| #122 | "DRINK ME" potion | 321 |
| #55 | Bustle Hustler | 1 |
| #193 | Cheer-Up soda | 1 |
| #27 | Dallas Dynasty Falcon Crest shield | 1 |
| #38 | Fabiotion | 1 |
| #19 | Lolsipop | 75 |
| #31 | Swedish massage fish | 3 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 1 (used) | 1 |
| #4 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 2 (used) | 1 |
| #5 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 3 (used) | 1 |
| #8 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 4 (used) | 1 |
| #7 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 5 (used) | 1 |
| 🥉 | The Journal of Mime Science Vol. 6 (used) | 1 |
| #43 | Third Base | 2 |
| #100 | Ze™ goggles | 50 |
| #2604 | anniversary gift box | 1 |
| #603 | bejeweled cufflinks | 5 |
| #297 | black and white cracker | 1 |
| #190 | black spot | 4 |
| #626 | can of Binarrrca | 14 |
| #128 | cheer extractor | 1 |
| #57 | cheer-o-gram | 12 |
| #109 | cheerful Crimbo sweater | 1 |
| #87 | cheerful antler hat | 1 |
| #86 | cheerful pajama pants | 1 |
| #88 | crystalline cheer | 1,328 |
| #909 | designer handbag | 2 |
| #17 | eaves droppers | 76 |
| #253 | empty agua de vida bottle | 838 |
| #500 | fancy opera glasses | 7 |
| #618 | garish pinky ring | 5 |
| #80 | genie's bracers | 1 |
| #68 | genie's pants | 2 |
| #68 | genie's scimitar | 2 |
| #52 | genie's turbane | 3 |
| #776 | giant designer sunglasses | 3 |
| 🥇 | hand-knitted Crimbo socks | 1 |
| #20 | heart cozy | 80 |
| #43 | heart-shaped candy whetstone | 3 |
| #19 | heather graham cracker | 7 |
| #33 | hushed puppy | 6 |
| #23 | incredibly dense meat gem | 1 |
| #71 | lost key | 52 |
| #128 | mime army camouflage kit | 1 |
| #71 | mime army challenge coin | 1 |
| #19 | mime army infiltration glove | 1 |
| #22 | mime army insignia (cryonics) | 1 |
| #25 | mime army insignia (espionage) | 1 |
| #24 | mime army insignia (infantry) | 1 |
| #25 | mime army insignia (intelligence) | 1 |
| #26 | mime army insignia (morale) | 1 |
| #17 | mime army insignia (psychological warfare) | 1 |
| #38 | mime army insignia (pyrotechnics) | 1 |
| #18 | mime army insignia (sanitation) | 1 |
| #227 | mime army rations | 1 |
| #152 | mime army superserum | 1 |
| #205 | mime army wine | 1 |
| #73 | mime pocket probe | 1 |
| 🥇 | mime-proof sunglasses | 1 |
| #78 | miming beret | 1 |
| #85 | miming boots | 1 |
| #100 | miming corduroys | 1 |
| #93 | miming gloves | 1 |
| #95 | miming shirt | 1 |
| #264 | muffled muffuletta | 2 |
| #147 | oldcake | 3 |
| #20 | personal graffiti kit | 80 |
| #86 | pool torpedo | 54 |
| #80 | powdered gold | 3 |
| #89 | primitive candy cane | 4 |
| #42 | psychic's amulet | 86 |
| #42 | psychic's circlet | 75 |
| #45 | psychic's crystal ball | 72 |
| #43 | psychic's pslacks | 71 |
| #121 | runny fermented egg | 3 |
| #22 | scintillating oyster egg | 31 |
| #240 | shushed potatoes | 2 |
| 🥇 | silent nightlight | 1 |
| #46 | soggy used band-aid | 57 |
| 🥉 | stale Cheer-E-Os | 1,442 |
| 🥉 | stale cheer wine | 1,543 |
| #1396 | stuffed Baron von Ratsworth | 26 |
| #1203 | stuffed Meat | 35 |
| #829 | stuffed key | 62 |
| #1311 | stuffed mink | 30 |
| #1223 | stuffed monocle | 34 |
| #1214 | stuffed teddy butler | 34 |
| #1300 | stuffed tin of caviar | 31 |
| #937 | stuffed treasure chest | 51 |
| #94 | stylish swimsuit | 49 |
| #65 | tiny plastic Abuela Crimbo | 1 |
| #61 | tiny plastic Café Elf | 1 |
| #67 | tiny plastic The Silent Nightmare | 1 |
| #71 | tiny plastic mime executive | 1 |
| #72 | tiny plastic mime functionary | 1 |
| #72 | tiny plastic mime scientist | 1 |
| #74 | tiny plastic mime soldier | 1 |
| #57 | tiny plastic orphan | 1 |
| #58 | tiny plastic reindeer | 1 |
| #53 | tiny plastic wild beaver | 1 |
| #30 | tonic o' Banderas | 2 |
| #88 | traditional Crimbo cookie | 10 |
| #215 | transparent nog | 2 |
| #32 | unfinished fruitcake | 7 |
| #66 | watered-down Red Minotaur | 59 |