This is a skein of yarn in a particularly heinous greenish-yellow shade. Only a color-blind or extremely fashion-deficient cat would play with it, and only a little old lady would make a toilet paper cozy out of it.

Actually, only a little old lady would make a toilet paper cozy out of anything. Me, I prefer my toilet paper to be as uncozy as possible. I mean, it doesn't have a particularly bright future in store for it; there's no use coddling it beforehand.