
| #22 | Elvish underarmor | 2 |
| #87 | Hodgman's almanac | 1 |
| #95 | Hodgman's harmonica | 1 |
| #64 | Hodgman's metal detector | 1 |
| #98 | Hodgman's varcolac paw | 1 |
| #21 | Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration (crumpled) | 1 |
| #19 | Lil' Snowball Factory | 11 |
| 🥈 | Pocket Guide to Mild Evil (used) | 1 |
| #82 | The Encyclopedia of Fruit | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #41 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 1 | 1 |
| #38 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 2 | 1 |
| #33 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 3 | 1 |
| #37 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 4 | 1 |
| #40 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 5 | 1 |
| #35 | The Night Before Crimbo, Ch. 6 | 1 |
| #1558 | Thwaitgold Goliath beetle statuette | 1 |
| #396 | Thwaitgold bombardier beetle statuette | 1 |
| #105 | Thwaitgold dragonfly statuette | 22 |
| #233 | Thwaitgold fairyfly statue | 1 |
| #887 | Thwaitgold firefly statuette | 5 |
| #87 | Thwaitgold harvestman statuette | 1 |
| #118 | Thwaitgold keyhole spider statuette | 3 |
| #248 | Thwaitgold slug statuette | 18 |
| #160 | Thwaitgold splendor beetle statuette | 4 |
| #435 | Thwaitgold termite statuette | 18 |
| #59 | Thwaitgold time fly statuette | 2 |
| #25 | ancient Elf dessert spoon | 2 |
| #227 | anniversary chutney sculpture | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary concrete fedora | 1 |
| 🥈 | anniversary safety glass vest | 1 |
| #44 | baby bark scorpion | 1 |
| #79 | baby rigging snake | 1 |
| #42 | barnacle-encrusted sweater | 2 |
| #19 | bottle of Ooze-O | 100 |
| #39 | brown pirate pants | 2 |
| 🥇 | bucket of anniversary lard | 1 |
| #938 | chocolate-covered diamond-studded roses | 1 |
| #141 | corned beet | 1 |
| #399 | designer handbag | 7 |
| #48 | fat stacks of cash | 999 |
| #11 | free boots | 4 |
| #13 | gatorskin umbrella | 100 |
| #64 | ghost thread | 1 |
| #16 | gilded trumpet | 1 |
| #64 | government booze shipment | 1 |
| #69 | government candy shipment | 1 |
| #67 | government food shipment | 1 |
| #31 | gunwale | 1 |
| #98 | huge gold coin | 100 |
| #43 | jar of anniversary jam | 1 |
| #25 | massive wrench | 3 |
| #20 | mime army camouflage kit | 10 |
| #228 | mime army rations | 1 |
| #152 | mime army superserum | 1 |
| #205 | mime army wine | 1 |
| #11 | oil of oiliness | 300 |
| #940 | orange | 1 |
| #86 | pet anchor | 2 |
| #134 | pickled bread | 1 |
| #30 | punching mirror | 2 |
| #1217 | really dense meat stack | 3 |
| #14 | replica Elf Guard medal | 3 |
| #140 | salted mutton | 1 |
| #159 | sand dollar | 100 |
| #14 | sequin-encrusted sweater | 5 |
| #38 | sewer wad | 100 |
| #988 | squirming egg sac | 1 |
| #68 | strange helix fossil | 1 |
| #38 | stuffed kraken | 3 |
| #565 | tiny die-cast goose a-laying | 1 |
| #803 | tiny plastic Duke Starkiller | 1 |
| #779 | tiny plastic Gary Claybender | 1 |
| #39 | tiny plastic Penny | 1 |
| #65 | tiny plastic The Silent Nightmare | 1 |
| #71 | tiny plastic mime executive | 1 |
| #71 | tiny plastic mime functionary | 1 |
| #72 | tiny plastic mime scientist | 1 |
| #74 | tiny plastic mime soldier | 1 |
| #8 | unfortunate dumplings | 100 |
| #38 | whalegun | 1 |